Pooh's Corner

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  • Think he has a bit of a cold - although he has had a high temperature in the past because of his chronic constipation - hopefully things there will improve once he uses the toilet regularly - off back to the hopsital with him on 4th October so hopefully no more set backs.

    Hope you have a good day.
  • You too. May just clear up one day. My friends little boy did. Was on various doses of laxatives. They never did say what was cause. Good luck with it anyway.

    Hubby got new job interview on the 3rd oct. Hope he gets it. Hates where he is working. No shift work just days. He will take a drop in money, but will be no worse off than what we were before when he went on permanent days last year. Only because of new car production he went back onto shift. They just payed 200 permanent staff off and took on 200 temps. Local paper reported it as taking on new staff.
  • well done mini grendel - you are a very clever boy! i have some reward stickers and things i can bring to southend if daddy would like me to?

    well done mouselet on your first visit to the dentist!

    good luck mr batmouse with the interview.

    ooh, we all have various things coming up. junior tweety has hospital on 3rd october (follow up after having ears pinned back) and school concert on 4th october which i get to go to, hurrah! and then southend 10k on 8th.

    had a nice day off yesterday, just what i needed. had a lie in (when was the last time i had one of those!) and watched tv, did some typing in my pyjamas in front of the tv and went for a run in the afternoon. i can highly recommend this option; i think i was crying out for it.

    hope everyone has a good day.
  • thanks for that offer tweety nice of you!

    got called out of work yesterday by the nursery as Little Gren's temperature was 39 degrees, they phoned my wife first and she told them to phone me because she couldn't be expected to leave work just like that - so I had to and I lost an afternoons pay whereas she wouldn't - still can't handle him when he is feeling poorly - managed to get him into the doctor who gave anti biotics and a lot better today altough he still had to go into nursery as I had to go to a meeting which required an earlier than normal start for the day and although wednesday is her day off and also the only day he doesn't go into nursery I had to pay for him to go into nursery so she didn't have to get up earlier than her normal 7:30


    Oh well back at work now
  • Oh Grendel

    Lots of get well wishes to mini Grendel from Mouselet and myself. Poor little angel. I am sorry Grendel and I don't know your other half and prob shouldn't say this but how could she let him go to nursery when he was poorly?? I know she had PND and things are not good but surely a bit of motherly love might have helped with bonding? I am sorry and I hope I haven't offended you. I know my hubby and Mouselet bonded a lot better since accident thing. She went to him for a get better cuddle when she tripped over on Sunday. Was a bit gutted, but pleased.

    Anyway awwww Tweety a lie in (green with envy). Nice. Will not get one of those until 3 weeks, hubbys compulsory overtime weekend this one. Then its GNR weekend next week and Sunderland play at home so Going to pasta party with sister and mum in law and Mouselet instead of Hubby. Going to try get gait analised as been having a few niggles I don't normally get. most of pre-mouselet shoes don't fit, but my runners were new a few weeks before preg. Nike doing it I think. See what happens.

    Mum in law here at mo, supposed to be doing housework so best crack on.
  • Sorry Grendel if you want to give me telling off will take it like a big girls blouse!!!!
  • Not offended at all - in fact sdhe asked me last night would I do the same in her situation and my reply upset her too when I said noway would I let him go in - but then knowing our financial situation if we were in a role reversal situation I wouldn't have him in nursery all day on a Monday when she is off (she likes a chill out day have not worked - unfortunatly I know what her limitations are in all this are and have to accept it with bitten tongue!

    She collected him around about 1 o'clock and I know that they have already had a falling out - which I think is quite sad as he is obvioulsy a bit under the weather

    Glad things are better between your oh and little mouslet and does that mean you and your sister have repaired some of the rift if she is going to the pasta party with you - whats your number for the GNR (not that I'll expect to be able to see you on the telly - I must admit and (I think it is probably heresy to talk to a geordie in this way) but on the two times I did it I found it quite over rated and a lot harder than I expected.
  • am going with sister in law sorry Grendel. Trying to type too fast and not proof reading (bad considering I used to be a secretary). My sister still does not want to know. Hubby on lates next week am going to try meet her at cafe where she works after work and see what heppens. My neice is home so going to meet her and see what happens. Mum told me to leave it a few more weeks, but feel the longer I leave it the harder its going to be.

