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Mental illness and running
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I think you were wise in deciding to wait and see what happens regarding an offer, if they make an offer they may even be willing to negotiate. I'd negotiate to have a Bear working for me!
Not much I can do now anyway - they'll have finished work until Monday. They've got some more interviews then too - they said I'd probably hear Tuesday.
Wish I was one of these peeps who didn't keep thunking when it makes no difference I have a good plan of action so it's just wasted brain activity.
Have you got any jobs Solb?
I think one job SOLB has is to read the book her best friend sent her today, right SOLB? *giggles mischievously*
Bear, that's completely the right approach. Wait for an offer and then negotiate. It sounds like you got on well with the panel, which counts for a lot!
The 'lottie is great and saves us a huge amount in veg bills but it's bloody hard work. I almost gave it up last year. My plot is the weediest patch and had trees planted on it before I got it. After three years struggling, I've tarpaulined it over completely and am growing everything in boxes filled with...erm...shit
It'll save my battered back from all the weeding and digging and it's giving me more space. Hurrah!
Off to Exeter tomorrow to see some friends of Mr.S. The chap is fine, the wife is really odd, I never know where I am with her. I like to think I'm pretty congenial but she's taken a dislike to me and I'm not sure why. I'm in hosp for an invasive procedure on Monday and I could do without it tbh, but I'll suck it up!
have good weekends all...I probably won't post for a while but I'll be thinking of all of you x
Yes we really did seem to get on well, we even shared a few jokes.
I want to work there but I think it's very important to my mental health atm not to lose my social life.
I wish I could stop thunking!
We used to have an allotment when I was a kid - used to love getting fresh stuff
Here's a CBT site if anyone's interested.
Thats a good site Bear. Thanks
Ahhh Sossidgey one I've read my book several times, seeing as you've brought it up I could post a snippet - don't worry I'll make sure I have correctly referenced the author though
Ahh poor Bear, hope you have managed to find a distraction, if I'm ruminating on stuff that isn't helpful then I either run, find a distraction or stop thinking about it and write it down. Sometimes I think there are loads and loads of things frantically pressing down on me then when I've written it down I realise it's just a couple of big things recircling and being rephrased and a handful of not so important things that feel bad but when seen on paper aren't really so bad. I think feeling everything at once can make it hard to step back and be logical about whether the anxiety is either justified or helpful. You are doing really well, I promise going to the interview and doing so well in managing your anxiety and negative thoughts was an incredible achievement. Don't forget to credit yourself for that!
I have had an absolute blast at Hash's birthday party with By Eck. LR, Frodo, SCaz, T.Mouse and Foxy Lady, TP, Blouse - who haven't posted here before,,...(I am desperately hoping I haven't left anyone off my list!)
I loved dancing about like a drunk daddylonglegs on a trampoline and getting to eat breakfast with everyone else ... and some cake
OCD was pretty good though I needed to come away after breakfast and sort it. (and I'm covered in deeply unattractive OCD spots where I've clawed at the 'badness'; think crack whore meets tomato and that was me at the pub - oh but with a massive grin too!!)
Oh it was so so much fun, I went for a very short run with the lovely Hash in the morning wearing neon pink stripey PJs and borrowed running shoes. I didn't have my inhaler so I was pretty wheezy but it was a nice way to spend the time out with Hash when I couldn't sleep this morning and the village is beautiful.
I just feel on top of the world, I am so so ridiculously lucky to have such wonderful friends!! It's difficult to know where to start with being grateful for RW forumites who have become such real, deep friends.
Plus I have aquired a tent which has promised to take me and not-calling-each-other-girlfriend-yet-but-totally-are R away camping in Cornwall
Bear, I was very sorry not to see you, hope everything was OK. Incidentally has anyone heard from Bricki? Does he still post to his blog? I know that Ben-o is busy IRL but from the very occassional snippet I see of him on FB I think he's OK.
Why am I rambling? Love to all absent friends would probably be easier to write!!
I am so tired, 3 hours sleep in the last 3 nights but every waking moment more than worth it. What a lovely positive end to the week.
xx
PS. I totally kicked OCD's butt this weekend
!!!
Soupy your post has only just appeared - how are you getting on? I've been thinking about you this week and wondering if the worky stuff is getting any better.
It's so nice to hear from you
Yay to kicking OCD's butt!
I was really sorry I couldn't make it and see all the lovely peeps but I'd double booked with an improv show - where I had fabulous fun and got a buzz that is still going - yay!
Just been investigating and Bricki last commented on another RW forum a few weeks ago and has still been active on Stretford-end.com.
Great news about the OCD, SOLB. Great to meet you at last. I thought you seemed on good form - but obviously have no past experience to judge upon - so it's good to hear that there were no OCD problems you were having to cope with.
