The Runner's Arms. (Forum pub.)

[Deleted User]

That explains the puddle in the corner, I`ll go and get a mop. Dirty girl!

[Deleted User]

You might need more than a mop if I know Paula

[Deleted User]

So that's what that puddle I stepped in during the London Marathon was, then. It was Paula's pee.
Only joking Paula. (Phew, I think I got away with that one.)

[Deleted User]

Just been chasing after her... unpaid bar bill would you believe.
Kept up for the first 10 miles but then couldn't keep up any longer.

[Deleted User]

Ok, so I ran out of petrol.

[Deleted User]

Bit quiet in here, innit?

[Deleted User]

More karaoke?.

[Deleted User]

'once I was afraid, i was petrified..............'

Gives a drink quick and I will shut up, promise........

[Deleted User]

More, more!!!!!!!!!!!

[Deleted User]

Now look 'ere glugg, that should have been enough of my singing to make you want to shut me up so wheres me pint?!!

[Deleted User]

Here you are, one big pint )

[Deleted User]

hello, [limps quietly in] please can i have a cheer up medicinal drink, preferably one to repair torn tendons?
thanks

[Deleted User]

Fantastic,

slurp slurp slurp slurp

That went down well, any chance of another?

Tell you what, I'll help myself, what can I get you whilst I'm on that side of the bar?

[Deleted User]

Hi Twinkle, I'll get you a drink whilst I'm behind the bar, what will it be?!

[Deleted User]

ok - what is medicinal? Whisky?

[Deleted User]

Depends on what you like Twinkles

Can make anything medicinal I'm sure!

[Deleted User]

p.s you are kind :@>

[Deleted User]

well, in that case, make it a double baileys! Anyone got any chocolate [shouts to rest of pub]???

[Deleted User]

Here you go then, double baileys,

Not sure it will heal the ligament but drink enough of it and you won't be aware of it anymore!!

[Deleted User]

thank you kindly - that is my plan!

[Deleted User]

takes a large gulp, moves away from the bar in case she is tempted to re-order too quickly, and settles in the corner, baileys and foot in that order..

[Deleted User]

or should i say 'nursing baileys and foot in that order'..

[Deleted User]

Well that was a nice quiet night, everybody drinking isotonic beer. The karaoke nights aren`t very good, should we get some live bands in? sugestions please. I`m going back under me table, night night.

Womble

Blimey! Pub shut tonight? Just when I need a drink to get over Committee Meeting at r*n club. I'll nip round the back and get a little double whisky and sit quietly in the corner.

[Deleted User]

The pub's never shut, you'll always find Glugg under that table.
Think it's become a serve yourself bar.

Womble

It's quite good, isn't it? Now where's that book where we write down what we've drunk...

Oi Glugg!!!

[Deleted User]

I think Paula R nicked it.

Instead of handing over money I've decided to do something charitable for each drink I have.
So that's a pint for me and a (charity) drink for yourself.

Sweetest Thing

Buxom Barmaid here - sorry, had a couple of days off and look what happens? Everything just goes to pot and the profits are right down.

Anyway, I should be back behind the bar tonight to keep an eye on all you reprobates but have to go to the barmaids' running club first (v. handy for when we have to chase after punters who run out without paying, ahem!.

So please use the honesty box and don't pick at the food!!

[Deleted User]

ST. If you`re the buxom barmaid who have been with under this table for the last two days?. Oh well )

[Deleted User]

Ahem, you guys, look at the state of this place. Best get it tidied up before the barmaid gets back.

<< walks away shiftily, whistling >>