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TT - enjoy your family weekend, hope Max doesn't get too freaked out by all the new faces giving him a big squeeze.
Louise - welcome to the running mum's club. I've got 3 beautiful (noisy) girls aged 7, 3 and nearly 9 months. I know what you mean about feeling guilty when running sometimes, unfortunately I have to work full time so I already don't see my kids as much as I'd like to so I do sometimes feel bad when I duck out for my weekend runs. Luckily the youngest 2 still have middle of the day sleeps though so I usually try and go for any long Sunday runs then so they don't even notice I'm gone and the eldest is allowed to watch TV when the little ones are asleep so she's not too bothered. As we all know, when you have kids it just becomes one big juggling act and running is just another ball we have to try and keep in the air.
MM - no recommendations for a high chair apart from to say avoid the padded Mothercare ones - mine is such a crappy design that food is forever getting trapped down the sides and it's really hard to clean out. Glad to hear boys had a nice birthday - are you shopping for pirates today?
Does anybody have the Shock Absorber Run bra? Just wondered about the sizing of them - my boobs have shrunk so much since I've stopped bf Anna that I suspect they're even smaller now than before I got pregnant so am thinking I might go for a smaller size unless they come up small already? Anybody else got one? BTW - they've got 15% off the price of them at SheActive - although prices there are usually higher than everywhere else so might not actually be that much cheaper.
Louise (I'm a Louise too in RL!) - you can add the thread as a bookmark by clicking on 'add bookmark' right at the bottom of the page - assuming you are logged in. It then appears in 'my bookmarks' which you can access via the homepage or at the top right of the screen. hope this makes sense!
MM - glad the boys had a nice day. good luck with the weaning! no recommendations on collapsible wooden chair - but don't under ANY circumstances get fooled into buying a plastic one with padded plastic cushions. you will NEVER get it clean!
re: running bras, karen - yes get the smaller size. i have the shock absorber ones and have a smaller one than i should need, as i like my (now small post bf!) boobs squashed and contained! and it's not uncomfy in the least.
Boo to the cold, MM - not what you need. I'd say go with your instinct on the weaning. I'd probably just stick with the baby rice and maybe introduce some fruit puree in a couple of weeks, until she turns 6 months. Weaning will probably be a lot easier than it was the first time round, as you've already been through it once. Also a big fan of GF - I was a bit like you, Anjelicals, clueless about babies and I'm the sort of person who a) needs a structured routine or I go demented and b) needs a manual! GF was the nearest thing I could find to a baby instruction manual (!) for those first few weeks. I just needed someone to tell me what to do and when to do it and GF fit the bill perfectly. As others have said though, you need to adapt it a bit to suit you/your baby. Remember stressing that Kit would NOT stay awake in the morning until 9:30 after being woken at 7:00 and would always want to be asleep again by 8:30, so I just went with him rather than worrying about it.
Karen, I have the Shock Absorber running bra, can't remember the model number though as it's been so long since I last bought any In fact you've reminded me to order some more - one of mine is coming apart and I noticed after my long run last weekend one of my boobs was chafed underneath and rather sore. The tear in the bra obviously means it's not sitting tightly enough any more and is rubbing. Not good.
Louise, welcome to the thread! You will probably struggle to keep up as we are rather a chatty lot! I have a 3.5 year old son, Kit.
JohBo, what a bummer about your knees. I totally know where you're coming from on the identity thing - it was something I really struggled with when I first became a mum. Just felt I'd "lost" myself somewhere and I really needed my running to feel I had regained some sort of connection with my "old" life and to give me something I did on my own. So I can imagine how hard it is for you not being able to run. I really hope you get some answers soon so you at least know where you stand rather than being in constant limbo.
TTid, sounds like you have a busy weekend lined up.
