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awwww -nice to see em get along
we unfortunately cant replace molly with kitten coz noah is clumsy hound
Any of you on Facebook might want to join the Aspergers Awareness Group - they post a question each day and seeing the responses from all of the world has certainly helped me to feel less isolated.
I also tend to focus a lot on negative stuff - a mindset I need to get out of - and reading all this other stuff is really helping me to focus on the positives.
I was really proud of LM yesterday. We had my Mum and her friend's grandson here for lunch. LM really funny about sitting next to other people and Mum sat on one sofa and Ben sat on the other. That would usually result in a tantrum but LM just decided it would be quite comfy on the floor. Such an improvement - it was lovely to have a relaxing lunch without any incidents.
It's true Hoose, you have to take everything into consideration when deciding on pets. I really felt Ollie wanted a friend around and his reaction to Jaffa has confirmed to me that my instincts were correct. He's such a naughty little kitten though! I've certainly got my work cut out for the next couple of months - it's like having a baby in the house again! So, for the time being, we've got to be really careful about making sure doors and windows are closed but ensuring Ollie still has the same amount of freedom - much easier said than done. Although Ollie likes Jaffa - I don't yet feel confident to leave them together when we're not around so they have to be separated - I need to ensure Jaffa doesn't bother Ollie to the extent that Ollie turns on him (he's already batted him a few times to let him know who's boss).
Boing!
Still can't work out why I'm not getting notifications - and the thread disappeared from my list. Ho hum.
Anyhow, glad things are getting better for you and LM.
Re school trips, No 1 Child didn't get on brilliantly while at primary school, missed them (by choice) until secondary, going last Sept at beginning of Yr 9. Generally got on OK, but he did get v stressed out by a lot of things, including having to pack bags to come home. He has his system (lists etc) which we can do at home, but which didn't work there - they all thought he was messing around and had a go at him.
But re skiing, we ski all three of us (and we're all Aspies) and my two got on brilliantly (much to my surprise given normal coordination probs etc), so might be possible for LM.
Anyhow, hope the moggies are well, couldn't see them on FB, but we have ginger and black toms, as you might have guessed from my pic.
Finally, finally, finally, FINALLY (sorry to copy you tweets) received a formal diagnosis today. LM has got Asperger's syndrome.
And I can beat you on length of time too tweety, it's 13 years since I suspected there was something different about LM and 4 years since I realised he probably had asperger's. I have been accused of being a neurotic mother, mollycoddling, spoiling/overindulging, neglecting and God knows what else along the way. It's been a long journey whereby I've felt isolated and have suffered from depression.
Finding others on here with some understanding of the issues has been a God send and kept me sane in some of my bleakest moments. Thank you.
NLP and TFT are working a treat but I have now spent nearly £1,000 on these. I've decided to apply for DLA to help to pay for this therapy. The difference is astounding. LM now walks from school to my work by himself (he was terrified of doing this before), he will go in shops on his own (ditto), he's not arguing with his teachers any more (having learned to shrug perceived injustices off more easily) and he isn't eating as much (which will hopefully lead to weight loss). He is also starting to make friends (nice ones) and spent a night at a friend's house last week. The parents thought LM was lovely - 'really polite' - not the usual feedback I get although of course I know that beneath the difficulties there is a truly lovely boy. I'm so pleased and delighted, it's been worth every penny of the £1,000.
Tweety, different strategies work for different children but a good one with LM (because he has a tendency to be oppositional, or at least he used to - not so sure now) is reverse psychology. If Tweety thought all you ever wanted her to do was sit on the computer, would she still want to?
Perhaps you could also (just an idea) try unplugging the mouse or the keyboard from the tower to render it useless and tell her it appears to be broken and you'll have to get it fixed (or is she smart enough by now to work that one out?). However, if it's become her 'special interest' of the moment, you might still get some difficulties, in which case you might have to try and find a new 'special interest' to occupy her. Good luck.
glad you have got some diagnosis=at least all treatment can be aimed correctly. Unfortunately in cases you get all sorts of crap and accusations flying from certain "experts". Hope your depression has lifted and you are getting some support when needed . So easy for mums to put themselves on back burner, though it makes no sense (as you are the vehicle of "caring" and so have to look after the vehicle -ie yourself. Please remember there are 2 people to look after here
take special care eh?
xx
thanks for the hints re. computer. her thing at the moment is the nintendo wii and she knows how to switch that on herself. we have taken to bargaining with her (if you are a good girl at school, you can play afterwards) which she doesn't like but i don't want her on it all day (she would do this if we let her.) her teacher says she would sit on the PC at school if they let her. they create a daily visual timetable with her where she chooses the things she can do during the day and she gets a limited time on each (teacher has got on of those giant egg timers for her.)
teacher told me that mini has taken to taking her underwear off and throwing it across the classroom! when told to put it back on yesterday, she put them on her head, said 'there you go!' and ran across the classroom. time for a social story, methinks......
