Crap at relationships

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  • Tickled Pink wrote (see)

      Do you think she just see's life on the other side of the fence with partner/family as a lot easier?

    I honestly think that it has to do with the fact that I became a granny this year - (I'm one year younger than my sister and I've been married for 23 years and we have three nearly grown up children) we're a really close family and the grandbaby has made us really happy - my sister sees us quite a bit and she sees how we are together - I really think she thinks that she's missed her opportunity to have kids and a partner.

    I also think it's more the baby thing that unsettles her more than a relationship.  Whole other thread I guessimage

  • I wasn't a cat person when I was on my own - chances of getting spliced decline in inverse proportion to number of cats owned.

    i think this is one of the first laws of relationships - infallible and provable empirically.

  • Johnny Blaze wrote (see)

    I wasn't a cat person when I was on my own - chances of getting spliced decline in inverse proportion to number of cats owned.

    i think this is one of the first laws of relationships - infallible and provable empirically.


    Cats "owned" ?

    Cats are not owned. They may patronise one's establishment occasionally

  • gingerfurball wrote (see)
    Tickled Pink wrote (see)

      Do you think she just see's life on the other side of the fence with partner/family as a lot easier?

    I honestly think that it has to do with the fact that I became a granny this year - (I'm one year younger than my sister and I've been married for 23 years and we have three nearly grown up children) we're a really close family and the grandbaby has made us really happy - my sister sees us quite a bit and she sees how we are together - I really think she thinks that she's missed her opportunity to have kids and a partner.

    I also think it's more the baby thing that unsettles her more than a relationship.  Whole other thread I guessimage

    Yeah that is a shame image  The more i see all my friends getting married and having kids, the less it makes me worry about whether i've run out of time kids wise, which I guess is lucky.  I'm happy to have nieces and friends with kids.  One of my other single friends is the opposite; she's devastated she may never have kids, and that is such a shame, because it is affecting her entire happiness.  I'd like to get married though.  Just need to find someone mad enough! image
  • Johnny Blaze wrote (see)
    Not the dog in the photo btw - he is an "Anonymous Dog" whose pic I got off the internet.


    I thought I should make that clear in case anyone was wondering, which they wouldn't be, obviously.

    Hahahahaha!!!

  • MikeFrog Justgiving.com/MikeforCrisis wrote (see)
    Johnny Blaze wrote (see)

    I wasn't a cat person when I was on my own - chances of getting spliced decline in inverse proportion to number of cats owned.

    i think this is one of the first laws of relationships - infallible and provable empirically.


    Cats "owned" ?

    Cats are not owned. They may patronise one's establishment occasionally

    Cats don't have owners... they have staff!  image
  • I'm kind of chuckling at the term "emotional flatliners"... imageimage  I'm much more highly strung than my man, but then I could NEVER go out with a male equivalent of myself...!  image

    The marrying your sister thing totally threw me.  Am I missing something here?  Surely that's illegal??  image

  • gingerfurball wrote (see)

    I wonder if the thing about people who are long term single is if people look at them and wonder what is the deal with them - eg: my sister is 46 and to my knowledge has had a relationship/boyfriend in her whole life.  Up to, I would say, this past year that suited her to the ground....very happily single and child free.

    Now however she is desperate for a relationship - desperate for a child - but I wonder if prospective partners would look at her and wonder what is "wrong with her to have not had a relationship before (I'm not sure if I'm articulating this very well....image

    I can see how that might work but I don't think most men would really worry about that - I could be wrong.   

    I know a few people (apart from the guy who lacked confidence I mentioned earlier) who to my knowledge have never had a relationship - or not in the last decade or two anyway - I just assume they are either gay but not out or else they are just asexual .   Though one of them has just got married after meeting a woman at work last year - he's early 50s - never lacked confidence with women and would always joke with them in a flirty way just never seemed to get together with them until now.  

    Him and another guy I'm thinking of are/were both really good cyclists putting in easily 300 miles a week and people always joke they are married to the bike.   

  • image Half sister perhaps?
  • I do know one thing - if being single is making you unhappy then you should try and change that - people "generally" like to be around positive people, innit, and if you behave more sunnily then you improve your chances of getting dirty rabbit sex.

    Erm, I mean "of having a long term stable relationship".