    Its one of the nearer races for me to take part in. We had the Great Womens Run this year but we were in Scotland with in-laws. They booked a cottage and invited us along. Was nice.

    I ususally do the race for life too But have missed last two due to hubby's shifts. Am determined to do next years.

    Transport and Mouselet are usually the two reasons I now race closer to home. WAs only going to do 1 GNR but got hooked My nephew had Crohn's disease and was quite poorly, thats why I took up running again after injuring my knee and being told I was too overweight to be running. I thought I should raise some money for the cause. (my sister not being that interested). I was determined to do it as lots of people laughed and said I would either never do it (chicken out at last min or give up). So when crossed the finish line in 2;58 was chuffed.

    It is a hard course. I tend to get towards back as I hate it when everyone rushes past you, then you start and pass some near end of race.

    Race No 46091 I am a white number so will be toward back.

    Shame about OH. You need chill time I know that myself, but it will not be long before he grown up and at an age when he wants to be doing things with friends and not parents. They are not little for ever. Kept telling that to other 1/2 that she wouldn't be a baby forever. He now regrets he didn't spend as much time with her that he could have.
  • I do agree that you need to deal with it sooner rather than later – as the longer it goes on the harder it gets and more and more resentment builds up –

    I know what you mean about growing up so fast – to be honest I do think my wife does regret it as the relationships we both have with Nathan are completely different – I can’t remember when I last heard him tell her he loved her – yet he tells me almost daily – it must be hard and I know she resents me for it – and in that respect I can’t blame her – In her eyes I have been showing off that I can do stuff and she can’t, in my eyes I was trying to say look if I can so can you because I am nothing special - it hasn’t worked that way.

    Trouble is now whenever I am around he wants me not her and again I know that she finds it upsetting - trouble is you can’t force them to do stuff that they don’t want to do – in fact I have to almost bribe him to go and say goodbye in the morning and even then he won’t – I can’t do anymore than I do and all I can hope is that time will change things.

    I suppose to people on here that I must sound terribly big headed about what I do but to me I am just doing what needs to be done – I don’t always feel like getting up early or in the middle of the night but one of us have to!

    Will look out for you on the telly next weekend - will alos look out for a needle in the haystack!
  • Congrats as well for getting back into running and I don't believe that there is such a thing as to overweight.
  • Naw its not big headed you are a daddy. As you say someone has to get up in the morning/night when they need you. As I am the one not working it has to be me. I get a lie in every 3 weeks. I get to go to my craft class and running so I know I am lucky. There are people a lot worse off then me. But I will admit there are times I would kill to sit with a cuppa and a book or mag. It takes me a month nearly to read one copy of runners world. Last book I read took 8 weeks. Molly was 13 nearly 14 months before I got my kit out again and that was because if I didn't we were going to be divorced before our first wedding anniversary. I am not proud of how I acted before I went running, but I will admit I am a much happier person for running.

    Well tea duty calls

    Will wave at every camera I see instead of putting head down.

