Ironman Lanzarote 2013 (3rd weekend in May?)



  • Nice supporting, as ever, there Schmunks!  

    Did the choo-choo find a 'tunnel' to hide in later then?!!! imageimage  Power shag before, Choo-choo after, no wonder the Coach was grinning at the end! image


  • I dont suppose that elephant will ever live that down ...

  • Prince Siegfried wrote (see)

    Nice supporting, as ever, there Schmunks!  

    Did the choo-choo find a 'tunnel' to hide in later then?!!! imageimage  Power shag before, Choo-choo after, no wonder the Coach was grinning at the end! image


    Mwah ha ha ha ha ha. The power shag will never be forgottenimage

  • For anyone who likes their stats to see how many people you overtook (or overtook you) during the swim/bike/run/transitions, have just done one their always awesome 'enhanced results' spreadsheets - and they've just done one for Lanza 2013.

  • Not sure I dare look when it comes to the run leg, but cheers!

    Yay, I had chance to be called a crap swimmer by 340 people image sadly, 104 of them called me a crap runner as they passed me on the walk image

  • I was equally crap throughout image I made up 13 paces on the bike and 8 places on the run...  or should I look  at that as gradual positive progression??? image

  • You can either look at it as gradual positive progression, or evidence that you're a crap swimmer.  That's what I read from the results when I looked at my stats!

  • I like the Percentages overall right at the end, I wonder how many people got close to the percentages spent on that disclinpline in training !!
    Mine was Bike 53% Run 35% Swim 8% and the rest in transition I think !
    Not too bad a break down compared with training I dont think

  • Looking at in a litle more detail - I lost 80 places in T1!! Time to stop faffing I think!!

  • I cant really translate all the rest of the numbers ... I'm easily confused but I did finish   image

  • Didn't spot the % before, mine shows a rather 'Pebble-ish' 47.8% bike, 37.8% run.

    I finished too image

  • Those stats are brilliant, I had no idea there were 109 people who finished behind me, I would have guessed about 20?

    Interesting looking at the overall discipline percentages, there is a guy with the lowest bike split percentage at 43%, he came out of the swim at 1.27, hammered a 6.58 bike then obviously died on the run.  He came into T2 1 hour 10 ahead of me on the run and I beat him to the finish by 3 mins.

    The guy with the longest overall bike % (60%) took 8.20 on the bike and hammered a 3.38 run.

  • I love stats! I overtook 14 guys in T1. I did not think that there were that many bikes left on the racks (o.O)

  • BunglesBungles ✭✭✭

    Hello all. I was at Club O and DnF Lanza. Met Iron Pingu in transition. Made a fool of myself as I had brought my old Specialised Allez triple to race on and commented it was nice to see someone else with a "normal" bike........then she told me she'd had to hire it as her race bike was broken......oh well!, Well done Pingu fantastic effort in the face of adversity!

    Have read this thread from start to finish and am impressed by the support you give everyone. Some fantastic results and for those who didnt finish I'm sure like me that you will be back!!

    No plans for next year (France sounds too hilly!) but IM is on the cards. I'd love to do it in pirate colours........I have completed an IM in Austria 2011.....  do I qualify?

  • Hi Bungles!!  Good to hear from you!

    Tbh, that bike I hired was very similar to my own.. apart from it was black .. not white .. which may or may not have made a difference image 

    I'm still not committing to France, will see how I feel after Outlaw (might be to late then though to sign up).

    You need to get yourself some kit ... there's a kit thread round here somewhere, just put your name down for what you want.  That pretty much covers all you need to do, apart from give yourself a daft name which you've done image


  • image What if Bungles is his real name though Pingu?  If it is, you'll need to call yourself Dave insteadimage

  • BunglesBungles ✭✭✭

    Well Lee, Bungles is actually a girl and I'm known as that as I'm so bloody clumsy!

  • Clumsey eh, sounds like you and Pingu will get on great image

    So lets see, you enter Lanza but france is to Hilly image

    Re the kit and racing as a pirate, anyone is welcome, its more about just having a fun attitude, not taking yourself to seriously enjoying yourself.

    As said, add your name to the kit thread, hang around the forums occasionally and if you can come along and join some of the pre-planned events.  Nice is possibly the main pirate event for next year, there will be pirates at many other events probably Wales, Outlaw and poss other Ironman events.  Keep an eye out on the forum for relevant threads.

