Mental illness and running



  • We stock around 12 different types of tea including rooibos earl grey (delicious), peppermint, lemon &ginger and pomegranate
  • Excellent.  If only I could get the time off work, I'd be there!

  • If I were in any way practical I would be there. Sadly I am useless at all things practical.

  • I am a wuss. I have a cold and dont want to do anything except curl up on the sofa and listen to my CD.
  • That's the only sensible thing to do when you have a cold.  Life around us really should be able to stop so that we can do that when stuck with a cold.


  • Children dont stop sadly.

    Today moo had his speech and language assessment. Like all good children he barely spoke, almost completely ignored her (until the last 5 minutes) and was totally absorbed in opening the hidden sockets. Oh, and took a plate with him (!). She wants to do some more research into his medical history, talk to some of his people, and also look at how the NG tube could affect his speech if that is where we end up. And see him again. Ironically, his next appt is in our town on the same day as we were offered for an initial assessment with a woman who wasn't very nice to me, didn't connect with Michael, and only saw people in a town that isn't terribly easy to get to. So glad I spoke really nicely to the team secretary about seeing someone else.
  • Made it to the running club run tonight.  Ran fairly well so was pleased with that.  Not quite so good though was having to fight with a lot of really bad stuff going on in my head.  At least managed to do that with it affecting my running - but certainly affected any possibility of enjoying it.

  • Woohoo - got an interview for the job image

  • Congrats Bear!!

  • Well done Bear!

    I need hugs today.  Nothings wrong as such but a lot of small things are building up and getting to be too much.

  • ((( Caz )))

  • Big hugs Caz.  (((Caz)))

    Could do with some myself.  Just haven't really got over going away last weekend.  IT went OK but I've just been running on a deficit of me time this week - even though I'm getting plenty in the evenings, it's soon time to get up and go again and I just don't feel up to it.  Oh well, one more day then I've got three days off.  Fortunately I do have a fairly generous leave entitlement and take most of it in single days tagged onto weekends.

    Great news Bear.

  • Woohoo Bear

    I will disinfect myself hthoroughly then hand out loads of hugs
  • Don't think I mentioned, I've entered my first 10k race for this year.  Well it's the 2nd one I've entered as I'm already in for Lincoln 10k but have now entered Gainsborough 10k which comes around first in about 3 weeks time.  Really need to get a good one in to build some confidence.

  • Miss by eck has been baking today. There are homemade sausage rolls, a sponge, and some rather scrummy cookies if anyone is tempted
  • I'll skip the meat filled sausage rolls but cookies sound great!

    How's the cold today, by 'eck?

    I've been sat close by the guy who most probably caused the term 'man flu' to come into use.  It's not the coughing and sneezing (which can't be helped) but the amount of moaning and groaning that goes with it that's the problem. 

    Oops, you probably daren't complain about your cold now!

  • It's getting better thanks. I had a boss who insisted on you working from home if you were coughing and sneezing. He said you were more productive and didn't infect half the officdw
  • (()) to those that would like.

    Glad to hear the cold is getting better by 'eck.

    Congrats on getting an interview Bear.

    I will pass on the food, I have been away at a conference and it feels like I have eaten enough food for a month.

    Good news is that our friend may be able to get a puppy as he has found someone to look after it during the day. image

  • Hey all 
    Sorry I'm very quiet it'll probably stay that way for a little while, I'm so happy you guys still talk I like popping in when I can and feeling comforted by your chatter. 

    I've got a bit of a dilemma the mental health team don't think that my recovery is entirely 'real' they think that while it's lovely that I'm feeling so much happier because we haven't done any of the trauma work (cos we did Dissociative Identity stuff instead) it's all festering away under the surface and I'm blocking it and eventually it'll all fall apart. They want me to speak with a clinical psychologist again with a view to doing the trauma stuff, I don't want to I just want to be happy for a while. 

    I spoke to a friend who I respect and whose opinion I value and she said she agreed with the mental health team, she thinks she can feel the darkness just under the surface too. 

  • Solb, I tend to agree with the mental health team and your friend.  Its great to see you happy but it feels like a mask to me

    Sorry if that comes across bluntly.  I'm a bit drunk.  Hiding behind my own mask at the moment

  • (((Solb))) If its of any help, I've said I've been "well" 3 or 4 times only to find out that I wasn't well at all. I was better than before, but I still wasn't well. Thats the trouble with mental health, you can't check your pulse or stick a themometer in. But in the mean time enjoy being better than before. You are doing great. I still think I'm well but had a wobble today when it was suggested I go back to my old job next week. I replied that I had no intention of ever going back and my crappy old boss responded that it was probably better for everyone back there if I didn't. I started to crumble at not being wanted or valued but kept my head high. I'm getting it more in perspective now. I have to remember that I might never be 100% well, just have to contain my thoughts. 

    Sorry for rambling on. I've had a couple of  glases  of wine image and anyway I'm now in my nice place of work for another month till end of March. Will see what happens then. 

    Caz - giving you a big behind the mask hug. 



  • I'm not drunk. I wish I were
  • I'm not drunk either, but I have eaten half a large bar of belguim dark chocolate.

  • I'm drunk on hot chocolate!
  • About to start on the wine and chocolate shortly.  A night early as I've finished work for the week as I'm off out to see Uriah Heep in Bilston tomorrow night.  A bit of a long trip and I'm on driving duties.

    Drunken hugs all round ((((everyone)))).  Particularly SOLB - looks like you've still got challenges ahead.  Let's hope it's all part of heading in the right direction towards better times for good.

    Soupy - whoever thought you should go back to your old job clearly hasn't got a clue.  At least the end result is right and you can move on from there.

    Been on the night orienteering again tonight.  Part of it was round streets tonight and pleased to say my running was quite good again.  Feeling like I'm about ready to tackle a 10k again.

  • Hope everyone is alright. SOLB - good luck with it. It's frustrating when you fell better but people tell you you aren't....but the mind is an odd thing and can mask hidden problems. Better to get them all sorted then relapse again....

    Having a very frustrating time with my knee / leg. No longer painful, just uncomfortable and stuff. Takes about 3 miles to get into a run and for it to no longer feel uncomfortable. Just feels awkward and annoying before that...and very much a mind game of getting through those easy few miles.....but I'm no good at 'mind over matter'. My mind tends to win. 

  • Got quite drunk last night and ended up stuffing my face.....definitely eating my feelings. Instant regret and then completely freaked out about it. Haven't got so worked up about food in a long time and it was just horrible image

  • Big hugs (((rwtw)))

    I definitely eat for comfort and then have big issues with my weight problem.  Things were obviously getting very frustrating for you.  You need to be able to forgive yourself the occasional slip up.  Not nice though.

    Late one for me last night as I was out seeing a band and it was a long drive and a motorway closure on the way back made it longer.  I coped well and managed to keep a positive attitude. Good company and a good show helped.  I think that having to make that effort though takes it out for me.  I'm just feeling emotionally exhausted today.  Fortunately I don't have to do much so I can treat myself to a quiet one.

  • Thank you LR. In reality I probably didn't eat a huge deal of calories....just I've been resitricting carbs and so obviously I ate a huge amount of carbs image

    Well done on keeping positive. I get so frustrated driving far! And yeah, putting on a brave face definitely takes a lot out of you, so chill out and watch the rugby image 

  • Yeah I ought to do that really but Lincoln City are at home so I'm off there.  The only chilling out that that's likely to involve is due it being freezing cold out there.

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