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Just in after running the GSR half marathon in Glasgow today and I've failed spectacularly again. I'm so gutted, I think more so because I really thought I had a chance at this one.
I've been trying to run a sub 2h half since I started running, the nearest I've got is 2h 3min. I genuinely believed I could do it today and was on target all the way to mile 12 but then just couldn't keep going and I'm furious and disappointed with myself in equal measures. Finished in a soul-destroying 2h 8min. I can't describe just how bad I feel about myself. It's made worse by my husband beating his previous PB by 8mins and running 1h 43 - I'm trying to be pleased for him but it only amplifies my failure.
I don't know why I keep doing this to myself. I'll be beating myself with this stick for months or until the next race I manage to mess up.
Is there any hope for me? I've run about 8 half marathons now and failed in all of them. I guess I'm just looking for someone to say they did the same then managed to turn things around and slash their times. Is it possible?
I genuinely feel like throwing my trainers out and never running again because what's the point when I never get any better at it?!