  • Incidentally, what was the story around your DNF, youre welcome to add your race report.

  • Iron Pingu wrote (see)


    I'm still not committing to France, will see how I feel after Outlaw (might be to late then though to sign up).


    Rumour has it, it took 6 months to sell out last year.....??

    Welcome to the mad house Bungles! If you're free the first weekend in July, drop in here - you can come and meet the rest of the Pirates image

  • Oh yes, and there is supporting, we're running one of the Outlaw feedstations (7th July), there's a thread about in Tri forum.

    Good way to come and meet others, cheer other athletes etc.  Many of those you may have seen / met at Club O will be there racing/supporting/drinking.

  • Bungles wrote (see)

    Well Lee, Bungles is actually a girl and I'm known as that as I'm so bloody clumsy!

    Oh sorry Bungles! 

  • BunglesBungles ✭✭✭

    No worries Lee! That's the beauty of the interweb you can be whoever you wantimage

    will post a race report when I get a few minutes

  • On the thinly disguised excuse of posting a few links:



    I feel like a slightly naughty schoolchild submitting a piece of late homework.

    Preamble: I'd had a fairly solid block of run training, but really wasn't feeling the love for the bike.  Lousy winter weather didn't help and I ducked too many sessions where I should have HTFU'd.  Saturday mornings with Dorking Masters meant my swim hadn't deteriorated but I hadn't made much progress.

    I travelled out on the Thursday evening to the pirate camp at Club Oceana, which on reflection was a mistake, I ended up missing out on an evening meal (and pre-race briefing) and meant that Friday was a bit full on getting over to registration at Club La Santa, a 30 odd euro taxi fare.  Happily I met the Cupcakes there and got to share a taxi back. 

    Bike assembly, filling transition bikes (which is where the awful reality of what is about to come solidifies for me) and finally carting it all down to transition.  Having racked, a select Piratey group retired to (one of the many) Irish bars on the strip to ogle the bike porn being racked and to laugh at the unfortunate fools hanging their bike transition bags next to their run bags.

    Race day Following the traditional pre-race not very relaxed nights sleep I beat the alarm clock to the 5am wake up call.  Up and on with the factor 50 P20 and as is obligatory under these circumstances I attempted the naked shimmy (TM Mellifera), but it was a tough audience in the mirror and I don't think they were impressed.  Breakfast (indestructible croissant and jam) consumed , and it's time to plug in the noisy music to start to wind up the attitude.  Down to transition, rip open Nakd bars in the bento box and borrow a track pump from the COLT supporters.  More noisy music.  Wetsuit on and then down to the practice area.  The light is not particulary good so I wander a fair way up the beach to find an area with fewer swimmers.  The water is not arctic and the visibility is wonderful, I immediately feel more relaxed about the swim.

  • Swim (1:19:16): Having been very swum over and then a subsequent wobbly moment at Outlaw last year I lined up among the nervous Nerys brigade a fair way back, the calm start was compromised by around seven of us all attempting to pick a turn point around 5 metres outside of the first buoy.  I backed off and spent rest of the first lap taking a fairly wide line which meant a quiet life.  It's a fairly easy course to navigate with a continuous line of floats on the inside of the course and the rescue boats on the outside. 


    The exit of the first lap was a little congested, if only because the guide ropes bunched everyone up.  Second lap was a bit of rinse and repeat, although having congratulated myself for selecting clear goggles on lap one I was now cursing on lap two as swimming out left on the first long straight it was nigh on impossible to sight.  The outside edge of both laps was where the swell was worst and I was pleased to turn back towards the rainbow that was marking roughly where the exit of the swim was.  Visibility was excellent, I thought I only needed to check the beach to my right and the swimmers to the left.  Obviously I must have been channeling the spirit of Candy (the Pirate King) as I managed to headbutt one of the support kayaks.  D'oh.  As per the other reports out of the water (1:19:16) just behind Barley and just in front of Pingu.

    T1 (11:04): I didn't think I hung around but it's a bit of a drag from the beach to the road where the bikes are stored.  I used my own sunscreen rather than relying on the volunteers as I was packing factor 50.  Had I asked I would have found that was what is was they were packing.  I carried shoes and socks up to the tarmaced bit and was happy to see there were a number of buckets for washing sand off feet.

