Mental illness and running

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  • Ah, thanks SOLB.  Getting emotional now.

    Well I'm off to do my shopping in a bit.  Friday night is wine and chocolate permitted without feeling guilty night.  I heard somewhere that the calories don't count as much so long as you don't feel guilty - oh, yes I was talking to myself at the time!  Not sure it's really deserved after the 'purple ones' raid but that's my end of week treat that I allow myself.

  • Oh and well done on getting your run in by 'eck.  So much going on - can't keep up.

  • LR, looking after people is important.  Its amazing what a differencce a couple of words or a text can make when you are feeling down.  What you did for your friend is special and important, however little it is.

    Go and eat your chocolate.  Given that I've had a Mars bar, half a tin of Roses, some Chocolate Torte and a pizza today, and I'm now consuming wine, I think your 'purple ones' raid is acceptable.

    Yesterday I only ate some left over lasagne and drank tons of coffee. I'm not sure which is the more nutritionally balanced diet.

  • Caz, I think with the week you've had you shouldn't worry too much about your diet.  There will be better time ahead to get that back on track.

    I think karma paid me a visit in the supermarket as I'd got a piece of cheese which wouldn't scan nor was the code recognised so the guy just put it in my bag and said 'Merry Christmas - don't tell anyone I did that'.  Oops, I just did!

    Wine's a chilled now.  Green and Blacks was on special offer - I'm not normally that extravagant.  Friday night treat time!

  • LR, I think you have just earned yourself an honorary place on the Mundane thread image

  • Just checked that out as I'd not heard of it.  Looks like it's been out of use for some time but I notice that someone got told off on there for not being mundane by saying she had lasagne for breakfast - so I can't say you qualify as well. image

  • Just to say that I love this thread and its restored my faith in the forum  

    And there's nothing mundane about it, even if it is getting cheesey image

    I've just got back from a Greek restaurant where I've drunk far too much Retsina. 

    Love peace and happiness.

    Night all.

    x

     

  • Hey, party animal, TSD.

    My bottles empty too soon - but it's a happier Friday night than I've had for quite some time.

    Take care xxx

  • Awww happy (slightly squiffy) friends image 
     

  • Time for some sleep then in the morning restore this dumping ground of mine into a civilised home.  Gonna dream of my world domination plan.

      Hope you get some sleep SOLB. xxxx

  • Thanks, I'm off to bed now I've got to leave the house at 7 so I should have gone already ... especially as I look a bit zombieish already but I wanted to finish something first for a friend first image 

  • Morning. My head hurts and I don't even remember posting that last night. image

  • Well, I'm sure you meant every word - particularly about me not being mundane. image

    I'm just grateful for the 500ml wine bottle - keeps consumption within my headache free limit!

  • I stuck to 2 glasses last night, and spent most of the evening exchanging banter on FB with a few close friends.  Exactly what I needed

    The conversation turned to snow at Christmas and I had a flash back of shovelling snow in my nightshirt when I was 17.  That was my dads way of punishing me for being me.  Embarass me by showing the neighbours that I'm a person of disrepute by showing me off in the front garden.  I'd suppressed that memory for a long time.

    Today I am fighting my demons by spring cleaning the house

  • Oh Caz that's terrible.  More hugs - ((((((Super Caz))))))

    I think it is important you're coming out with these things though after mostly lurking.  There must more like this in your past so which means it's so easy for something to act as a trigger to bring you crashing down.  I do think there's something really special going on here so I do think you've now properly 'joined the gang' and there's a real chance for us all to grow stronger together.  There's a whole of demons around that are in for a rough ride. They certainly won't have expected coming under attack from spring cleaning just one day after the shortest day!

  • LR, I originally started lurking as there is someone on this thread that is very dear to me.  Sometimes she went quiet on me and I used to worry, but often she would post on here when she was unable to communicate in the real world, so I knew that she was alright.

    Its only after reading stuff that other people have put on here, and through talking to other people face to face that I began to realise that how I had been treated wasn't normal.  I knew I didn't have the best relationship with my dad, but not all families are close and we can't chose who our parents are.

    Even now I sometimes wonder whether I am over reacting to a clash of personalities rather than anything more serious, but it is responses like yours that make me see that I'm not making a mountain out of a molehill.

