Things you want to say but can't



  • How many times do I have to tell you the same thing, in slightly different ways, before you finally understand it?  Keeping asking won't make it suddenly change to something else.  The answer is still the same, and might still be helped by the suggestions I made 3 months ago.
  • Hi Corinth (waves) image

    Dear people on escalators - stand on the fecking right! Even if you no speak da English you can see how the etiquette works with your own eyes. It is a sublimely simple, effective and inclusive system designed to suit lazy arses and non lazy arses alike.

    Conform or expect to have "EXCUSE ME!" bellowed very loudly in your ear as people like me try to get past you.

    Gracias/Obrigada/Danke etc. etc....

  • GAHHHH! I hate the way you talk, i hate the way you laugh, i hate the way you walk and the way your head tilts to the left, i think you are false and looking down your nose at anyone with less experience than you is not a nice trait, you're crap at your job and only got to where you are cos you've been here so damn long, go anywhere else and you wouldn't stand a chance - the best thing about that is, you bl**dy know it, which makes me smile.

    YOU SUCK (and you have bad hair!)

    I really don't hate anyone fyi - but the person i'm talking about is a tit!

  • (Some) cyclists of Bristol - get off the f*ckin' pavements!  Why are you on them when there's a perfectly good road alongside, often quiet and with a cycle lane.  I've been knocked off by a car but I still continue to cycle on the roads because that's what they're there for.  Pavements are for pedestrians - they're marginalised enough with cars parking on the pavements; having to wait an eternity at road crossings and generally playing second-class citizens to the mighty petrol-guzzlers.
  • GNR organisers, it's very sweet of you to text our times once we've finished, but your email instructions for how to set the service up are rubbish: go to the Great Run homepage and from the SMS registration page...There is no SMS registration page listed on the home page! You have to click on the link, which I didn't particularly want to do because I was reading the email on my phone. Either say "click on this link" or give the full address details, don't be vague and confusing!

    There was me thinking I wouldn't need this thread today.

  • AllNewTB wrote (see)

    There was me thinking I wouldn't need this thread today.

    AYE RIGHT! image I think we all have to accept that rants will never end, but at least now we have somewhere to shove them image

    *tilts head back to the right and checks hair in mirror* image


  • Dear Tesco Scone baker

    I'm sure your scones are probably full of all kinds of additives and guff, but boy was that tasty. Mmm mmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.  Keep up the good work.

    Yours appreciatively,

    The Pea

    p.s. I would, in fact, say that to someone's face, but i'm not sure who to say it to image

  • Don't come down here and expect me to jump at your request! I am Bl**dy busy at the moment mainly dealing with other people's ***fups and you KNOW this, so don't bob up at my desk, expect me to drop everything to give you information you ALREADY HAVE and then ask me whats' wrong.......nothings wrong but you seem to take delight in winding me up and I am very busy today. Leave me to get on with this and all will be well!!

    Chuff me I'm glad i'm not working in this office tomorrow.

  • I'm gonna hate saying this because the person is lovely but it's how I really feel and I know they would be devestated if I told them in person.

    While I appreciate the fact that you're really excited that me & son have bought our first house together, I don't think it's appropriate that you come and stay with us for 2 weeks so soon after we've moved in. We are a young couple & this is our special time to enjoy our new house just the two of us. I know you feel left out because the rest of our families have been involved, but you did leave the country & there is only so much involvement you can have.

    I know your son will always be your little baby but you need to realise that he is an adult & we have a life together now. You got to go through your these sort of experiences, so please let us enjoys ours.

    This 'guest-free' period will also apply to when we are newly-weds and new parents. I still want you to be involved in our lives, but please do not suffocate us.

  • No, my dear, I do not think that some half price fit flops will tone your legs.  I think getting off your backside and walking might.  You only live 1.5 miles from work, you could walk here or cycle along those nice cycle paths.  Or alternatively you could give up your breakfast bar of chocolate.

    I know I wear fit flops, my dear, but that's because they are comfy and suit my feet meaning I don't get nasty eczema on the soles - I have no idea why as it's not part of the marketing blurb but please don't imply that we're the same.
  • Ha!  So how are you going to get out of that one, K8?
  • Oh k8, been there done it. Its very irritating but just try and think of all the very many weeks after she/he has been and you can enjoy the rest of your time together, think of it this way, at least it will be out of the way. image
  • Dear driver of the very nice car i had reason to have a word with today.

    No home insurance does not cover you to drive in the UK. I don't care if you are a careful driver or not, you need motor insurance.

    And thank you for complaining to my guvnor about me a few hours later....for doing my job.

  • K8 - my mother came to stay with me and OH when we'd been living together for a week. It was summer, my mother sleeps naked and kept the bedroom door open, OH got an eye-full one morning. I still shudder with embarrassment when I think about it.