LOL about her putting her underwear on her head ... that is so Aspergers! She did as she was told!!! LM once got told to sit down and so he sat on the floor when they really meant the chair. He was being difficult (as I suspect Mini was too) but there's a part of them that says that's okay as long as they have done what was asked.
LM's had a bad day today. He had a day off yesterday because he wasn't very well. Some group work was started without him and he was late joining because he didn't start until today. The rest of the group weren't very accepting of him and criticised everything he did and said until he couldn't take any more (where are the teachers when this happens?). LM lost it and shoved the table into one of the boys and then stormed out of the lesson.
He came home very unhappy - hated school, wasn't going there any more etc etc. However the recovery time from this was much quicker than usual and he's fine again now and has come up with his own strategy for coping tomorrow which doesn't involve any bad behaviour (thanks to NLP and TFT me thinks).
I don't know whether we'll be applying for a statement tweety. I'm not sure that he needs one. SENCO is reading through the diagnosis report to see what other support might be available. He has promised LM will be screened next year (along with every other pupil) to ascertain whether extra time is needed in exams (due to handwriting issues).
Ollie and Jaffa are wonderful. Jaffa's hard work. We let him out with some supervision. He climbs high trees and yowls at us to help him down when we can't. He terrorises Ollie and I have to protect Ollie from Jaffa. I then have to protect Jaffa from Ollie when Ollie's patience runs out LOL.
Right, we're expecting royalty tomorrow so I need to get on and steam clean my home. Actually it's just LM's friend but LM's quite anxious that he shouldn't see any of our mess. I therefore have about three hours in which to perform a miracle.
Tweety, I bought the 'All Cats Have Asperger Syndrome' book - it's lovely!
How are things?
How are you CJBA?
not so good at the moment. mini had an accident at school on wednesday. it appears she fell off the scooter and in falling forward she must have banged her chest on the handlebars (the teaching assistant only took her eye off her for a second) and the next thing she heard was screaming. she seemed ok when she got home (although she kept saying she had a tummy ache, meaning her chest). she asked for calpol before she went to bed but then woke up screaming at about midnight and we ended up taking her to A&E at 12.45am (yes, AM.) no problem with her lungs but the only thing we can give her is painkillers. she had a day off on thursday so she could have 4 hourly painkillers and some sleep (OH and i still went to work) went to school this morning but she fell over in the playground when she got there and got upset again, which in turn hurt her chest. had to leave work at 1pm as they wouldn't give her a spoonful of calprofen. what a pain in the backside.
apart from that, everything is fine!! the cat book is lovely, isn't it? i have signed up mini and me for the adidas women's challenge in september in hyde park. it was my first ever race many years ago and i think mini is old enough to keep her concentration to plod and walk 5k. it is £15 which i think is a bit steep for a 5k but £5 of the fee goes to a charity of your choice, so i have chosen NAS for both of us.
we are going to my parents tomorrow after mini's swimming lesson (assuming she is ok to swim.) she only has one of her own cats left now (the cats that don't technically live there, two of them, are not my mums.)
should really go to bed now, it probably won't be long before mini wakes up again...
look after yourself. is LM looking forward to half term?
Sorry Tweety. I've only just come back to this and so have only now seen about mini's accident. I hope she's feeling a lot better now. I suppose she would have been anxious taking a second fall, that it might result in another trip to A&E. LM has been very reluctant to get back into exercise since breaking his ankle last year - he's afraid of breaking his ankle again. He's gone off mountain boarding today. My guess is that he won't participate. I suppose all I can do is keep on giving him opportunities. He does get very scared of getting hurt. They were supposed to be going paint balling and he was stressing about that too. I'm sure he'll be okay and I only hope he isn't so miserable that he ruins it for others.
Have you enjoyed the half term? I've loved the weather the last couple of days. I've got loads of work that's supposed to be done before I get back to work on Monday. Doubt now that I will finish it as I'm out all day tomorrow.
Have you joined the Aspergers Awareness page on Facebook? It's very good. I'll try not to leave it a week before I pop back again. Sorry about that - first it was a friend here for the bank holiday, then it was just half term mayhem and all that comes with it. Back to some kind of normality from Monday.
Take care.
Boing!!
Just (hopefully) resurrected this page to say that I'm running in the Great South Run (October 25) and am raising money for the Hampshire Autistic Society.
I know that you don't know me and times are difficult financially for all of us. I hope that you won't be offended but as this thread is specifically about autism, I just wanted to let you know and to ask if anyone would be kind enough to donate to my local charity.
http://www.justgiving.com/Aspie-on-the-run/
This is my page, details of our story are on there. If you do feel that you would like to make a donation, then thank you very much.
Hope everyone is getting on well.
Carol