Things you want to say but can't

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Comments

  • Barley, he's just a bored price c**k who used to call himself "Heath Hunk". 

    He is Mark Derry who runs for London Heathside http://www.londonheathside.org.uk/our_club/main/index.php who claim to be "North London's friendliest running and athletics club" and I'm sure they must be very very proud of him... image

    The ignore function works perfectly... as long as people stop quoting him...

  • You really need to breathe NLR - Woooo saaaa. Perhaps you should re-read your post before accusing others of labelling???

    do you want a cuddle?

  • North London Runner wrote (see)
    Barlist- I looked up twat in my pictoral dictionary and your silly yellow shirted pic came up! Like the Spanish (thhhorisso lol) I have to explain things very slowly to you all. If I only had time to educate you lot but then you wouldnt be so funny. Ignore away Tabitha. Go label some more people JW like your parents used to.
    Eh?  I think the fact you don't comment on my posts means you agree with me, and can't slag me off because you know i'm right!  image  I bet you ain't more edumacated than most of us in here anyway, so don't worry about not having the time.  You could use that extra time to work on your astounding repartee....you need it image
  • Dear Mega Bus - there might have been delays on the M4 but did you really think that going THROUGH Bristol at 10.00am would be quicker!!!  I don't drive and even I knew better than that.  It wasn't was it and I didn't appreciate having to virtually leg it across London to get an interview with not time to tidy hair or makeup
  • Good luck in the interview!  Hope it goes / went well image
  • Ta - I either aced it or scared them - will know tomorrow

  • Dear clothes manufacturers - it may have escaped your noticed but the variation in womens shapes if sort of larger then the variation in mens.  We usually pay higher prices so why can't you accomodate the different shapes.  I am sick of looking 5 sizes bigger because you don't cut clothes to include that very female asset - boobs.  Alternatively buttons shoot people in the eye as they pop under the strain.  People always tell me I have lost alot of weight when they see me in fitted clothes for the first time - I am not apple shaped I am in Goks words a top heavy hourglass and would like to see that in teh mirror more often than I do
  • To the people who burgled my friend last night.  I hope you get what you deserve!
  • Stop eating the chocolates lady! You're already pretty much circular!  Everytime I sit in this office you talk about your endless ailments and you're always out at one doctors' appointment or another. Losing a little weight will definitely help, craming chocolate after chocolate into you cats-bum mouth won't.
  • Dear wardrobe

    I owe you an apology, I have found the brown skirt I accused you of eating.
  • Please Mr 43 year old Meff who shares a house with me,

    No, it isn't really acceptable to throw the microwave away because you can't be arsed to clean up the tomatoes you exploded in it. Also, I put that food in that bowl there so I had it ready to add to what I was cooking, at the right moment, not so you could stick your piss covered hands in it to use it for yourself, without asking. Wipe the surface after you've used it. Do your trousers up. Put rubbish in the bin, not on it. Don't leave your dirty dishes in the sink so I have to move them to wash my stuff up. You are disgusting and I'm glad you crashed your car into the sister of a policeman this week. It's a shame you didn't injure yourself properly. No, you're not getting any sympathy because you're a dirty, childish cock.

  • Dear car manufacturer of my shit car.

    Please make the horn easier to honk because now I have to drive in city centre rush hour traffic every morning I need it to work when some tw*t cuts me up.
  • Oh and dear Chuggers.....

    http://rlv.zcache.com/piss_off_card-p137078108658349100q0yk_400.jpg

  • Bloody hell Blisters, he sounds divine!

    What's a MEFF by the way?

  • ANTB - Him!......is the short answer. It's a scouse word, innit LB?! It means someone who's unkempt and undesirable.
  • Dear chavs who invaded my local for the evening.

    Firstly, asking you to shut the door is not unreasonable behaviour.  An answer of "sorry" and going back to close it, would have been fine..

    On the fourth occasion when another regular got up and closed it rather forcefully, you might have got the point.  When I got up the next time and slammed it rather hard, it really should have impinged on even your dim brain that someone was trying to get a message to you.

    The wall of un-necessary comments when we gave up and left is what we might have expected, and I understand that you don't know any better.  However, jumping out in front of the car really was a step too far.  Luckily for you I swerved away from you rather than towards you, but only because running you over would have spoiled my whole evening and possibly damaged my bumper

    Innit?   So I was like..... and he was like..... and I was like...... and I went...... and then he went......