Bad night last night. The eye infection I had a couple of weeks ago came back completely out of nowhere - was standing cooking and suddenly realised my eye was really itching, and by the time I got to the mirror in the hall it had swelled up around the tear duct and under the eye. Bizarrely I was cooking exactly the same meal when it happened last time. Sounds weird but am wondering if I'm reacting to garlic? The meal I was cooking last night is probably the only thing I regularly cook with garlic - I do tend to rub my eyes when I'm tired so maybe I rubbed them with garlicky fingers? Anyway I still have the eye drops from last time and swelling has subsided this morning. On top of that, as I carried the pan of pasta over to the sink to drain, I managed to accidentally slosh boiling water all over my hand and despite plunging it straight into cold water and keeping it there for most of the evening it was burning and throbbing like crazy - I couldn't sleep because it was so painful. In the end I wrapped a wet flannel around it and put my hand in a plastic bag so the bed stayed dry. Woke at 4am and the throbbing had stopped; it's very red but no blistering so thankfully the cold flannel took the heat out and kept it moist. What an idiot!
Minks - ouch to the eye thing and the hand, hope both are better soon. My bras, like yours, are falling apart as well as being too big - I've been wearing 2 whenever I go out running in the hope that collectively they'll give me enough support but think it's now time to finally splash out and buy new ones.
Johbo - could be teething or just a bit of a growth spurt so he's super hungry. Are you up to 3 meals a day yet, maybe just start introducing more snacks between meals if you are. Anna has a bit of toast mid morning and fruit and/or youghurt mid afternoon on top of her 3 meals so we're now down to 3 bottles a day (9.30am / 2.30pm / 7.30pm).
New Shock Absorber bra ordered in a 34B!! (£32.40 from Wiggle with no packaging charge). Haven't been in a B cup since I was a teenager - breastfeeding x 3 has well and truly shrunk my boobs beyond recognition, can't believe I was up to a 34G not so long ago when bf Anna. BTW - stopped bf 11 weeks ago now and still no sign of AF, I'm sure it came back quicker than this after the last 2. Shouldn't complain really though as happier not to have to bother with them, will be typical if it turns up this week on holiday after saying that ...
I'm signing off for a week now as will be frantically packing tonight and tomorrow morning and I also want to try and squeeze in a run in the morning before we go. Have a good week everyone.
(((Minks))) Maybe you are allergic to something in that dish? You could try wearing thin rubber gloves when you're doing all the chopping maybe? Perhaps you'd be less likely to rub your eye with gloves on?
Johbo, I know exactly where you're coming from with losing your identity. I really struggled with it for a good few months and have only really got my head round the fact that I am a housewife for the next few years. Someone on here mentioned charity work which I thought was a good idea. Having said that I still haven't heard anything back from the people I've volunteered to work for, not too sure what that says about me! I hope you manage to get your knees sorted soon and get back out running, it's definitely theraputic.
TT, it must be nice to be back in the UK and able to show Max off to all your family. It sounds like he's coping really well with the time difference too which is a bonus! How are you coping with it? I did like your comment about this forum being like the Hotel California
Welcome to the forums Louise. I have an 8 month old daughter called Abigail. Her middle name is Louise. I agree with what others have said, it's a great forum to chat about everything, including running sometimes!
I should just mention that I have only told you ladies (and RB if he's lurking) about piglet no.2. Obviously with it being such early days I'm keeping it off Facebook.
I did my last run before the half marathon last night. It was only a 3 miler but it was good to get out. I'm looking forward to Sunday now but am nervous that I'll get carried away and try to get a PB of some description.
MM, a pirate ship without pirates I have the basic plastic high chair from Ikea. It's ok but it doesn't fold away which, in hindsight, would have been a good thing to have. Good luck with the weaning.
I too have that shock absorber bra and now that you all mention it it maybe does come up a bit big cos there's a few wrinkles in the fabric though that would mean getting a 34A and I am not an A!
ELC stuff just arrived. yay!