  • Look how happy I am imageimageimage now JB ... you promised image
  • DRS on the NHS?

    I'd buy that for a dollar!image

  • Dirty rabbit sex!! Love it image Hee hee hee

    There is nothing more off putting that someone that is miserable right enough. I'm not miserable in being single I have to say, I'm really happy with my life right now, i'm just slightly gagging for it image image
  • It is hard to meet people though. I've got lots of long term single female friends, I'm a relatively new member of the celibacy and the city gang, and we all go out a lot, aren't miserable or desperate and generally have enjoyable lives. However none of us ever meet single men. One friend is internet dating at the moment and is experiencing the age problem - she's 38 and is attracting men who are approaching 60. I'd rather get a cat...
  • As i said it may sound strange but what I miss is doing nothing with someone I've got plenty of friends to keep busy with and have an active life when away from work but I would like the situation to change and have someone a bit more premanent .
  • I totally misread the initial post about being in work more than a junior doctor. image

    But definitely it is better to be single and happy than moaning in a relationship. I do worry I've ruined myself now with years of indulgence of purely my choice!  image

  • That's not strange Slowfoot. Sometimes it is just about being with so comfortable with someone you can just be with them, and you don't need to be doing anything image It's as much about what isn't said or done as what is. Having company when you're just 'living' is nice, and I miss that too.
  • Me three....it needs to be with a special person though and they are not always that easy to find image

  • Yep, just being comfortable enough with someone to do nothing is fab.
  • Religion isn't the opiate of the people... it's bleedin Mills and Boon!
  • I really have to stop reading this thread just before bedtime - I get all depressed and start feeling sorry for myself and everyone else who's lonely....image

    I definately support the 'doing nothing' with someone thing..... I miss that too. No matter how full and busy your life is, nothing can make up for just hanging out with someone and chilling. 

  • image Just because your hanging out with someone and chilling doesn't meen they have to be anything other than a friend Lisa. What happens happens just be happy. image (((hugs alround)))
  • Its a bit tricky to do the whole lazing in bed on a Sunday morning picking bits of toast out of your pjs with somebody who's just a friend though Cake. 

    Have got my arms warmed up and ready for a hug Slowfoot.  image

    I have to say this thread is really making me appreciate Mr CS...  ((((hugs to everyone))))

    One of my friends has been single for a while and although I'd say she's more outgoing than me doesn't seem to put herself out there even though she says she wants a relationship.  I am getting from you lot though that this whole dating thing is harder than I remember.  I thought it was just a case of talking to enough people in your circle of mutual interests and eventually one of them will talk back to you.  She has said she doesn't want to kiss any more frogs which to me is limiting your choices, you can't judge somebody purely on how they look... there is more to the book than the front cover....

  • image I agree Cake.

    I don't necessarily miss the 'doing nothing' thing with someone because I'm a very active person.  In my last relationship, the OH was a bit of a 'doing nothing' type bloke and this was one of the reasons we split up.  Although it's taken me a long time to come to the realisation, I now know I need to find a partner I've got a fair few things in common with, rather than go for someone I just completely fancy.  My last OH was a lovely person and we did have some things in common but not enough for us to have proper shared quality time together that I could see lasting into the future and keeping us both happy long-term.

  • Depends what 'doing nothing' means I suppose.  To some peole that means literally sitting on the sofa watching telly but to others it means not doing anything planned, just thinking of stuff to fill a Sunday afternoon.  How I term it is that I'd quite like somebody to play with. image

    Things in common are good, if not essential, but people need to keep their own interests and their own lives.  Somebody with an interest in running ... fine ... somebody who wants to go running with me ... no thanks, we'd argue and anyway that's my thinking time. 

  • Yeah I guess that's what it means to me too TP, I rather like just doing whatever crops up, chatting and getting to know more stuff about the person

    I like scheduled outing too, just if that's all there is and you can't be comfortable in the other person's company without some laid on entertainment then I'm not sure that's a good basis for a relationship

  • CazSoul wrote (see)

    She has said she doesn't want to kiss any more frogs

    I get that a lot image
  • That's because Womble found her prince Mike

    *passes bucket for those with delicate tummies*

  • Oh puh-leeeeze
  • You asked for that Mike. image
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