  • it's interesting reading your posts grendel because i am now seeing the PND from my husband's eyes and from mine. i too don't cope very well when mini tweety is ill. when we called the ambulance to her last week, hubby had to take over and he settled her into bed, even though it was my turn (we try to take it in turns) and he said he knows i don't cope very well when she's ill. i feel bad about that because i feel i should be able to cope because i'm her mummy, but something in my brain just panics. i want to look after her, but i just go into panic mode. it's suprising because i am a first aider and had to put things into action when a guy fell off his bike outside my house on monday evening (no helmet=right old smack on the head, blood everywhere) i coped with that; why can't i cope with my own daughter?
    i would LOVE to stay in bed until 7.30 every morning. i don't even think my husband would agree to that!!
    try the 'i'm going to say bye bye to mummy, would you like to?' he may want to and that hopefully could lead slowly to him doing it without prompting.
    hey batmouse, i'm a medical secretary! bought myself a coaster at the weekend that says 'just because i'm a medical secretary, doesn't mean i want to hear all about your ailments!' it is supporting my first coffee of the day as i was up with mini tweety at about 3.30am this morning. have absolutely no idea why she was up before the birds this morning, wish she could talk more and tell me!
    BM, definitely time for a new pair of shoes, methinks. but if they do recommend a new pair, don't wear them for the GNR if you get them at the expo; it might be blister city!

    good luck, mini tweety & i will be watching you whilst eating birthday cake (mini tweety is 3 on 1st october, hurrah!)

    have a good day everyone.
  • yikes, that was a long message!
  • Tweety I hope I have not offended you (but I do feel that you have faced up to and dealt with PND whereas OH doesn’t accept it – she is currently weaning herself off and I do feel now that she is starting to regress ) – but I have found it helpful to speak to you both about it and to listen to you and how you feel – I guess sometimes we are so close to our partners that things get missed along the way and don’t always pick up on how we all feel – I’ve never felt able to tell my wife how I feel about all this because I appreciate that in her state of mind she can’t do some of the things that I have taken on like getting up early during the night – know how you feel about the early rise I have sometimes started work at 9 o’clock having already been up 5/6 hours – but I think I have got used to it now.

    OH is also concerned that I might fall asleep when driving (I fell asleep whilst waiting at a roundabout once (she doesn’t drive)) but when she expressed this to the relate counsellor we saw the Relate Counsellor asked he why when we are going to go on a journey she doesn’t get up early and let me have a longer sleep -

    Have tried the I’m going to say good bye approach, he won’t even go upstairs now to say goodbye to her – Unfortunately he can say a lot (he has always been fluent since his first words at 11 months when he said here it is) and when I asked him this morning why he wouldn’t go and say goodbye he just said because I don’t like Mummy – she didn’t hear that thank goodness - Whether he is at an age where he can now think well she won’t come downstairs and say goodbye to me so why should I go up I don’t know.

    Am a bit annoyed with her as she refused to leave work Tuesday to collect him and he had to go to nursery yesterday when he was still a little under the weather, because she didn’t want to get up 30 minutes earlier so I could go to a meeting yet she now wants me to phone in sick for her next Friday and tell them that Nathan is poorly again so she won’t be in.

    I had to laugh about your comments about being a first aider as my sister in law is a highly qualified nurse has dealt with children adults etc etc etc, yet she goes to pieces when it is family!

    Oh well I can go on for a long time too.

    Have a good day all and I hope you all had some sleep last night.
  • Not much sleep. Chased a fly around for ages during the night. Got it shut in the bathroom eventually. But once disturbed took ages to get her back off. Then when I went to clean her teeth it was in her tooth mug so I flushed it down loo. Threw away toothbrush, tried to use spare that I had for emergencies and as its not her usual pink one we had a tantrum. 18 months old and knows her own mind. I don't stand a chance. So going to move tooth mugs into towel cupboard until we get a bathroom cabinet (when we start on bathroom which I dread to think as kitchen well behind schedule).

    Tired and Mol grumpy as she's not tired enough for nap, but she is tired. My jogger is out of action. Had a puncture on Tues. Hubby fixed it but part of the tyre popped out of wheel so can't use it. Just going to play in garden until hubby comes home then going into town to pick up tickets for Rocky Horror on Sat night.

