Staying Healthy

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  • Dear Cath,

    I think I hear what you say. It takes a lot of time, probably mostly on your own to get to grips with what is happening.

    Others cannot do it for you, and it has to be done. Adjusting to my less serious and less acute fears, I found I needed time. Useless to try and shrug it off, join the active world, find company to scare away the thoughts that live in the shadows. Had simply to stare at the shadows, and say yup, if necessary, can do that. I call it wallow time.

    Have confidence that your concentration will come back, that when your brain has got round it, you will be yourself again.

    Believe me, I am thinking of you. Marj
  • youre allowed to have lazy days Cath
    Dont feel guilty about it
    All my love
    Ruthxx
  • Welcome back Cath!!!
    I've been away for the weekend and just got back tonight and the first thing I've done is come on line to see if you'd posted! First of all, I just want to say that I'm so glad your surgeon found the bugger and took it out! Secondly, I just want to offer you all my support and let you know that I am thinking of you. As you say Cath, you're gonna have good days & bad days - but be assured that whatever day you're having, you can always come on here and have a moan or cry about it all and you know that we'll all be here to support you in whatever way we can. You have touched so many people's lives Cath, I mean we don't even know you, but everyone on here has been so moved and humbled by your story and by your sheer determination. Keep fighting Cath and make sure you win this 'race'. All my love sweetheart.
    Michelle xxx
  • Cath,
    I've been following your posts, and am glad you're back up and about. As so many people have said, and very eloquently too, I'm thinking of you, and sending you my support.

    Embrace the good days, don't be afraid of the bad days, just get through them and let them go. Don't feel like you have to be perky and upbeat all of the time, but when you're down, let the thought of the good times, the running, the things you are going to do next (a pb?) carry you through it.

    It suprises me how it is possible to care and worry about someone I've never met, but you are so open, it's impossible not to feel like I know you in some way. Keep posting (whether your perky, angry or grumpy) as we do care and worry.

    Take care,
    love Amanda
    xxooxx
  • Cath hope today has been a good day for you. If you need cheering up just read some of Tims threads, they certainly helps some of us to pass a boring afternoon at work, I wonder about his sanity, mind you I think the majority of Forumites are a bit crazy.
  • Hi Cath,
    How's today been for you? I'm having a down day because I've had to pull out of the Windsor 1/2 'cos I've got to have an op. the week before (cervical not breast like you). Tried to stay positive and have found another 1/2 the day before the op. so am thinking of entering that just to prove I can fight back. Your strength has rubbed off on me! Thanks.
    Susie
    ps email me if you need to have a moan
  • Have had a down day. I'm not sure if you could tell from the photo I had.. I had really long hair. I had it cut today. I look like a boy but it's supposed to stop it falling out quicker when the chemo starts

    Redhead -- good for you. Not feeling very positive myself today. Bad hair day and the oncologist's secretary rang to confirm the appointment so it kind of hammered it home a bit.

    ho hum
  • Thats a bummer about the hair
    My thoughts are with you cath xxx
  • benz -- from a doc to a nurse, you know, that means alot my friend :)
  • cath, next time you go to BUPA, challenge them to come up with a TASTY low fat meal
    Then tell us the recipe!!
    I hope you,re having a LARGE Chardonnay
    Vrap, if you see this, its only for medicinal purposes
    Thinking of you petal xx
  • Cath, short hair makes you look younger so whilst you may feel like sh1t you will still look young and gorgeous.
    I'm routing for you.
    Take care, Susie xxx
  • Yes that's true Redhead - I've had long hair nearly all my life and now, at the age of 38, just KNOW I look like mutton dressed up as lamb!!! One of my friends, who has always had long hair, recently had it cut really, really short (sort of Victoria Beckham'ish) and she looks FANTASTIC - as Redhead says, it has taken years off of her. And listen darlin, it'll grow back!!, but you'll probably get used to your new modern image & love it and choose to keep it short!!! Oh I think I've convinced myself now... might give the hairdressers a ring in the morning!!!
    Thinking of you lots Cath & you too Susie and routing for both of you.
    Lotsa Love,
    Michelle x
  • Short hair rocks. So much less fuss. After years of flirting with various styles, I had mine shorn on impulse when I was 32 (and about a week away from giving birth) and loved it. It's good to know that I can wreck it with sweat and chlorine and it doesn't matter because 8 weeks hence it will be on the hairdresser's floor anyway. If I had a pretty face and a nice rounded head, I'd go for a Sinead O'Connor without hesitation.

    I'm sure it really suits you and you'll get loads of compliments, Cath.

    Susie, I hope this wretched operation cures you and you're not out of action for too long. Stories like yours bring home the fact that there is a point to all those unpleasant screening tests women suffer and it's not just a case of picking up and lasering things that would probably have got better by themselves anyway.

