Beeping at women runners

Start of rant....image

Why is it,that some men think that "honking their horns","beeping at women runners" is a good thing or a laugh ?  would they like it if their wives..daughters or mothers would have to endure this harrasment

My wife went out for a run not so long back and had three of these idiots,and at least one shouted at her (she did not hear what the prick had to say as the car was going to fast)  do they not get how vunerable a woman feels on her own and the effect this can have ?

Unfortunatly this is a common occurance for my wife and as we have a two year old,we cannot run together so we have bought a treadmill, so speed work can be completed indoors,but long runs will still have to be run outdoors.

Rant Over...image

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Comments

  • its hard to tell sometimes what the beeps are.......lots of them are just from friends or other runners.....even runners who don't know you beep as a sign of encouragement.....although some beeps are meant to just wind you up.......

    I think they just shock me sometimes when i get deep in thought.......

    often friends tell me that they beeped me when i was running but I didn't look.......i try to explain how many beeps i get.....

    I don't get scared or intimidated by them ....the shouts can be just them trying to be witty to impress friends.a bit like you get going past a group of kids or a pub....

    I wonder why she is intimidated by the car beeps but not by the passers by on the street.....
  • Most women I know just laugh it off.
  • I don't know why they feel to need to do it. I just assume they're all encouraging - maybe it's a state of mind thing.

    I have to say that most of the shouts I've been able to comprehend have been encouraging, so maybe the beeps are too.

  • I often get beeped by friends.  I'd prefer it if they didn't as it always scares the life out of me and I never see who is behind the wheel.  Maybe strangers beep me too, but I wouldn't be able to tell them from friends.
  • I understand what you are saying but it is just a beep - drivers beep for a number of reasons. As a woman I have learnt (slowly I'll admit) that a beep is not a threatening gesture. This is my take on it...and is not a judgement on how your wife feels or indeed your feelings. I agree that people who shout random and sometimes moronic comments are looking for peer approval - runners are a natural target with our hi viz, lycra clothes but this is just a fleeting comment.

    If she does feel vulnerable, would she consider carrying a personal alarm? There are lots of types to choose from, like this one - designed for runners. This would give her an added layer of protection (if you see what I mean) and might mean that you feel a little more at ease when she is out running alone. I realise I am very lucky where I live - we have lots of street lights, a fairly small town where people recognise the runners and we do watch out for each other. But I also know that not everyone has this experience.

    Really hope she stays safe...and definitely look into getting a personal alarm!

  • I have had all sort of things shouted at me over the years. Eggs thrown, dog attacks. We run with the public and the public can be assholes sometimes. get over it!
  • WilkieWilkie ✭✭✭

    I get beeped quite a lot - it doesn't make me feel intimidated or threatened, though, and I just ignore them.

    Sometimes it's friends, but I rarely recognise the car and only find out later "I saw you running the other day and beeped...."

  • I had a convertible full of girls beeping at me one summer. They passed me a few times at different points on my route. It didn't really bother me, but it was disappointing that none of them flashed their norks at me.
  • I'm a woman and this sort of thing never bothers me to be quite honest - people without two brain cells to rub together really aren't worth bothering about. 

    While I don't doubt for a moment that your wife feels genuinely intimidated by this she really can't let idiots like this dictate her life - otherwise where will it end?

    As mimaduck suggests, perhaps carrying a personal alarm would make her feel safer or perhaps it's a case of just learning to accept it. 

  • It's a symptom of the phallocentric hegemony.
  • I agree with you Warkie - if they wouldn't walk up to the same woman in a pub and say I was just admiring your arse or whatever why is it OK to beep at them when they are running. It isn't just encouragement as how many men get beeped regularly - or is it just me that doesn't! It's really just a lesser version (OK maybe much lesser) of the way in some countries it's common for women in public to get their arses felt by men.

    Funny what being in a car does for people's bravery. Similar to how plenty feel it necessary to castigate cyclists for riding 2 abreast perfectly legally - I normally gesture for them to pull over and discuss it and I've yet to have one take me up on the offer.

    Having said that I agree you can't let these sort of dickheads get to you.
  • I don't mind the beeping, and i don't get intimidated by it......but it sometimes makes me jump out of my skin if i'm not expecting it - usually resulting in an expletive of my own!!! image

    However, i find that most 'verbal' either from cars or passers by, only comes when i'm running with others....and very rarely when i'm on my own.  

    Maybe their one braincell does comprehend that this could be intimidating to a lone runner.

  • popsider wrote (see)
    I agree with you Warkie - if they wouldn't walk up to the same woman in a pub and say I was just admiring your arse or whatever why is it OK to beep at them when they are running. It isn't just encouragement as how many men get beeped regularly - or is it just me that doesn't! It's really just a lesser version (OK maybe much lesser) of the way in some countries it's common for women in public to get their arses felt by men. Funny what being in a car does for people's bravery. Similar to how plenty feel it necessary to castigate cyclists for riding 2 abreast perfectly legally - I normally gesture for them to pull over and discuss it and I've yet to have one take me up on the offer. Having said that I agree you can't let these sort of dickheads get to you.


    Are we not reading too much into this?

    I, for one, have no idea what a beep means as a thing in itself - it could be any one of a number of things, it doesn't have to equal sexual aggression.

    I think it's already been established that on the last occasion Mrs W didn't actually hear what was being said to her so we can't glean anything from that either.

  • Agree with Screamy.