Well I got my test results. I did ovulate last month apparently even though machine didn't give me any peak days. Apparently if you have over 30 in progesterone level then you ovulated and mine was 35. None of this means anything to me. Anyway since it came back normal and since that is now 18 months of trying I am getting referred for further investigations. I am not sure yet how far I will take this. I think I will find out if there are any physical problems like blockage or anything but if nothing then I am not sure I want to go down the IVF line. I still think (was it Sonya or Johbo who sugg this) that maybe it is a case of ovulating pretty late and so there's no window for the egg to implant before my body is wheeching it all out of me.
Am just sitting here thinking ow why am I aching but of course I had PT last night and we did a ton of abs stuff. ouch.
Off to get some lunch. half a day to go til weekend. bliss. might get some vino too.
EF - you sound like you are coping pretty well with all of it. (())
just had run in over text message with T. friend from down the lane (with two kids same age as J and E) invited me and them to a bonfire night thing at her house. but it is T's weekend. she said she would like it if we could all come, and i said i would speak to T about it. she is a good friend of mine as well as being the mother of J's best friend.
T has replied to the text ripping into me saying i display nothing but contempt and dislike for him, and i never reciprocate with any 'give' towards him.
i know he is hurting but that is also untrue. i organised an afternoon out on his birthday - getting a cake which i got the pub to bring out for him. and that was on my weekend with the kids. and then another weekend when it was my weekend, i let him have a whole day with the kids as he had been away to france in the week and i had had them for an extra night.
it is just so depressing. and i hate the way he rips into me all the time...
Karen, hope you have a fantastic holiday and enjoy the break! LOL at boob shrinkage; interestingly mine are the same size as they were pre-pregnancy but maybe it's more to do with not having breastfed. Just went online to buy a couple of new Shock Absorber bras only to find the model I have been wearing basically ever since I started running is discontinued. Not sure what to opt for now. It was just a very basic crop-top style, nothing fancy - I don't think it was even marketed as a running bra as they tend to be high impact and I think it was medium. Hey ho, will have to shop around now.
EF, not sure where that leaves you really I suppose it's good to know that you're ovulating although a bit odd that if that's the case your Clearblue thing didn't indicate it. What investigations are they going to refer you for? In some ways I guess it would be nice if they found something physical because at least that way it could be addressed. Unexplained infertility is very hard to deal with. Obvious question but I assume hubby has also been tested?
PP, our lips are sealed
((CM)) Crossed posts. He is a complete sh*t. Perhaps you should point out those things you just mentioned (if you haven't already) as maybe he just doesn't realise? Yes, he is hurting but so are you, and anyway the entire situation is of his own making because if he had been decent to you over the years and pleasant to live with and be around, and had treated you with respect, then you probably wouldn't have been forced to leave him.
It's not as though he wouldn't have the kids for the remainder of the weekend, and presumably we're only talking about a matter of hours? I have to say I think you'll end up going down the residency (is that what it's called?) path because even though you seem to be bending over backwards to accommodate him and minimise the impact of the sitaution on him, he doesn't show you the same consideration.
And FWIW, you were quite right to step in over the smoke alarm situation. Which has alerted me to the fact that I haven't noticed a smoke alarm in our house anywhere - must investigate.
minks - thanks. i did point out to him that i *had* 'given', with the birthday weekend and also with extra time when he was away in the week. but he then said he didn't want to get into the details of who did what / when, but that was precisely what he said to me.
i can never get a straight answer when i ask a question. he never replies to emails; he usually only replies to texts to have a go at me and then when i respond to that, he doesn't reply again. he never listens to voicemail messages, and he never answers his phone when i call him.
this week i emailed him (at work and home) with a subject of nanny's pay in capitals. it was detailing what he needed to pay her this month and the breakdown of childcare vouchers / bank transfers in future. asked him this morning if he had read it, and he said 'i haven't got a mail from you'. he then checked his phone and said 'oh - yes i have'. OMG!! if i hadn't checked...
i don't know how to communicate with him. this is one of the main reasons our relationship failed. but it is making it so hard over the children as his automatic response to anything i say is to be arsey back at me, and then not to respond to whatever the question was.