  • Bike (8:11:05): Rain?  Who ordered the rain?  The start of the bike is quite gentle, I'm avoiding all the road markings and tiptoeing round the roundabouts.  It's windy, on the first proper climb out to Yaiza (which doesn't look to be a proper hill) I run out of gears (no more toys in the toy box) I'm contemplating jumping out of the saddle and I'm in a mix of some rather large gentlemen. A draft buster comes past on a motorcycle and politely suggests she'd like to see some bigger gaps between us all.  I drop back and am quite grateful, it's now a question of managing effort than attacking the course.

    I'll defer to the previous reports, the course takes you across most of the island and the further I go the better I think I'm going.  I'm channeling a history of grinding up the Surrey hills, Symes comes past me and fills me in on some of the other pirates he's seen.  I stop thinking about any sort of time and work to rpm, anything below 70 and change down, if I hit bottom gear then just try to keep it as easy as possible.  The wind is still horrible as you drop off the top of the climbs the crosswinds are seriously worrying, do you try to power through or hit the brakes?  I mostly do the latter.

    At one point the wind finally drops, but within 30 seconds I seem to be melting, comedy droplets of sweat running off me.  I happened to be passing Barley at the time and he seemed to be in an even worse situation due to the aero helmet.  Happily (?) the wind kicks back in shortly afterwards.  As has been mentioned elsewhere I don't quite know what heinous crimes the inhabitants of Nazaret may have committed but by the harshness of the roads they've been cursed with it must have been something terrible.  My crap descending skills were confirmed when I was passed by most of the people I overtook on the final 'pig track' descent towards PdC.


  • T2 (12:00): I was Just happy to get off the bike, shoes off to allow running through transition, but everyone around me is walking.  Pick up bag and into the change tent.  Sit to change shoes, caffeine gel, more sunscreen, socks and bodyglide and out for  

    Run (4:32:21): I'd posted a 4:00'ish run at Brighton which I thought was about an IM pace effort. I started the run at about this pace (and as reported ran away from Funkin on his final lap), but I seemed to be an exception to the rule in that most of the field seemed to be walking.  Those that were running seemed to have the mythical two bands (i.e. on their final lap), but were good targets to pace off.  I was feeling relatively OK, but as the first out lap stretched out to the airport I started to falter, I switched to walking and necked a whole cup of iso which seemed to work to get me back on track. 

    Inward long loop completed without too much trauma and I'd picked up a couple of gels.  My half arsed pre-race plan had called for a gel every half hour.  Whatever was printed on the front of the packet was a bare face lie, it was industrial chemical flavour.  The out and back course was great to be able to pirate spot.  Dermot and Symes were both going well, I think I caught Pingu on the second lap and we compared our respective stomach washing machine status, really nice to see Mouse and Meldy out on the run and I think I also managed to spot ITB and Hokori. 

    Lap two I'm introduced to my most favourite Spanish word, 'esPONGja' which is a sponge.  Most competitors opt for an over the shoulder insertion, but there is at least one male athlete who's opted for the false breasts option. The wheels started to drop off towards of the end of lap two (possibly not helped by lack of gels at aid stations), but I was just full. I was only sucking on orange segments at aid stations, but I would seem to arrive to find some other competitor chain sucking, I don't know whether it was the same person or if there's a plan I haven't come across.  The splits suggest I rallied slighly on the final in loop, but it seems I still managed to stuff up the finish as I there were three of us within a short period which meant I still do not have a 'in the moment' finish picture.

    Post: I tell the medics I'm fine and then 5 minutes later I regret the decision, horribly nauseous.  Having visited all of the tents that don't serve food I find the one I want and am then nonplussed by the fact that the hot drinks machine doesn't do tea.  As I'm sat on the bench drinking hot chocolate watching people decamp from T2 I see a line of wedgies (high heels) walk past outside the fencing, it kind of sums up Lanza.  Back to the apartment and 750ml of rego confirms I'm seriously thirsty.

    Observations:  If you're going to be based in Puerto Del Carmen then consider hiring a car (daily rates in town are dirt cheap), arrive before Thursday and if you've skimped on the cycling then consider (even if you've got a compact) sticking a 28 on the rear.  Huge thanks to the other sailors/supporters on the ship it was a blast.

  • image oops slightly longer than anticipated

  • Nice report  image

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