Oh Bear I am so thrilled you are getting so much out of the improv!
I've been asleep all morning, was really tired but feeling much brighter now
Still no news from the Psychologist after she postponed out last appointment, selfishly I'm really hoping she's not about to go off on long term sick cos I really liked her and felt we could work really well with each other.
It was lovely to see you too LR, I was on good form, had a lot of fun! You didn't seem too anxious either
Boo about the psych Solb
I'm now frantically trying to organise groups to prtform with for two shows - trouble is not everyone can make the same dates but I can and I can see myself getting caught between the two. No way I'm giving up my new fab hobby for a job so I really hope the job doesn't need me to work evenings.
In other buzzing bear news, a rather pretty girl said at the bar after the show that she loved one of my characters. We got chatting and it turns out she's the girlfriend of the improv class teacher, so no joy on that front but I've since found out that she normally performs with one of the leading improv groups in the country so high praise indeed
Awww I'm glad the pretty girl gave you a fantastic compliment even if there's no romance in the air!
Sounds like very very high praise indeed!
I have just ordered some flowers to be sent to a pretty girl
She'll be kind of embarrassed but I hope in a nice way *wibble*
Ooo the flowers couldn't be delivered today but on the plus side they'll be sent tomorrow with a free upgrade
I have just been bitten by the laundry basket while I was ignoring the ironing ... most rude!
Yay good news
I need to find a pretty girl to do nice things for
Just had a quick catch up, hello everyone!
Hi, Rwtw, how's things with you?
Good thanks! I'm all excited as have a project on the go - my best friend who also has recovered from an eating disorder was saying how she wants to do a photoshoot with people who have recovered / are recovering from eating disorders / depression (she's a photographer). i suggested putting it in with some articles of recovery etc etc...and now i'm very keen to do it! positive message of recovery and give people hope that they can become comfortable in their own skin.
Good stuff. To add to the positive vibes, I can say that I seemed to be in a fairly good mood at work today and was quite chatty with colleagues instead of wanting to just hide away. A bit of mundane therapy certainly helped there. Still feeling exhausted though so have opted out of trying to get back to running tonight. Plan is to do it tomorrow night.
Ooh sounds good rwtw
Well done on the weekend LR
Thanks, Bear. Shame you couldn't make it.
It was one of those situations where I needed to be in two places at once
Just had a phonecall - didn't get the job but they were very complimentary
In improv news I've got a team together - we're called the Psychotic Bears
Sorry about the job, it's fab you got good feedback though you did ridiculously well and deserve to feel very proud of yourself for that.
Plus it's nice you have more time for improv ... Cool picture, you mean psychopathic though, psychotic is just hallucinating and delusional psychopaths are more likely to harm people
Oh bum
The t-shirt was just something we found afterwards, we just came up with random words and jammed them together
I'm pleased with the feedback but it's frustrating when I impress peeps but still don't get a job
Yeah, you have every right to feel frustrated too, it is horrible when you've done so well and had to try so hard and things don't quite work out. Job hunting is especially difficult because it's not progressive, it doesn't seem to work at all until suddenly it's all over and you've got a job. It'd be kinder if you could see how much closer you are getting. The fact that you were brave enough to look at it, were succesful at getting to interview and interviewed so well and got positive feedback demonstrates how many steps forward you've made but the 'no' at the end must feel far too final. You've done amazingly little Bear, promise
Oh and I wouldn't worry too much about the TShirts, most people don't know there is a distinction between psychotic and psychopathic I only do cos I have been psychotic (though I have never been a bear)
R (the new gf) thought my shark socks were very cool by the way
Yay she's obviously a smart girl
As someone with MH ishoos I do want to get these things right.
You're right, it would be nice to feel I was progressing, this was a really good job I could get my teeth into too, I'm not overly worried about money yet but I could do with work pretty soon - an much for my wellbeing as anything else.
I've had several more nice comments on the improv too
Hard lines about the job Bear. Fingers crossed it goes your way soon. And great news on how well the improv is going. I'm very impressed.
I'm having my ups and downs, down at the minute cos I ran out of tablets on Saturday and only managed to pick up a prescription today. Felt quite tearful today and went to bed when I got home from work. Just woke up now, feeling a bit better but sort of "heady". I wonder if the tablets are kicking in again?
I've got 2 job interviews on Thursday! one at 11am and another at 3 pm, 12 miles apart so I'm going to be busy. Work is pretty bad right now. They have said they will redeploy me only if I drop my tribunal claim. Thats a big fat NO.
Solb - you are sounding pretty good. Well done and hope the relationship works for you.
Waves to everyone else, I'm meant to be meeting Mr Soup at Pizza Express so have to try and get myself together enough to head out.
Great going getting the interviews Soupy
...but a big bear grrrr at the redeployment thing. Sounds like you've got them worried