    Love and blessings, V-rap.
  • My style guru (middle daughter) informs me that the older you are the shorter you should go, so mines very short.
    I'm sure like me the majority of the females on forums have read both Cath and Redheads posts and thought that could be me, I'm not sure I would be as brave as you two though. Lots of Hugs. And Cath don't forget your passport when you cross the river.
  • I'm still a long hair afficionado myself, although I think that as an academic, I can get away with it being part of the pseudo-tweedy look of a medievalist. So I keep telling myself.

    Anyway Cath, your hair may end up really cool looking. My aunt had breast cancer about 7 years ago. Before, she had always had long straight hair, dyed brown after it went grey. After all of her treatment, including chemo, was over, she decided to keep it short and no longer colour it. Well, her new natural colour - grey with crazy flashes of white - looked so groovy that people kept on complementing her on her avantguard 'highlights' as well as the short style in general.

    So, you too might start a new trend?!
  • You Guys, what are you like... listen, I know I look like a boy and I know I don't like my hair short but I hear you and I hear that I'm bucking a trend anyway. Besides, I'm at the Charleen Spiteri (Texas) stage so the next step is Sinead O'Connor which hopefully won't be as traumatic but if it is oh, whatthe hell, I'll worry about that when I get to it.

    Redhead -- How's things..? How're you feeling..?

    Not having too bad a day of it myself today. I've been up early today because I find I'm knackered and needing a rest by early afternoon. I actually had a sleep yesterday - couldn't believe that and I ended up going to bed at 9:30pm, mind you I think that had more to do with the Mr trying to get me enthused with Star Wars. So yep, am feeling considerably brighter today - I think it must be the weather - it's really warm and sunny here and already I've been out once with the dog. Not much else planned today. I've been writing a diary so I think I'm going to type that up and make it easier for myself. Hope you guys are okay and thanks for being there :)
  • Hiya Cath,
    Glad you're feeling a bit brighter. What dog have you got Cath? I really miss my boy - taking him for his walks every day! Had to have him put to sleep a few days before Christmas. I've got two Siamese cats now - they're mad as hatters, but lovely all the same - still, not as good company as my Ben was though - a beautiful greyhound, who had just the loveliest temperament - despite being very badly beaten and neglected by his previous owners! Anyway, what a lovely day today - I've already been out for my run this morning - gearing up for this 10K I've saddled myself with on Sunday (my first ever!).. Oh dear!!
    Michelle x
  • Cath - getting back to the hair thing - I meant to tell you.. one of the little boys I teach in my drama club had cancer last year and lost all his hair.. and he had a wardrobe full of different coloured baseball caps.. but now, he has a full head of gorgeous brown hair - that I just can't stop ruffling!!!
    Michelle x
  • Hi Michelle - it's really warm and sunny here - nearly fell asleep because I'm sitting in the front room with the sun streaming in. Anyway, I've got a Golden Retriever called Oscar and he's the most lovely dog you've ever come across - he's really sweet, a bit boisterous at times but as your dog was, he has a lovely temperament. Oh and I'm not worried about my hair not growing back or anything - in fact a few of my friends ahve mentioned that it will probably grow back in better condition than it was before (although they also say it could go curly - which I'm not keen on).
  • Cath,
    if your hair grows back curly you will have to upload a new picture!
    I am off for a few days so I won't be able to follow this thread.
    I just want to say to you and Redhead that I will be thinking of you both.
  • Afternoon Cath, you sound chirpier today. I'm pleased you are because I'm still feeling sulky even though I had a great ride this morning in the sunshine to help blow away the cobwebs. I think it's because hubby is taking the whole thing rather badly. He's trying to be brave but he can't seem to shake off the fear of the worst case scenario happening.

    I love golden retrievers and hubby and I want to get one eventually (can't at the moment because elderly mother lives with us and would get knocked over by boisterous dog!). We have 2 cats and a rabbit at the moment but I would have a menagerie if not kept in check by hubby! We're looking for a house with some land so I can get horses again. Sorry I've wandered off track.

    On the subject of hair, my friend lost hers and sported a series of different coloured wigs until her own grew back. She had all sorts of different colours and even had a red one that outshone mine. When her hair grew back it was even thicker and stronger than before - didn't go curly though.

    Feeling better now I've had a moan. Thanks for your thoughts V-rap (you're so right about screening and I'll start a thread to alert others when all this is over), Michelle, Wicked Witch and Dark Helmet.

    Take care Cath and speak to you soon.

