I told my neice that

mulligatawney soup is made out of owls and she believed me. she is outraged.

it will be a shame when she discovers google.

which lies have you told children?


  • popsiderpopsider ✭✭✭

    Eldest daughter used to pronounce magazine as mazageen when she was a toddler - and because I thought it was funny I encouraged her to think that was correct - stopped when I had to stop myself and think which way round was correct one day !   

  • We told our daughter that her pinefore or school was actually a pin-a-five.

    Also that you played chess with prawns.

    (She was not best pleased when she found out that she was getting these words wrong for many years...made us giggle image )

  • David Falconer 3 wrote (see)

    That God is real.

    tried that. she isn't THAT dumb.

  • CindersCinders ✭✭✭

    Lol popsider, our little one still says mazageen and I don't want to correct him!


  • I told them i could tell that they were lying by the colour of thier toungue...worked for yearsimage

  • mazageen sounds better. what does she call margarine? image

  • literatinliteratin ✭✭✭

    When I was little my dad told me that Bognor Regis was called that because the Queen had once been to the toilet there and I believed him.

  • We have told our daughter that Justin Beiber is a swear word
  • Discussion recently about god was that he is someone in the Jesus story
  • I've told my son (3) that hiccups are a sign he's lied to me recently.

  • I told my admittedly at the time very young daughter that trampolines were called that because in "the olden days" they used to be leant on their sides to be used, which because she is young and I am Dad she believed completely.

    Years later when she was 15 she recalled this piece of information totally out of the blue and informed her young niece, sadly she wasn't joking but not being quite so gullible my niece said "Yeah but surely you just fall onto the ground" the look on her face was priceless as the penny finally dropped. 

  • When I was young my dad told me that the "popper" clothes fastening device was named after their inventor Karl Popper.

    Seemed reasonable at the time, and we didn't have Wikipedia back then.

  • Oh yeah and "I'd love to watch Beauty and the beast again with you" closely followed by "It got stuck in the DVD player and doesn't work now" and "we'll get you another one"

  • We told our kid that Disney Jnr no longer worked because the "mickey mouse" programmes were so bad. We just put it on pin protected. It worked and now we don't have to put up with Disney crap. Well worth a little white lie.
  • When I was about 9, my oldest brother told me, if I say i'm going to run away from home they'll lock me up in a mental hospital for the rest of my life. Scared the hell out of me. Turns out he was right though.

  • Hubby tells the weans that Marmite is made by a man who follows donkeys around with a spoon and scoops their poo into jars.

  • my sister told her children that when the icecream van plays the music its because they have run out of icecreamimage

  • literatinliteratin ✭✭✭

    my mum used to tell my sister that some inconsiderate person just had their radio on too loud.

  • CindersCinders ✭✭✭
    Little C loves donkey poo image

    Might remember that one re the Disney channel though!
  • Some of the lies I've told my nephew are the existance of the following: Santa, the tooth fairy, Easter bunny, Justin Beiber.

  • literatinliteratin ✭✭✭

    KK, for the tooth fairy there's the vagina dentata myth... 

  • Kittenkat - I told my son that the fairy had taken his dummy away.  I'm glad they don't go to school together, that could have been awkward!

  • Vagina dentata (Latin for toothed vagina) describes a folk tale in which a woman's vagina is said to contain teeth, with the associated implication that sexual intercourse might result in injury or castration for the man

    That's true though, men wil do anything for a "bit", and therefore can lose their self determination. 


    the dude abides wrote (see)

    mulligatawney soup is made out of owls and she believed me. she is outraged.

    it will be a shame when she discovers google.

    which lies have you told children?


    David Falconer 3 wrote (see)

    That God is real.


    Leviticus 11:13-19 " These, moreover, you shall detest among the birds; they are abhorrent, not to be eaten: ....the owl .....and the little owl ....and the great owl....and the white owl...... and the bat.


    (bats?. bats are not birds - absolute proof of  god's nonexistence!)

  • RicFRicF ✭✭✭

    That bollocks appear in many forms



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