Things you want to say but can't

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  • CazSoul wrote (see)
    When I answer the phone at work after the recommended 2 rings with the standard Good morning/afternoon *insert name of company* and you say to me "Is that *insert name of company*" I'll give you a clue, if it wasn't *insert name of Company* I would've f*cking said something else when I answered the phone.   I speak very clearly when I answer the phone as it is part of my job so please pay attention f*ckwit!!! 
    Yeah that gets on my tits too.  I always answer in a similar fashion, and say my name, then people ask to speak to me and I say 'speaking' and feel slightly deflated that i've had to say that because it means, yet again, folk just aren't listening....
  • Did someone say sommat....image

    image

  • JWrunJWrun ✭✭✭
    CazSoul wrote (see)
    When I answer the phone at work after the recommended 2 rings with the standard Good morning/afternoon *insert name of company* and you say to me "Is that *insert name of company*" I'll give you a clue, if it wasn't *insert name of Company* I would've f*cking said something else when I answered the phone.   I speak very clearly when I answer the phone as it is part of my job so please pay attention f*ckwit!!! 

    ARRRRRGH!!! That drives me NUTS

    I will even leave a pause when I pick up the phone so people can realise I've picked up the phone and start to listen and they STILL don't hear me - WHY DID YOU RING IF YOU'RE NOT INTERESTED????!!!!!

    Edited to say - i'm really not an agro person but i do really like this thread - I felt so much calmer on the drive in this morning image

  • Muttley,  some banks are better than others - my Halifax branch not only opens at 8.00 am most mornings, it also has machines that allow you to pay in cheques image

    No queue, and no sales chat.  Result image

    Sorry - that's not really in the spirit of the thread!





    Um.....  I did want to say to a woman walking along with an umbrella up when it was no longer raining, that it wasn't raining any more.  But I didn't.

  • LIVERBIRD wrote (see)

    Did someone say sommat....image

    image

    Shut it you! image
  • She is WELL better looking than you are! Do you have an enormous penis or a sparkling personality?

    *edited because Wilkie's about!image

  • You know these T-shirts you get that say things like "Thank your girlfriend for me" or "I'm an animal in bed"???

    Make you look like a complete tosser.

    And please don't wear things with F**K on the front because I hate them and little children can read too.

  • LIVERBIRD wrote (see)
    You CAN'T always say what you really mean Stu! What if it's really hurtful?
    generally don't think anything really hurtful but will say what I think and "own" it. Not easy at times thoughimage 
  • Dear John on the answering machine -please do what it says and leave a number - I know more than one John and I'm not ringing them all up to see if it's you - and I know you said "hello...it's John from Donegal - ring me back" - but that doesn't really narrow it down that much either.

    Thank you 

  • imageAs this is the thread for things you really can’t say. Dear *large workplace I have to deal with every day, somewhere in the south of England* as your continual incompetence has yet again caused a error to be made regarding a employee. From now on every time they phone up distressed and worried about stuff I’m going to point out to them it’s down to yourselves supplying the wrong information and your failure in even the simplest tasks. Hopefully this will result in yourselves getting a good ticking off from everybody you work with and I won’t have to use glove puppets and a abacus again to make you understand what you should have done you cretinous fool.  image
  • LIVERBIRD wrote (see)

    She is WELL better looking than you are! Do you have an enormous penis or a sparkling personality?

    *edited because Wilkie's about!image


    Is that directed at me? image  Might be true right enough anyway.....  Or did someone I have on ignore just post something after me? image

    BTW I don't have an enormous penis, though i wouldn't mind finding a man with one of those attached.  i know some enormous penises though image

  • ooh back on to things you want to say but can't:

    "You, mister are very, very hot, and I often wonder what you would look like naked.  You are very nice too, and seem to be perfect in every way, except of course for the fact you are not lying naked in my room, which is less than perfect.  Although it sounds as if I am only obsessed with your fit bod, I am not.  You are nice to chat too as well. Nomnomnomnomnomnomnomnom image"

  • image Well thankyou I still got it. image
  • Stu www.coastersgb.co.uk wrote (see)
    LIVERBIRD wrote (see)
    You CAN'T always say what you really mean Stu! What if it's really hurtful?
    generally don't think anything really hurtful but will say what I think and "own" it. Not easy at times thoughimage 
    Do you mean that if you see someone wearing a hideous dress, or with an unflattering hair-do, you go up to them and tell them so?  image
  • Dear best mate
    I'm sorry but the wife you adore is mad
    She's controlling, paranoid, spiteful and wants nothing more to dominate every part of your life and turn you into someone you are not
    I know a relationship is give and take but how much can she take. I would tell you this on person but you wouldn't listen.
    Hopefully she will find someonelse
  • I look down on you beacuse you read

    • Daily Mail
    • Sun
    • Mirror
    • Star
    • Hello
    • OK!
    • Nuts
    • Zoo
    • Closer
    • Heat

    ---

    Harry Potter is not a great read, you're an adult. Read an adult book

    ---

    Profiling does work

    ---

    In 99% of cases, Pregnancy is your choice. I will make allowances for you at our place of work, but it is your choice.I tire of hearing how tired/sick/craving you are.