    This parenting thing isn't easy. Anyone who says it is must be lying. I went out for a friends hen night on Sat. Was talking to a woman i used to work with saying how much I enjoy being a mum etc was saying how my little mini tornado could wreak the house in mins flat. She said by 18 months her 2 kids knew they could play with one or two toys but had to put some away before they could get out anymore and I should start and get her used to that now. She's only 18 months for god's sake shes still a baby. If we put her toys away on a night and I try to get her to help as fast as we get them put away, she can get a few more out. Okay I understand that sooner or later there will come a time when she will help me put them away and leave them there, but 18 months, by 2 they could dress themselves. Oh yeah... she can undress herself at a rate of knots if no buttons. By the time I had finished talking to her I felt like some really bad mother as I allowed her to get out what toys and books she wants. When there are too many out we do put some away. I came home and told hubby and he told me that it was all a load of s**t and that if I wanted to bring my baby up in a prisoner of war camp I could but when he has her if the room looks like a bouncing bomb gone through it several times and thats the way it would be.

    She got upstairs strewn with books as I have put the clothes away, but she kept bringing books and talking about them. I will tidy up again at the end of the day.

    anyway must go I need to put some more clothes awey and go get a coffee.

    Hang in there Grendel. Through you talking about your OH as tweety says I can see how hubby must have felt when Mouselet rejected him. He was resentful too. He thought I took great pleasure in the fact she wouldn't go to him and I didn't. It always worried me.


    Got to go rescue mouselets 'baby' Mouse jammed her dolls head between cot bars again.
  • Its good to have this thread Grendel it does help
  • This bad Mother/father thing needs to stop now – as far as I am concerned as long as you your husband, me my wife tweety and her husband are doing the best we can then we are not bad parents – bad parents beat abuse et etc etc you get the picture – we are all doing our best and that is all anyone of us can do – I’m not a bad dad or a good dad, I’m just a dad and I’m Nathan’s dad, OH is just a Mum, she not a good mum or a bad mum just doing the best she can and if at the end of the day that’s not good enough for anyone else then so what it’s not anyone else’s business.

    One of the things I hated my wife doing before she was diagnosed with PND was going to the Mother and baby groups (although I do appreciate that they do have their place) because all I ever heard from her was how perfect everyone else’s babies were and how they slept through the night and how everyone else was coping and she wasn’t – but when I met some of these girls husbands and asked about it all the truth was different and they weren’t all coping and perfect – it just seemed that none of them wanted to put up their hands and be the first to say help I’m not coping.

    As far as getting stuff out, our place looks like a bomb has gone off and I tend to gather stuff up that he has finished with – and yes at 3 ½ he can dress himself although he doesn’t do it and is usually to busy.

    Seem to be making giant strides forward with the potty training and he was quite upset that he had an accident yesterday and I notice he had dry pull ups this morning when we got up and he nearly filled the potty!

    Oh well work calls – chin up bm you are with out doubt a great mum doing the best you can. No one can ask for more
  • grendel - you haven't offended me in the slightest; if anything, i welcome your comments as i said it helps me to see things from another point of view. i know that when i realised i was starting to try and wean the antids, I felt like i was losing control, which i hated and even though there have been times when i ask myself 'why do i take these tablets?' i know they are helping me live a normal life again.

    grendel, it sounds like the only way your OH will take on more time with mini grendel is if she is forced to. how would it go donw if you reduced to take the time off and she had to do it or is that a relationship ending sort of thing? please don't think i am trying to offend anyone; i am just trying to think of anything that could possibly make life easier for family grendel.

    mother and baby groups were both good and bad for me. i met up with other mums that turned out to have PND (although one has gone on to have another with no PND, something i will never do). i still unfortunately remember a woman with 3 kids under 3 and when i said i sometimes never got out of the house until after 3pm, she cheerfully chirped 'oh, we're all out of the door by 9.30am.' well, bully for you dear. grrr.

    our front room generally looks like a pseudo war zone about 10 minutes after mini tweety gets in there. i generally give up clearing it up until either 1)she has left the room or 2)someone has tripped/slipped on something she has strewn across the room. she seems to enjoy watching me clear things up and then seeing my expression when she tips it all out again. ho hum.

    hope you get the jogger fixed batmouse. i never got one of those, i think mini tweety is too big for one of those now. we do have one of those trailers for the bikes though, she really likes that.

    i think we are all FABULOUS mums and dads. i won't have my kid living in a boot camp and i try my best, as i am sure we all do (when we have the energy!)

    keep smiling all :-)
  • and well done on staying dry last night mini grendel!
  • I'm glad I didn't offend - the direction of this thread seems to have veered somewhat since the original post!