    Those comments I've been able to decipher have always been positive or encouraging. I choose to interpret any comments and beeps as positive. Doesn't matter how they're meant, I take them as positives. Life's too short to get het up about this, imo.

  • Same here HL.  I chose to think that any negative comments that are aimed at me were intended as positive ones, but the individual didn't have the brain cells to communicate effectively.  I realised this one day when I was spectating at a race.  One of the marshals kept saying things that I thought were inappropriate to the runners.  It turned out that she wasn't a runner herself, but had been recruited through the local scout group so had no idea of things from a runners viewpoint.  She thought that here comments were motivating, when in fact they were coming out as patronising.  Once I explained this to her she was happy to shout out more positive comments.
  • TimeaJTimeaJ ✭✭✭

    I get beeped almost all the time I run on the main roads in High Wycombe. If no one beeps at me, I start to think something must be wrong LOL.

    It does not really bother me, I do not look at it as a threat. If someone wanted to hurt me, they would jump out of their car and grab me (provided they can outrun me...) As Seren Nos is saying, people can beep at you for many reasons and some of the reasons may be good ones. People who beep you because they want to mock you while you are running must be quite miserable.

    I am sorry this is bothering your wife so much and I hope this will not stop her from enjoying running outside.

  • Some random chav told me to "go faster" at the weekend.

    You have a choice to engage or ignore: Do you abuse the numskull that probably can't even tell you his own name? Do you stop and explain to said moron that actually you are running a long way and that long runs are meant to be slow or do you just ignore and carry on?

    It's number 3 all the time unless said chav is fat and is stuffing his face with junk food in which case it's 1 as A) he deserves it and B) he won't be able to chase you image

  • Screamapillar wrote (see)

    Some random chav told me to "go faster" at the weekend.

    You have a choice to engage or ignore: Do you abuse the numskull that probably can't even tell you his own name? Do you stop and explain to said moron that actually you are running a long way and that long runs are meant to be slow or do you just ignore and carry on?

    It's number 3 all the time unless said chav is fat and is stuffing his face with junk food in which case it's 1 as A) he deserves it and B) he won't be able to chase you image

    Or do you chose to interpret that as encouragement?  Lets face it, what little the non-running public know about running is linked to televised athletics or marathons where the objective is to win.  How can we expect them to understand that some of us run for other reasons and that there are several aspects to training- only one of which involved working on speed.
  • Mrs Warkie is a tough little cookie and was just moaning about it really ..it's more to do with me and my general grumpy outlook most of the time image

    In future please ignore all of my posting ....image

  • Nope, didn't see the moaning...perfectly allowed to be concerned as to your wife's safety...I think it's in the small print of the marriage contract image

    I would recommend a personal alarm though if her routes take her on less well lit areas/less safe areas. The ila alarms are brilliant, and not hugely pricey either.

  • Doesn't it all depend on your general mood and outlook - if you're feeling chirpy the beeps are encouragement - probably from a neighbour who recognises you. If you're tired and having a bad hair day it's almost certainly car load of bullies looking for an excuse to get violent. image

  • Keep in mind that, although they seem to be reported quite often, physical attacks are extremely rare. There's a big step from shouting or beeping at a runner to taking them on in a scuffle.
  • On a more general issue, I've on occasion gesticulated at other drivers for doing stupid things, but most of the time now I feel my life is more important than letting them know they've been stupid. I think the tipping point was when a car behind beeped when we were at some red lights. My wife was driving, but from the passenger seat I made a non-rude gesture at the driver - kind of shrugging my shoulders as if to say 'what?' The car pulled onto the other side of the road and the passenger wound down the window and chucked a full can of coke at the driver's window - which, thankfully, was not open. Terrible waste of coke, of course, but the interesting point was that both driver and passenger were 20-something women. The world is full of arseholes of both genders.
  • I had to tell my nephew last week about the "bus stop wankers" story. He was leaning about my car window and shouting. Didn't want any bus stop wankers grabbing my throat at the traffic lights.
  • Johnny Blaze wrote (see)
    It's a symptom of the phallocentric hegemony.
    Is that the same as willy waving?  because I reckon beeping at female runners, is just that.
  • Warkie

    hi mate

    doubt you know me, but i'd try and rise above it all personally, as long as no harm was done

    keep wel lalways

    Mick

  • Cheers for the messages ..i am pretty well chilled most of the time and glad to hear most of the women runners are not bothered by it that much image

    The pesonal alarm is a good idea ..  image

    Now all of you women out there wolf whistling at me when i am running past ...image.....image

  • If I was able to wolf whistle then I am sure you would be worth whistling at Warkieimage
  • I don't agree that personal alarms are a good idea. Set one off one day and see how many people pay attention. Even yelling Fire fire or something like that would get more attention.

    FWIW, attackers generally normally target for vulnerable women ie with their arms full, distracted for some reason etc and not a woman who is running and therefore would have a greater chance of escape. If your wifeis concerned about her safety at other times, something like a defence spray would be far more effective at helping her escape. Knowing some basic self-defense moves, how to use her keys etc to defend herself may also improve her confidence.

  • It is true that I once set a personal alarm off by accident at work and not a single person came running.  In fact, when questioned everyone said that they thought they had heard something...

    We were given the alarms as the job was quite physically hazardous and we often worked on our own.  The idea of the alarm was that if you got into trouble then you could summon help from people in neighbouring areas so people should have been listening out for these alarms.

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