(((CM))) I think this is all part of his 'hurt'. He is deliberately making things difficult for you and being as uncooperative as he can. Maybe you need to ask him how he would like you to communicate with him, when he never responds via any of the usual channels? Can he not understand that it is the children who will suffer if some form of agreement over how you communicate about them is not reached?
I suspect that he is finding it all much more of a struggle than he expected and resents you for putting him in this position. His arsiness is probably really defensiveness because you're having to remind him and chase him up on things he really ought to be able to manage unprompted which, if he's as much of a control freak as he seems to be from your posts, he'll hate.
Not that this helps you, of course ...
Oh CM. He is a total nightmare, and all sounds so similar to the stuff going on with my Mum and step Dad, but worse obviously as no kids involved. You are doing your best and I guess thats all you can do until something is resolved.
Still feeling very rotten here, but have managed to cook 3 slab cakes ready for cutting up tomorrow!! House smells yummy!! Boys watching Cars, naughty Mummy!! They are really tired though, end of term exhaustion!
I shrank from 36DD when feeding the twins to 32AA. I was 32A beforehand. I am currently 34B, but wondering what I'm going to shrink to this time 32-AAA!!!
I won't do that long on just baby rice Minks, just go with it after a few days then do some veg/fruit but won't start any protein until 6 months. Boys were fine and she seems so ready, waking up from naps starving hungry, trying to grab food, chewing her hands all the time, so I think she's ready. Plus the loss of weight thing, I'm just gonna go for it!!
This is high chair I thought looked quite cool, that or wooden one if I can get one cheap off ebay...
(((CM))) - I have always felt really sad for you when you talk about how mean T is especially when you are so accommodating. He must realise that all he is going to achieve is make you more determined to get full custody of the kids. Please make sure you document everything in case it does get legal.
Joh - sorry to hear about the MRI - fingers crossed you can get some answers soon - if it is just the after effects of having a baby, then hopefully it will start to feel better soon.
Minks - you're not having a good time are you? Hope your hand is better now and it does sound as though you must be allergic to something in your dinner. Nightmare!
Karen - I have probably missed you but if not, have a lovely holiday. Did you tell us where you were going?
PP - good point about keeping Mum (so to speak!!) on FB - these forums do blend into one a bit and I would hate to have dropped a clanger by mentioning it over there. How are you feeling? Any side effects yet? I am not doing too badly with the jet lag, it looks as though Max is dropping off again, great - can get on with some stuff!
looks funky, MM, but i would be suspicious of any wipe-clean-able cover now, after my experience with the plastic cover over foam on J's chair from mamas and papas. in the end i went for a completely wooden chair with E - no cushions at all. you wipe and scrub along the folds in the cushion (faux leather or not) and eventually they will split... but maybe that is just me.
just have a booster seat on a chair for E now. but she is a nightmare and puts her feet on the table and pushes backwards, almost tipping the chair back. i have the piano right behind her chair and one day she is going to topple backwards and land on the piano...
a friend of mine reckons with T it is all about being in control. so this whole posturing around my unreasonableness and refusing to answer questions or reply to anything is to do with him not wanting to 'consent' to me in any way. i guess it is probably true but it is making it very hard to make any kind of arrangements with him. everything is a problem. and any time i ask any kind of question i am confronted with a whole load of grief from him first. and even then i rarely get an answer - just a 'well we need to discuss that', and when i try to discuss it, i get the 'i don't feel like being that generous' thing back.
i really hope the kids don't inherit his awkwardness...
Minks sounds like you need to delegate that dish to hubbie for cooking!! Must admit we use loads of garlic as we make everything from scratch. I have tonnes from the garden we are just wading through now!! Hope it feels better, and ouch to the hand, but so easily done.
Arrrhhh, boys being a nightmare!!!
EF semi good news then?