    My concern if OH forced to do anything is for little grendel - she can be quite stroppy with him if pushed into doing anything she doesn't want to - she comes from a very selfish family (she'll admit that) so I have to be the voice of reason in it all and get on and do the stuff that needs to be done - the problem is, I lose pay if I take time off she doens't.

    And hopefully we are on the way to cracking the potty thing!
  • I think it may be a good time for a little more information about my family.
    As I have mentioned before, I have two “kids”
    Simon who is 26, and Luke who is 23.
    They are both currently living at home with us.
    Also here is Simon’s young lady (who is very young at 17)
    Simon was an intelligent child, but he started teething early and it lasted for ever.
    He is and has always been nocturnal.
    He would be awake (teething) and wanting to play at 3am. I am not human at 3am, and when I hear of people who have been convicted of shaking their kids, I have to think there but for the grace of god go I, because I have found myself repeatedly slamming the little sod into his pillow, which he thought was a good game!
    Luke however was born prematurely. He is in a wheelchair with cerebral palsy, which includes in his case stiff arms and legs, and requires some level of care throughout the day and night, though he usually sleeps well.
    The psychological stress that this placed on Mrs BD was and still is immense.
    Luke has spent 3 years at a residential college for people with disabilities, and now has carers, who look after him for a number of hours per week, which causes its own problems, but gives us all some independence.
    He is trying to get some suitable accommodation away from home.
    We have had our share of accidents and emergencies with Simon.
    We have had more than our share with Luke, and when you drop someone who can not save themselves, you can feel pretty damn guilty.
    ps this is a very long post for me.
  • (((((((((BD))))))))))

    (((((((((((Mrs BD))))))))))))

    I understand the parental anger with the kids, and the physical side of it. As a kid I remember the odd occasion being a recipient, and not liking it one bit. As a parent I don't want to go there, but find myself from time to time on, near, or over, the brink.

    I believe that all kids need to know where the line is drawn. But the problem is that all parents can't remember either to draw the line in the first place, or to remember where they out it. And I'm guilty on both charges.

    Enough negativity.
    I'm rather hoping that my 10 year old daughter has finally discovered how to make puppy eyes at me in order to get her own way. I can be conned. Please.
  • Thank you for that david as it reminds us there are worse things than sleepless nights -
  • All of you get what rest you can when you can.
    Too many sleepless nights will kill you.
  • Wots sleep???. Had an hour and a half in bed this afternoon, was shattered. Mouselet was really ratty. Got to the point I picked her up at 2.00 and went to bed. Whithin 5 mins we were asleep. Paying for it now she's running up and down her cot. Had a good night at the Rocky Horror though, it was excellent. Went for a curry afterwards. Oh I am in heaven. It sounds like she finally collapsed in a sleeping heap. Went to messy play yesterday. Loved every min. We got there late as couldn't get on a bus. But enjoyed the hour out of the house. No she hasn't heard cries.

    Ended up soaking on my run last night. The haevens opened just as I was going out the door. The dog tried to go home on 3 occasions. There wasn't a dry bit on my body (Which will teach me to put off buying a new waterproof jacket), but Mouselet needed new shoes on Thursday which were £25.00 so that was a good chunk of my jacket savings gone. Spent £40 and only went in Clarks and Boots.

