Running after a break-up

Just curious: has anyone else out there taken up running after divorce or separation?

I know there must be others. It all seems more positive than alternative ways to move on but I am not sure how non-runners feel about dating obsessive health freaks.

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Comments

  • Not as such but I am assuming that this is a fairly difficult time for you ( been there etc) in which case you will probably find running most beneficial in terms of fitness menatl and physical and also stress release. Much more beneficial in fact than alcohol and tablets. As for dating non runners then should you adapt your life to other peoples or should there be a half way house in a relationship ? Decide what YOU want from life and go for it. Besides you might find that if you join a running club or go to races you will meet like minded people and a new social circle.
    I found that when I took up running prompted by my new girlfriend and now my wife it got rid of a lot pent up emotions I had stored from a previous disastrous encounter. Now my running has taken on a different form and gives us both a sort of focus.
    I hope this helps and good luck. Go do it !
  • 3rd line I do of course mean mental !
  • I would agree with Bobolink. Running is a better way of relieving the stress and taking your mind off the difficult situation you must be going through. Set yourself a goal and train for it.

    Also, what's wrong with dating runners???

    There are some real nice people out there...


    ...don't rush into anything....
  • Starting Again,

    I agree with the Boblink... but most important of all I think is that the running will give you more self-confidence (something usually lacking after a split). You mention how non-runners feel about dating obsessive health freaks - well I think it's easier if they know that you from the beginning....
    I on the other hand have just started this health freak phase (in the last six months) and I can say that it already causes friction between myself and my partner because I am a changed person (albeit for the better - fitter, healthier, happier, more outgoing, need I go on ?). Have I waffled enough? (sorry)


    Good luck and HAPPY RUNNING !!
  • But foxy surely I am your partner and it has only brought us closer......?


    ;)
  • Starting-again, sorry for being silly!! Running is always good. Do it for you, and a happy sideeffect is that you will also meet lots of likeminded peeps (as on here...).And runners as a section of the population in my humble opinion seem to be EMINENTLY more desirable than other sections of the population.......
  • Personally, I like running because I get to meet loads of fit looking birds.

    So, to summarise, it gives you a focus, it gets you out, it makes you feel more positive and you might, just might, one day end up with a physically perfect partner who doesn't smell of fags and chips.
  • DB,

    LOL!!! Fit looking birds (Foxy, Badge etc...)WAS on my mind but I wasn't going to say so!!
  • RB,

    Am I good at counselling or what?
  • RB - think you are holding too much store my a very old photo....!!

    DB - you are a saint!
  • I used to work with a chap who had been a sub 2:30 marathon runner but had become less serious since his marriage. When he got divorced, he started doing 100+ miles a week training and travelling the place to do marathons. I think he found it gave him a good focus away from the miseries of every day life and some positive experiences. Cost a fortune in shoes, apparently...
  • Going through a very bad patch in my own relationship at the moment i can testify that it is running that keeps me sane.
    It is an excellant way to fight of depression and to get rid of all those negative feelings that rear their ugly head from time to time.
  • DB,

    You are a great consellor. I'll use you if I ever have the need!!

    Badge,

    You put yourself down. I'm sure that you are still a real babe!!!!
  • I agree with DB who is certainly wise.

    I think running is great and I should know as I have been dumped many times, ha, ha!

    Hope you enjoy the running!!!
  • Stating again,

    I got divorced 2 years ago, I started drinking far too much and eating too much to block it out, so, in Feb this year I thought "right thats it I must pull myself together" so I started walking and then onto running and have now lost 3 1/2 stone and have cut right back on the drink.
    Running has sorted out my head and made me fit into the bargain.

    Not sure about what a non running partner would say as I am still on my own and have no intention of looking for anyone, for the moment anyway as I am really enjoying the single life again and the freedom.

    All the best to you Startin Again with your running and good luck with your quest to start again.

    Cheers Gaz...............



  • Running makes you feel very good about yourself - have to be careful you don't get too smug though!! So it's a great way to get over most things...
    Anyone had to get divorced because of running?

    DB / RB - Agree totally!

    Gaz - you look about 12 now!
  • Thanks Greeny,

    See running takes years off you...........
    and yes it does make you feel very good about yourself.................
  • Well it seems that I am not alone. It certainly feels better than booze/clubs at the moment.

    I am not looking for anyone at the moment - I just worry about the future sometimes like one does when your world gets turned upside down. I was going to mention how good looking and young for their age all the female runners I have met seem to be but thought that might seem I was in it for the wrong reasons :-).
  • Seems like a good reason to me... ;-)
  • And it sems like a damn good reason to me!!
  • lol - well you've cheered me up today, so that can't be a bad thing!

  • In the midst of such a thing myself at the moment. Running can make me feel better about myself at a time when not a lot else does ... of course sometimes it's just a pain in the @rse.

    SR
  • Shall we start a Forum dating club?!
  • lol again - well I am sure it would be better than match.com, but what would be on the profiles?
  • Starting Again
    Don't worry too much about the future at the moment. Think about all the things you can now do without having to check with anyone else. There is a big world out there just waiting to be explored. You never know what's around the corner and who you might meet.
  • Starting again

    Yes I think running is a brilliant way of unwinding/dealing with the stresses life can lob up from time to time.

    It seems quite natural to re-assess your priorities and goals when several of the things you've taken as givens for some time disappear. There's nothing wrong with diverting your focus to a new subject, even if eventually you think you might want to re-focus again later.

    Staying healthy & positive at the moment is the best thing you can do for you - let the rest sort itself out.

    And yes dropping in behind a neat Foxy style posterior on a run is very good for the spirits :-)
  • I started running nearly 5 years ago now. I had been running 6 months when I decided that my partner of 13 years was more like a brother, who by the way hated my running, so out the door he went!!!

    Anyway for 18 months I was celibate and threw myself into running and had a pretty fantastic travelling round the country with mates doing races, challenges all kinds of healthy things.

    Works wonders, I definitely believe that running helped me through it all!
  • Good to read all of this. Training for this year's FLM certainly helped me through some lean times last winter and although we tried to patch things up the marriage is now over. My focus is now very much on next year's FLM and feeling good about myself through my running. It really helps to have a goal to see you through.
  • Well mate you are def not the only one with those kind of probs.
    I myself had a breakdown about 6 mths ago, its hard to get your head round it but the running thing def helps.
    Try and be strong the DS is with you.
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