    ---

    Scotland should support itself with it's own taxes if it wants to choose how to spend them

    ---

    Alcoholism is not a disease, it is a choice

    ---

    Smoking around your small child makes me think a lot less of you

    ---

    Young people will regret tattoos and should really think more before daubing themselves with them

    ---

    Don't get high and mighty about speed cameras, they're massive and painted yellow and 30 is a LIMIT

    ---

    If motorcyclists want respect will 90% of them stop driving like absolute wankers.

    ---

    Crocs are a mistake of humanity

    God I could carry on for hours.....

  • Dear Sir/Madam (you have an unhelpful e-mail address), if you want me to remove your details from our mailing database why don't you give me a clue as to your name and/or address. It makes my job a lot easier.
  • Oi scaggy neighbour, stop getting pished out of your tiny brain and then calling your wife/girlfriend every name under the sun through the locked front door just because she won't let you in at 2 in the morning.  Cut out the middle man and go straight to the police station when you leave the pub so the rest of the street can get some sleep. 

    Oh and whilst we're on the matter, MY driveway is for MY car and people visiting ME not for you to cut across to visit next door or play football on you f*cking eejit!!!

  • JWrunJWrun ✭✭✭

    You got a cob-on again sprint? image

    Some of your comments show some naivety (just being honest) but I do agree with you on Crocs being a mistake of humanity and WTF is it about Harry Potter???? image

  • Sprint - I got my first tattoo when I 28 and don't regret it. My second one was added when I was 34, don't regret that one either. They are both in bit of me usually covered up tho and not for public consumption.

    I agree about the crocs

  • AllNewTB wrote (see)

     They are both in bit of me usually covered up tho and not for public consumption.

    have you got a tattoed arse?
  • goldbeetle wrote (see)
    have you got a tattoed arse?
    I used to but we split up earlier this year.
  • Sprint for the line wrote (see)

    ---

    Alcoholism is not a disease, it is a choice

    ---

    debatable whether alcoholism is a disease , fine but choice!? . Nobody would "choose" to be dependent on booze to the detriment of their loved ones, health and quality of life.  People choose to drink and risk falling into alcoholism but they do not "choose" to be alcohlic like they choose their socks at Marks & Spencer.  Saying that simply simplifies a complicated issue as if you can easily "choose" to step out of it.
  • Goldbeetle - no and as I said, they're not for public consumption.
  • MadameO wrote (see)
    goldbeetle wrote (see)
    have you got a tattoed arse?
    I used to but we split up earlier this year.
    Aha! boom boom
  • AllNewTB wrote (see)
    Goldbeetle - no and as I said, they're not for public consumption.
    gooooo on give us a clue image
  • I felt a reluctance to say this (that is near as I get to feeling I can't). People who use a watered down concept of "choice" to somehow blame "addicts" or "fat people" when they are down ought to be in the grips of the worst addiction possible and suffer mass obesity in the future. Let us listen to their views again a few years down the line.
  • CazSoul wrote (see)
    When I answer the phone at work after the recommended 2 rings with the standard Good morning/afternoon *insert name of company* and you say to me "Is that *insert name of company*" I'll give you a clue, if it wasn't *insert name of Company* I would've f*cking said something else when I answered the phone.   I speak very clearly when I answer the phone as it is part of my job so please pay attention f*ckwit!!! 

    As someone who generally rings up from a mobile I do often struggle with this one and will confirm I have the right company as what generally happens from my end is......"Hello *muffled version that could be company name or could be something else entirely*" . I probably do come across like an ignorant f*uckwit that doesn't listen but last time this happened when I asked "Is that *company name*" the response I got somehow sounded excatly half way between yes and no! 

  • Stu www.coastersgb.co.uk wrote (see)

    debatable whether alcoholism is a disease , fine but choice!? . Nobody would "choose" to be dependent on booze to the detriment of their loved ones, health and quality of life.  People choose to drink and risk falling into alcoholism but they do not "choose" to be alcohlic like they choose their socks at Marks & Spencer.  Saying that simply simplifies a complicated issue as if you can easily "choose" to step out of it.
    Yes it is a choice Stu. Alcoholics choose to take the first drink, they make the choice to carry on drinking, they can make the choice to stop if they wish to. It's not necessarily an easy choice to stop, but it is a choice. It's pretty simple when you're drinking, your relationship with the bottle is the primary relationship in your life, ALL ELSE is secondary to that.There are inherent risks to alcohol withdrawal, such as fitting, as I'm sure you know, so withdrawal is not any easy choice to make by any stretch of the imagination, but there are plenty of ways that you can be supported through it. The first step to sobriety is admitting you have a problem, the second is making the decision to stop. I know this as 10 years ago I was regularly drinking over 200 units a week.
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