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Anyone been in this situation before? I'm not sure what to do for the best. So awkward (& disrespectful) when it concerns a funeral...
My Mum sadly passed away suddenly & unexpectedly 2 weeks ago. It hit us all hard as it was a sudden death and the day before her birthday. My Dad took it really bad as unfortunately most of his other relatives passed away with various things over the last 2 decades, so his support network is just my brother & I.
We were starting to accept the death and plan for the funeral and move on with things but a massive family feud has erupted & I'm stuck in the middle. I'm afraid of loosing contact with my Dad or my brother and his family or even worse - both.
The arguement started with my sister in law telephoning my Dad on 2 ocassions demaning money towards the wake (not sure why she was involved as my brother was sorting that out & I was organising the flowers and some of the paperwork). Her tone and manner were vey rude, abrupt and hurtful. I received a similar unpleasant email. Unfortunately my Dad in his state of grieving took this really badly and has reacted with an anger and hatred I've never seen before.
This isn't an isolated incident - she has upset the family on a few ocassions before & unfortunately the most recent incident seems to be the final straw with my dad. Her manner is very domineering and abrupt, however I know my brother loves her so even though her email to me was very rude, I have replied sensibly to it.
I dont really want to take sides, but my Dad is still angry today and wants nothing more to do with her. He wants the whole wake to be cancelled and has not spoken to my brother for the past 2 days.
This whole situation is really awkward & I wondered if anyone who had been through similar before can share any words of wisdom. I cant ask any other family members for advice as they are either ill or very elderly & I don't think it is fair to burden them.
If I lose contact with my brother and his wife I am worried I will never see them or their children again (both nephews are only young), however I am worried about my Dad's level of anger and resentment - it doesnt seem healthy. He has been given sleeping medication from the doctor.
So what's the best course of action if any or should I remain totally uninvolved?