    Also, day after our wedding, his parents came to stay with us as they were staying in our flat while we were on honeymoon.

    You have my sympathy. xx 

  • I got told at the start of the week that we would be having a guest while at work (over internet chat). I spent the whole day worrying about telling my bf as I didn't want him to think I didn't like his mother. I planned what I was going to say the whole way home and then started to tell him, he then turned around and said she couldn't afford to fly over for the time being - I had been saved!!

    I told him how I felt anyway just in case it changed again. That was a few days ago but it's still been my thinking topic while I'm out running. Good to get it out on here and I didn't think I would be the only one who has had a similar thing happen!

  • On a less sensitive note:

    Maybe I would feel bad for you what with being pregnant & being suspended from work if you weren't such a BITCH to me a few years back.

    Ha, karma does work!

  • My parents drove down with furniture the day after we moved into our flat. (We're in Devon, they're in Lancashire) They arrived at about 6:30 and parked at the back. Hubby sleeps naked and my parents had the curtains in their van...
  • You've been irresponsible with money all your life, spending beyond your means, always thinking the world owes you a living.  You've borrowed money countless times from other people and never pay it back, you've got debts........ and I really do not want to 'lend' (ie give) you any money and I hate being emotionally blackmailed into it. image
  • Dear job place for FFS tell me.  You were supposed to tell me by yesterday but I haven't heard either way and since your interviews were a week later than planned so I had already given up when you invited me down I can't quite let it go and its a job I really wanted......................

    Let me out of this sodding limbo

  • Look, I know I've got a massive cock and I am dynamite in bed, but sometimes I need a break.  Alright?
  • Vicky - can you not just say - "sorry, I'm really hard up at the moment and have nothing to spare"?

    (Or "if you had ever paid me back previous loans, I would have some cash to lend you this time!)
  • Great TOTP, Coops  image
  • Maddy, I had a job interview like that.  Had given up when they send out the interview request weeks late, then I never, ever heard one way or another, despite chasing it up.  The interview was november 2008.  I think it's so rude, as they had asked me to prepare a presentation for it, and i'd had to travel from Cumbria to Warrington, which I did not get any money back for.  Arrrgh!
  • Well at least I got my travel expenses back Angel

    Its frustrating as if I do get through I know I will need to move really fast

    I had one last year where they shouldn't have interviewed me since I didn't have a car licence (the manager had missed that bit) judging by the looks on their faces when it came up, the interview was going very well up until that point - I definately should have got my travel expenses back for that one and yes I had to prepare a presentation as well for it

  • Dear Car Dealership,

    When I asked you when the car would be ready I expected an honest answer.  Any time was OK with me, I just wanted to know so that I could plan the rest of my day.  Telling me that it would be ready for 3pm meant that I planned to collect the car before going for a run.

    I was not impressed when I turned up at 3:15pm to be told that you had hardly started and I would need to wait anohter 20 min.  I was even less impressed when I eventually left 90 min later with an unexpectedly large bill and having missed the oportunity for a run.

    Do you not know how to read a clock or are you just a liar?

  • Dear OAP who parked their Micra next to me today.... next time can you leave a can opener so I can get in the bloody door.
    Dear Fat supermarket shopper the parent and child and disabled bays are named that for a reason, not for your convenience, you wouldn't have so much trouble walking if you lost a few pounds.....
  • Wilkie wrote (see)
    Vicky - can you not just say - "sorry, I'm really hard up at the moment and have nothing to spare"? (Or "if you had ever paid me back previous loans, I would have some cash to lend you this time!)
    I'd be lying if I said I was really hard up, so perhaps the 2nd one!  I'm cross because I think someone approaching 40 should be taking more responsibility for themselves.
  • Dear absolutely fantastic woman at tescos today with your neckline plunging into fabulous bosoms,perfectly shaped body, alluring smile and smelling of sexiness

    Please dont go shopping on a friday again

    I was slyly admiring you when my good lady wife pointed out you had no draws on under you slinky body hugging, office dress.

    I had to look and go "tsk, tsk shouldnt be allowed" etc I a  convincing way

    Got away with image

  • Vicky - you don't know my brother by any chance - he is approaching 40 and keeps getting bailed out (but not by me before Wilkie appears image)
  • Maddy. wrote (see)

    Dear job place for FFS tell me.  You were supposed to tell me by yesterday but I haven't heard either way and since your interviews were a week later than planned so I had already given up when you invited me down I can't quite let it go and its a job I really wanted......................

    Let me out of this sodding limbo

    Know how you feel, I've been told I have the job but still no firm offer and the interview was 4 weeks ago, and also really want this job as it means I can stop travelling to London and work local for the same money.

    We can't all be related to my brother image he is 49 and still ponces of me, although he hasn't for the last year as last time I saw him said it would be nice if he could start paying me back, could be why I haven't seen him then.

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