    In some ways it would be easier if he had laid a finger on me.  That is clear cut abuse and I wouldn't be questioning it in the same way

  • Caz, thanks that makes things a lot clearer re the lurking.  I think you face some big decisions about how you will face your relationship with your father in future.  Only you can make that decision and you need to take the time to come to the right decision for you.  The other thing is how past events continue to affect you.  Hopefully you can find ways to stop what's gone before continuing to hurt you.  There'll certainly be plenty of support on here with that for a start.

  • SC, that is appalling abuse. Yup, I do mean abuse
  • SC - you have described shocking abuse, there is no other word for it. I know what you mean though about thinking you are over reacting. I've been doing that it took counselling to make me realise that I wasn't misinterpreting what was blatant bullying It was only then that I could really get the most from CBT. I was putting it all down to thinking errors and driving myself potty that I couldn't turn round the negative thoughts. That led me on to looking at deeper beliefs along the lines of what does it mean to me if someone is rude and thoughtless?  It shouldn't bother me when it says more about the bully than it does about me , but its taking some work for me to really believe that myself rather than just an empty positive thought.. I'll get there though and you will too. 

  • I'll be out running tomorrow at our orienteering club annual handicap event.  This means I'll be meeting all the people that I 'came out' to since sending the e-mail.  Of course, everyone's bound to be just great.  Only concern is that if everyone's a bit too nice I might get emotional.  It will be interesting to see how it feels to be among people who know what's going on with me.  I'm hopeful it will prove beneficial.  Hopefully might help me run better as well.

    Anyone else out for a run?

  • Good luck LR. I'm sure it will go well. We all seem to struggle with people being nice to us - something we need to accept easier I think. 

    I might take a plod tomorrow. Mr Soup is running Portsmouth marathon but I'm not going on account of the wet weather, so no excuse really. 

  • Yes, of course people being nice has got to be good - just too many being too nice in one go could set me off. 

    Hope your plod goes OK.  I would also avoid the marathon, not because of the weather but because it's a marathon.  It's a long term goal of mine though.  First goal is a half marathon for next year.  It was a goal for this year but obviously there have been a few 'issues'.

  • Caz - it's taken me over 24 hours but I think I've got it.

    SuperCaz wrote (see)

    LR, I think you have just earned yourself an honorary place on the Mundane thread image

    T-shirts with 'Team mundane.  We like cheese' comes to mind.  Am I on right lines?  I probably came out with some total nonsense last night but hey when the wine's flowing that tends to happen anyway.

  • Wow big day on the thread! Seems I've missed a lot! Massive, massive hugs to all in need (and all not in need really!)



    Will be awaiting news on how it goes tomorrow LR - hope it's really nice but not image really nice - totally get what you mean!



    I've been with friends today I image friends, hadn't really had them up until about 18 months ago image



    TSD I have SOLBsisminimini's baptism in the morning but I'd like to try a really short run tomorrow afternoon - we could be soggy, cold & happy runners together if you like image



    I'm feeling grateful for you all tonight
  • Oh and LR that's the one!
  • I have just found the proper 'mundane thread' though.  I found a different one last night that was abandoned about 3 years ago. 

    Right, got to be good and get some sleep now.  Glad you had a good day today SOLB and hope tomorrows good too.

    Nite xx

  • Morning. Its actually stopped raining here. 

    Hope the baptism goes well Solb. 

    I have to say I have never bothered to look at the Mundane thread lol. Perhaps I should. 

    I've been invited to a friends place for lunch which still leaves me time for a plod but I'm struggling with motivation. I wasn't going to run the marathon (I wish I had the fitness), just support Mr over the line but I'm not standing around for 4+ hours or more in the freezing cold and rain. Its not as if its his first one so he doesn't mind - its his 41st! Mad. 

    Hmmm - it looks very windy, I'm tempted to do a bike turbo session instead of a run. 

     

  • Morning Soupy, don't think the exercise fairies will be cross if you turbo instead of run.

    41st? :-O thats incredible!



    I really don't want to go this morning. Hating the thought of all those people and for some reason being in church always makes me cry. Not in a flooded spirit full of love kinda way in a people are tearing my heart apart with their bare hands kind of way.



    I'd better launch myself into the day, I'm already running late!
  • I hope the exercise fairies will also agree to my latest idea. I'm going to spend the morning planning out a training schedule. On every day I'm putting down a plan A, a plan B for when motivation dips/life/weather gets in the way and highlighting key sessions that I shouldn't miss come what may, and some rewards for achievements along the way.  I've set myself some ambitious goals for next year that aren't going to happen if I don't get organised. So..........diary at the ready, kettle on, lets start planning. image

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