    Was worried about my friend she was supposed to be coming for lunch yest and didn't. I got a txt to say she was feeling really low and she might be late then nothing. She didn't answer my calls. Was on verge of going to see if she was ok, when got txt to say she was tired and would speak to me today, but I had switched phone off when I went to bed with Mouse. So I dunno whats up well I do. Her son died of Leukemia 6 years ago last month. She got no family and is divorced. She hasn't had anyone to talk with over it and its all bottled up just waiting to come out. She will not discuss him very much. I try to get her to, but she won't. Then she has days where she will not get in contact. I get worried. Oh nightmare....

    anyway Mouselet gone off so I am going to let the dog back in and have a few mins read before bed. Hubby watching Ryder cup.

    night all.
  • No have tried. She does 2 jobs and says she too tired all the time. Have casually left latest runners world article on depression open. But she didn't turn up.

    Got a text this am to say she was going to one job then straight to the other today. She is off tomorrow and was looking for something to do, but Hubby on 3-11 p. shift so we usually go out for a walk with Mouselet and dog. Have a coffee on the seafront if not raining. Then am going baby clothes shopping with Mum as mouselet needs a few pairs of warm trousers and some tights in case we get some nasty weather. She grown out of most of hers. Have offered for her to come over in between but am loathe to change plans as could end up twiddling thumbs from hubby going out until he comes in after 12.00a.m.

    She at other job 6 until 9 tomorrow evening.

    Ah well mothering duty calls.
  • Morning all

    Had a bad night with teething mouselet. She ended up in bed with us at 6.00 in desperation. She took over the bed and fell asleep. We all woke up at 10.00 a.m. Dunno if I feel good or bad. For some reason over last week she has stopped eating breakfast. Think it could be teeth. She eating the dried fruit from my porridge though. Little tinker she is.

    I made her cry yesterday by shouting at her. She climbed into her jogger and was about to launch herself head first into her travel cot which was right up to the fire place, which is a big stone monster. (which is going during the christmas new year break its alrady half demolished when we discovered it was coming away from the wall.) i got such a fright. I shouted. Then I felt awful cos she was sobbing. I always park the jogger against the wall with the brake on, but I forgot saturday in my haste to have a nap. So she managed to push it to the travel cot. Was loading the dishwasher at the time. I need eyes in the back of my head. She was quite tired at this point and was asking for mummy cuddle so we went to bed again. I only intended to get her to sleep then go clean up bathroom. Ended up asleep for an hour and a half. My sleep pattern up the river.

    When hubby came in from his golf competition and I told him he said well at least you stopped her from splitting her head wide open on the fireplace.

    I really do need eyes in the back of my head.

    Hubby on lates this week, which is my least favourite shift. We always end up arguing. Got a stiff neck to boot. Think I must have been lying in a wierd position on Saturday night. Worse today then yest.

    Ah well. Must go do some housework. Hubby in garden finishing Mouselets playpen.

    Hope you all had good weekends.
  • BM – I know you need eyes in the back of your head but you really can’t worry about what didn’t happen - it might have but it didn’t – Nathan now launches himself at me from the top the stairs so I can catch him – he doesn’t seem to realise that it is different when he does it in the swimming pool!

    He has developed a cough now following whatever he had last week which is keeping me awake – ended up asleep on the floor last night next to his bed – but hey ho that’s just one of those things as my Mum so infuriatingly keeps saying –

    Read about your friend who lost her son 6 years ago, out little niece died of leukaemia 4 years ago next month a day short of her 1st birthday – can still remember how I felt watching the ceremony and internment – it must be very difficult for her as she seems to have it all on her own shoulders – all you can do is to be there to offer support whenever you can.

    Glad you had a good night the other night – we are going to have a night out in a couple of weeks time – hoping to go to the pictures this time as when we go for a meal we end up talking about Nathan all night –

    Am trying to keep awake at the moment - oh well duty calls – take care and keep posting.

    and looking forward to hearing about the GNR (this Sunday?)
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