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Although, I once shared a flat with a girl who had a thing for frozen cucumbers, but that's another story.
Oddly enough, I have no problem whatsoever with cabbage, broccoli, cauliflower and other sprout-like vegetables, and need to overdose quite heavily on beans and peas before causing olfactory suffering.
Too much milk sets things off too because I'm relatively short of lactase. My threshold is the amount it takes to soak three shredded wheat.
Slowboy - I have to admit, I bottled that one!! Doh!
v/rap - 36 hours of farting after sprouts AND you can eat THREE Shredded Wheat!! Scary lady!
But for best effect, dried apricots. I found out the hard way (i.e. during a hard 10k off roader) that I'm mildly allergic to them. Extremely musical for the first 3k, then clamped buttocks of the 'my god I don't dare fart I'll follow through' kind for the remainder.
Finished about third from last, ran straight through the finish line into the bog and I'm convinced everyone must have heard the blast.
Forgot to mention Bombay mix and other Indian snacks. EVERY component of the stuff has flatulogenic potential.
Just remembered my all time worst - a roast dinner and two glasses of wine with an Amoxycillin chaser. The doctor said to take the antibiotic at least an hour before a meal and I forgot to one time. "What could be the worst that could happen?" I thought to myself as I swallowed the innocuous looking table. The worst farts ever. We're talking bad. And not just loud and pungent but actually painful as they brewed and agony as they expelled. What followed does not even need to be discussed.................
Mark H/Slowboy - a pint of badly stored Old Speckled Hen created had a rather unpleasant after effect and led me to consider a career in pebble-dashing
nessie - If cauliflower on its own sets you off, surely it's a little irresponsible to consume curried cauliflower soup. You could cause someone to fall down the stairs at work because their eyes were smarting. If you travel on buses just think what the consequences of a rectal hiccup might be. Need I go on? There could be a trail of devestation in your wake.
v/rap - having similar feelings as yours about Shredded Wheat I was unable to visualise the quantity of milk required. Sorry! Must say, I love the word FLATULOGENIC. It will slip quietly (with perhaps the odd squeak or phut) into my vocabulary.
I reckon the resulting liquid could have fuelled my car. It was potent. The trouble was, we couldn't believe how strong it was and kept trying more. Between two of us we nearly finished 3 litres of the stuff in an evening. I have no recollection of whether it induced flatugenic activity because basically I have no recollection of much at all. I rememeber still having a headache two days later that felt like a small nuclear explosion had gone off in my head.
As for flatulence, I was back on form last night. It was a run that could be well and truly described as wet (because of the rain!) and windy. It was good for another reason in that I stumbled across a load of circular paths that go up and down some quite testing slopes. I'd seen the gate that led to them but never venture through it before. I know where I'll be doing my hill sessions now!!
HH
Going backwards to read these cos im crying, its so funny
Personally I suffer little from wind; it tends to be more the runner's trots that get me.. eek!
I can ALWAYS find something to duck behind however, and am known to carry appropriate amounts of loo roll in my shorts pockets
benz - BOING? Elighten me. Did Zebedee pay a visit or is it one of these new fangled text-isms?
bune - it can strike at any time, especially when you least expect it!! Don't become complacent!
Psi - thankfully I've not fallen foul of RTs but I suppose the same goes for those as it does for flatulogenesis. Best I take my own advice that I gave to bune!! Did start off on my long jaunts with toilet paper just in case but found that I got rather funny looks from people and, after all, a roll of Andrex down the front of your Ronhills is a bit of an encumbrance.
slowboy - I was keeping my socks round the back for a muffling (!?) effect but again imagine the looks.
Oh, and rb - if you're out there in forumland, how did Amsterdam go? Drop any good ones? Try any interesting cake?
To really drag the tone of the conversation down (and lord knows it's low enough already) regarding your 'interesting cake' comments - as, apparently, the way to enjoy the halucinogenic effects of magic mushrooms without the apprently terrible hangover is to drink the urine of someone who's eaten them - no, seriously, this was on TV so it must be true, apparently the halucinogens go straight through your kidneys but the bad stuff gets filtered out by them - d'you think it should be possible to get high by smelling the trumps of someone who's pigged out on space cake??
rb - well done! Good job (or, hopefully not as the case may be). Bet you are well pleased. How did you feel after?
BTW - do you reckon that if this topic has reached out to people and brought them together as a united group of farters, making them feel at one with each other, it could be classed as a touching thread?
Wondering what's next... Any suggestions for good 10km races nr London early next year? Think I'll be down the gym tomorrow for a little cycle work to get the legs (and possibly gases) moving again...
we've just had a job vacancy round for someone to head up the Financial Accounting and Reporting Team
any applicants?
Unfortunately, in a rush of enthusiasm at the thought of running a department called FART I've revealed the awful truth. And I'm sure I had you fooled into thinking I was an interesting person really.
RB, I've never fancied the hallucinogenic magic mushroom urine trick myself. You can also apparently get some kind of trip by licking some species of toad, and I think I'll give that a miss as well.
Stressed at work, rushing down lunch. Can feel the stomach beginning to burble already, should be in fine musical form in an hour or so. Happy Farting.
- not sure if it's open to external people & it is 'down south' (Hemel Hempstead).
Confession time - the reason I see these things is that I'm also in finance (not qualified though so not quite as barking as the rest of you!)