  • Many thanks B&B
  • Late afternoon receptionist, I do not want to stand by your desk, listening to you droning on about your kids and your health and how you couldn't go running. I am not interested in you at all. I just have to sign out every evening and if i say i need to go running, it's because I need to go running. It is not an excuse or a cover-up for a date. You are a pest and making me hate my job. And being about 2 stone underweight is not a good look. 
  • Dear runner, I know that you are much faster than me, and that you are taking part to keep your pal company, but do you have to run much faster than her, and then jog on the spot to wait for her to catch up.
  • and also to TV chef. It's not Brushetta, you ignorant git
  • Dear work colleague with the self diagnosed laryngitis.

    Thanks a fecking bunch you thoughtless wassock, I appear to be coming down with a sore throat and accompanying chest infection. Not sure if my "glands" are swollen, as I had them removed earlier this year. However, after you insisted on me looking down your throat, a pleasure I'd rather have avoided, I'm familiar with the state and functionality of yours.

    PS why not try stopping smoking, it'll make you less suscebtible to every infection going. b!+ch

  • This is my favourite thread in the world! I am a grumpy bitch on a good day!

  • Dear CNN, being a long way from home and having only you to watch on the telly is something of a trial.

    Take your rolling news agenda, your blow-dried big-gobbed harpies blethering on about stock prices, your corporate vanity ads which kid on they give something to the world when really they'd turn people into dog food if they thought they could get away with it, and also your intense focus on items of no f8ckin interest outside of a small number of people in the political village...take all of that, ram it up your arse and just f*ck off out of my life forever.

  • JB - applause for 'harpies', Excellent insult
  • Dear group of childminders.....................before taking the kids to a toddlers group can you please try and learn basic facts.......for the enrolement.............like dOB..................or even their names would be nice..how can you look after kids without even knowing the names...............image

    and whilst Mums, dads and nans and granddads, go around the room playing with the little ones and joining in the singing session with the kids.............................why do everyone of you spend the whole morning stuck on your arses talking....................and only ever move them to get the tea and biscuits................

    I would never ever use a childminder after seeing the attention you group of 7/8 give the children........

  • Dear person that cannot tell you anything about anything without regaling some oh-so-interesting (in your eyes) related story, please stop.  Why can't you just answer the question in a straightforward manner?  It seems highly unlikely that you have a related story to tell about virtually every topic under the sun - if you did, surely you'd me MUCH more successful in life than you currently are?  I still struggle to understand why people are so enthralled with your arrogant, 'look at me and worship me i'm so wonderful!' musings, but there are some daft folk out there.  The next time you leave, please don't come back; you're doing nothing but getting my hopes up, and I really do hate to see them dashed so...
  • image hahahahahaha!

    Something i did get off my chest today that i thought I would share, driving to work, at a crossing, light was red, just turned amber and 3 kids (about 13) started sauntering across, got past the car next to me and lights were green so he slowly moved off, one kid just mooched past my car snail speed, I gestured to her to move on and she just looked at me with a smirk on her face so i smacked on my horn BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP "MOVE"..........I've never seen anyone jump so high or move so quick!!! Very funny, made my day and i'm sure it made her more alert as well!

  • Dear stand-in Yoga lady,

    Our lovely, regular Yoga lady undestands that some of us are not quite as young or flexible as we would like to  be and may choose to leave out or adapt certain positions to suit our own particular creaky bits, so when I refused to do a shoulder stand I meant it and shouldn't have needed to tell you twice.

    Oh and thanks for the aching shoulders this morning from keeping us too long in plank and downward dog.

  • JWrun wrote (see)

    image hahahahahaha!

    Something i did get off my chest today that i thought I would share, driving to work, at a crossing, light was red, just turned amber and 3 kids (about 13) started sauntering across, got past the car next to me and lights were green so he slowly moved off, one kid just mooched past my car snail speed, I gestured to her to move on and she just looked at me with a smirk on her face so i smacked on my horn BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP "MOVE"..........I've never seen anyone jump so high or move so quick!!! Very funny, made my day and i'm sure it made her more alert as well!


    You know what i'm talking about, girlfriend! image

    Hilarious re mooching kids, she'll not do that again! hee hee hee

  • You need to look up the word 'dignity'

    It's in between 'desperate' and 'dull' in the dictionary...
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