Right need to take them out on their bikes I think. Nightmare. Can't believe hubbie not coming home till much later either. Arrrhhhh!!!
By the time I've decided what to buy CM, she will be 3!! LOL
Missed karen off on hols. Have a great time...
yes i missed karen off on hols too. have fun!
boo to the colds / sore eyes / burnt hands.
i managed to do a 4 mile run just now with no knee pain. cautiously optimistic that it is on the mend.
going on a day's welsh course tomorrow. bit worried as i have realised that it is for people who are doing a welsh evening course and want a practice day. and i am ... erm ... definitely NOT doing a welsh evening course. or in fact any welsh at all really. argh!! could be well out of my depth!!
at least it will keep me busy all day tomorrow. (9.15 to 3.45pm plus getting there and back). then on sunday i can clean and shop and i pick the kids up at 6pm. and by the time i go for a run and do washing etc, the day will fly by. HOPEFULLY.
i have kids mon - tues and it is half term so i am taking the days off and the nanny is having a well deserved break. so am planning on going to techniquest in cardiff on mon (science-y type museum), and going to see friend in cheltenham on tues (she has 3 kids so that should be fun!). then working weds - thurs while kids with T; then off down to plymouth fri - sun to see my folks with the kids.
oh and wanted to ask your advice to see if you think i am being unrealistic...
J is 4 now. do you think he is too young to come along to my choir christmas concert - or at least the first half? the concert starts at 7.30pm (and he is ALWAYS in bed at 7pm). but i know how much he would LOVE to come and watch me sing, and there are congregational bits as well. and it is q light-hearted. i was wondering if i could get my mum, say, to stay at home and put E to bed, and bring J along to the concert with my dad. and then my dad takes him home at the interval (which will probably be after about 50 mins or so).
or do you think that would be unfair on him? i can't imagine he would sleep in the following morning, unfortunately, but it is a saturday night, so at least he wouldn't be tired at school the next day.
i have no doubt that he would sit through it open-mouthed with wonder. he is very good in the theatre / circus / cinema etc, so i wouldn't worry about him being badly behaved or disruptive.
I think S very hungry. She has just wolfed down a bowl of baby rice and looked for more as if I've been starving her poor love!! Lets hope we don't get 6am wake up tomorrow now!
Although Harry complaining of tummy ache, so maybe a fun night!!! NOT
MM - I started to wean Lexi at 5 months (to see if it helped the reflux) nothn too stuctured just occaisional cereal & veg getting ore serious with it as she reached 6 months. She is loving it and wolfing food down - unfortunately didn't help with the reflux though -just means it's all orange coloured now - yuk!
CM- I think you are a saint for putting up with his cr*p for as long as you have. Tthink the concert is a lovely idea & bet J loves it.
I am aching all over today due to shifting & stacking about a ton of wood last night -why did I do that 3 days before GSR?!!
I agree baby rice really rank. Think she just loves the fact that she is eating like the boys. I fed her while they had their tea, guess she just felt like she was joining in at last!!
Oh dear Chynah, hope you recover quickly...
JG- i suffered with thrush while breastfeeding and it was awful. I tried all the creams on me, nystan and gel stuff for Camryn's mouth and doc gave me fluconazole when it spread to my mlk ducts and I was in agony at every feed. Seen it described as being like razor blades being dragged through your milk ducts and that is how it felt. I spent every feed with tears streaming down my face, in fact I would be in tears before i started feeding just at the thought of the pain. Tried taking acidophillus from the health food shop too but in just kept reoccurring. Never had more then a week of pain free feeding and eventually gave up at 5 months.
CM- there is no doubt that T is a control freak but also sounds like he is not good at thinking on his feet and therefore doesn't like being 'confronted' with decisions, needs to go away and mull over what his reply is going to be. You probably are much better at thinking quickly and i imagine he is intimidated by that so uses aggressive tactics to buy himself time or just get away from the discussion altogether. Being a control freak he won't like any situation where he feels inferior to you. Sounds like you are doing everything you can to avoid face to face on the spot discussions i.e. texting and emailing, and he is still struggling with it, so not sure what else you can do. It is a shame that you are forced to get involved in these situations because of having to share nanny expenses etc, because it shouldn't really be your problem, it is him who is making it so.