    Susie



  • Hi Cath

    I'm glad you've had good weather today - I always think your mood is better and life seems brighter when the sun's shining. I've been away on business so I've not been chatting, sorry. I'm not surprised you feel a bit at sea. Your world's been turned upside down and you must still be feeling the effects of your operation - anasthetic can take ages to leave for your system. Allow yourself your duvet days - they're good for you. You don't sound like the kind of person to wallow so if you feel lethargic you need rest.

    Sorry about your hair - that must be a wrench - but it is true that you shouldn't hang on to long hair for too long - and short hair can look very foxy !

    Redhead I'm so sorry to hear your news. I think you're very brave to find another marathon - don't do it unless you really want to. I shall miss you at Windsor but I'll think of you as I run (walk, stagger...) You've been so supportive about my nerves. Thank you. Hope it all goes well.
  • Redhead and Cath,
    Certainly understand about good and bad days.
    Thinking of the pair of you.
  • Hi Cath
    Another really crap day at work, but this thread always cheers me up by all the positive things on it
    Glad youre feeling better
    Sharleen Spiteris cool
    Redhead, youve reminded me to book my third smear test recall
    Have a horrid feeling it will be the hozzie next
  • Hi Cath & all,
    Sorry, I'm back on the pets..!!! I love Golden Retrievers! Mind you, I love all animals, I'm a complete animal nut and if I ever come into money, I'm gonna open up my own animal sanctuary! I've done voluntary work at vets, rescue kennels & greyhound kennels, but I am just so emotional that I end up coming home & crying all night - wanting to bring them all home with me! The Mr. always says to me.. 'you love those cats more than you love me..' and I say, 'No, I love you all the same..' which, for some reason, doesn't make him smile!! Miss my greyhound, Ben so much still though.. still cry over him and it'll be 9 months this month. I'll get another greyhound one day, but still too upset at the moment (mind you, don't know what the nutty Siameses will say about that!!!!). Take care and, as always, I'm thinking of you Cath & Susie...
    Michelle x
  • I've just re-read my last posting.. and I sound like one of those saddo nutcases who are obsessed with animals... like a mad cat-woman!! I remember when I was a kid, there was a woman who we all called the 'mad cat lady' cos she lived alone with about a 100 cats... oh dear..think I've just had a peep into the future at myself...!!!! Oh well.. that's life!!!
    Michelle x
  • Morning all, Redhead I'm way ahead of you on the screening, check up on Friday after a scare 2 yrs ago, I now have smear tests every year. Had a mammogram the day after my 50 birthday. I don't stick my head in the sand and think it's not going to happen to me. I am amazed at the amount of females who don't go for either of the above, ok neither of them are fun, but it only takes 5 minutes, compared with the treatment that Redhead and Cath will have it's chicken feed. And I hope the males on Forums are paying attention because you don't escape, you need to check your bits just the same.

    Hope to day is a good day for all, weather forecast is apparently really good for the next few days, so get that dog out Cath enjoy the sunshine.
  • Well big day planned ahead of me. Clinic visit to see the surgeon at 3.30pm and the visit the chemotherapist at 5pm. The mr and I talked about chemotherapy and infertility because apparently it does that to you in some cases - anyway we decided that if the chemo would stop the cancer reoccurring then we'd go with what the doc suggests and not put my life at risk. We had risky chances of conceiving anyway because I have PCOS (quite badly and would have needed IVF anyway) so we decided it wasn't worth the risk for something which might be unable to happen anyway. So it looks like the deal without children is pretty much definate although I was up early this morning (some of you will have seen) and was looking at the cancer information sites and it seems that the younger you are the more chance there is of your fertility returning to what it was before so you never know, hopefully we could come out with at least the same chances we had before.

    The thing that gets me so annoyed about this whole cancer deal is that day after day there has been no let up, no chance to let the dust settle before something else has reared it's head and had to be faced. Yesterday I didn't post because basically I was sad - I had to call the National Organ Donor Register and they removed my details. The woman on the phone was very nice and she explained she realised I was doing something very hard because it was a strong belief I had about donating organs. She also said that I may be able to donate at some clear point in the future - I asked when that would be. 20-30 years she said. I had to stop myself from laughing - I'll be 62 then I wonder whether the organs will be of any use then :)

    Anyway, morning all and hope you're all well.

    Redhead -- hope you're feeling a bit better today.
  • Oh the other reason I didn't post yesterday AFTERNOON I meant to say... I slept all afternoon long again :) Sleep heals they say :)
  • Cath, sorry to hear you are so down, but I can well understand it. The children thing is incredibly hard too. Is there any chance you can freeze part of your ovary? I thought people did this to retain it for future use? (I was addicted to those Professor Winston programmes.)

    Anyway good luck at the Clinic today and I'll be thinking of you.

    Take care

    Caz
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