Camryn seems to be on the mend, no vomiting since yesterday morn, but still not eating much. Have tried giving her rehydration sachets but not drinking much either. She's up and about though so that the main thing.
Almost finished my Xmas shopping, did a huge shop at Argos and a load of online shopping this morning and only got a few bits n bobs left to get. Now for the wrapping , every year I say I'm going to start wrapping early and do a few presents at a time and every year I end up sitting wrapping the whole lot over two nights and end up hardly able to move with a sore back.
Oh and CM, think J will love concert. One of my fondest memories of my eldest Nat was when she was eighteen months old I took her to a dance show that my teenage foster sister was dancing in and she loved it. We were right at the front and she was just completely absorbed in the dancing and music and she gave the loudest applause. Particularly lovely was when two children with down syndrome came on and did a ballet dance together (boy and girl) and at the end she started clapping and screaming with appreciation before anyone else in the audience got the chance (we were waiting for the music to stop completely) and the children were so happy as she so obviously loved their dance.
Just got home from a conference all day - very good, but tired now.
Just wanted to say MM - THE PLASTIC IKEA HIGH CHAIR IS THE BEST BEST BEST THING EVER!!!!! (and no they are not paying me commission) It is so easy to clean, it doesn't fold but it doesn't take up alot of space - in the summer we hose it down in the garden and just leave it outside to dry. We even bought 1 for the in laws and 1 for my dad too. M - being Miss Independent - now pushes a kitchen chair over to it so she can climb in and out on her own, she can do up the 'seat belt' (as she calls it), the only thing she can't do yet is undo the strap. The tray comes separately but we bought that too obviously. I've just found when I've been at friend's houses with ones with padding that they are so hard to clean, and we inherited an old fashioned wood one from someone but that wasn't great either. So what they lack for in attractiveness they more than make up for in functionality - and the price tag is good too!
Ok, I'll shut up now.
Haha I've been laughing at the thought of CM drinking breast milk!!!!
EF- if you have a short leuteal phase then I think they can give you something (progesterone maybe) to give your body a bit more time in case there is a potential pregnancy there. I only know because I have a short LP and was told about it when I went for IVF.
CM- the concert sounds great, Sure it would be a fab thing for J. Hubby still needs to get his head out of his a*se.
Karen- have a fab holiday, We are off to Bath soon. I was out-voted on centreparks so any ideas of what to do in early December with the kids much appreciated.
Louise- welcome to the thread. I have 3 boys, 20yrs, Tom 3.5 and Archie 2 next week.
JG- don't suffer with the thrush, go & see the GP, you are right to treat yourself & N but you may need something a bit stronger if it's persisting. You could also think about whether you are not clearing it or are you getting re-infected from somewhere (like a dummy/ breastpump)?
MM- Another ikea fan here- caro is so right about it being easy to clean and the legs do come off if you want to take it anywhere so it's not that bulky. Saying that MIL has a tripp trapp which is gorgeous but it is expensive & doesn't fold at all!
BRA's - I also thought the running bras were generous as I have creases in the cups but then my boobs are so small now my granny looks sexier than me....
glad i made you laugh, camlo. i am now laughing at the idea of your granny being sexier than you tho! until you tell me she is sophia loren or someone!
i should be in bed. have to find my way to abertillery tomorrow for a day of welsh language tuition starting at 9.15am. i am regretting my decision to do the course since i discovered it was for people who were having weekly welsh language classes - i most certainly am not!! i don't think i can rely on the fact that my degree was in modern and medieval languages, since i studied german and russian and from the very little i know of welsh it has nothing much in common with either of those languages... could be somewhat embarrassing.