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Outlaw 2012 race reports
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Nice RR Coach, great time after such little recovery from IMCDA
No I dont think so, Rosey is surely ahead of me and Mon must be storming ahead in the distance. There might be a few others with a good number of finishes too.
Well, here is the guide to getting it wrong!
Pre Race
Bit nervous about the whole thing, especially my bike cut off demon, but when Coach Barlos sauntered into the bar like the seasoned old hack that he is, having just done IM Coeur d’Alene the weekend before, suddenly it all seemed OK.
As a result, slept fine, up no problem, no panic, no shaking like 3 years ago. No need for extra 2 poos pre race, just simple matter of fact doing it. That’s what makes Coach Barlos such a gem. Muchos gracias always CB.
Swim
Got in early, waited for the girly squeal as the icy water defeated the zip on the wettie, but nothing, cripes it’s warm. Hung around slowest edge of slowest bay, knowing that my swim cough would put people off. No idea why it does it but every swim in OW sees me churning out slime for the ducks to feed on. All go and good grief this water is vile and tastes of shite. Bleuurrgghh! Stroke immediately goes to pot, no more than 3 sculls at a time before breaststroke and another coughing fit as the lifeguard in the canoe lurks to catch his first customer of the day. Brief moment of panic as I sight and aim for the sun, check behind and I am waaaay last. Oops. But my kind of odds. 500M and the cough settles 250M earlier than expected. God I loved those distance boards. Engines finally online so on we go. Started picking off stragglers quite quickly and joined the back of a small pack. Had a brief rest at the turn and noticed my back was getting sore. Started off in again and steadily picked off a few more before Mr Ziggy Zaggy (he turns up in ALL my races to annoy me) piled across my front at twice my stroke rate and then some (something he repeated half a dozen times). Started to feel a bit sick, got worried, but it wore off. Developed a weird stroke which seemed to help the old back stretch a bit without actually stopping swimming. If I stuck my arse in your face repeatedly, sorry. Although return trip was a bit lardy, emerged relatively unscathed and it was actually easier than I thought.
Secretly hoped for 1.30 but got 1.40. 5 min PB. Yay!
T1 13 mins and under 15 (my target) 12 min PB! Yay! But they did say “cutoff” a lot while I was in there.
Bike
Necked an anti inflammatory and a couple of paracetomol as per plan. Going round lake, felt desperately sorry for lady being pulled out about 3/4 distance of swim. She was smiling. Then 2 hours of the most hilarious riproaring fun on a bike. One way conversations with coach Bassos on the upflats and was easily reigning in riders on Oxwhatsit upflat. Averaging 16.5 mph. Back hurting by now so at 2 hours dived into the first codeine hit and 5.5 hours of pain management began. Relief, then the long slow into the wind upflat which cut through everything like it wasn’t there. By Christ it hurt like a hot knife stuck in my sacro joint and I am loathe to admit it but I cried. Left turn, I had to get off. 2 mins rest and relief. Off we go again, different terrain profile and less pain but average speed was down. 2 hours later and about halfway, next batch of anti inflamms and paracetomol and speed rises again. Approaching the oarsum Pirate feed station, I wondered why I hadn’t caught Siggy, if Soupy was going to be there and nearly got wiped out by some twat cutting across me duelling and drafting with his mate. I think they were trying to catch the big invisible peloton 200 yards ahead that racers all saw and motorbikes all missed. Didn’t stop the first time, if I had, I would have bawled again and not got back on. Time for hit 2 of the codeine at 6 hours and the pain receded a bit. But I began to feel sick. Forced down a bar and felt quite oily so reverted to gels and felt, er, quite oily. Then began to ride a bit with Podds, a bit with Trogs, a bit with the asian guy who registered as last finisher, passed a “Helen” pirate, sorry didn’t recognise Little Sis I think. Then it absolutely pissed down. Ha ha. Binned a bottle in the excellent other feed station “goal” (which sorry guys is better than the shopping trolley, we neeed a goal). Second pass of the PFS, had a hug with Soupy and replenished both bottles but was pretty much away with the fairies by then. Got to mile 106 and discovered it is actually the longest mile on the circuit I swear. Rode in with Podds, said hello to FB and dismounted to find I was walking in the cycling position. But the relief when I managed to stand up, Oh My!
Target was cutoff, got in with about an hour and a quarter to spare. Yay! Ouch!
T2 about 6 minutes. Yay!
Run
Exited feeling strong but a little sore, screamed at my Sherpa, “I made the run!” I was on the run. I had made it to the run of the IM! Demons conquered, I was on for it! Rio’s picture says it all! I was soooo happy. First lap of the lake was a run of sorts with a pee, bad ITB twinges and the Major hurling much needed abuse. So I walked more. Few crisps. I was a bottle down on the planned bike nutrition and maybe a gel and a bar but I was still feeling a bit sick. Lots of nods to fellow pirates (Aarggh’s had long dried up by the time I was out there). Finally saw Siggy bimbling along happily. Had a hug with Saffers. Wees were not much of but at least the right colour. Made the turn and saw Coach Barlos on the way back. “I am going to have it this time Barlos! “ I shouted. Lap two, linked up with Podds, we ran/walked the Pirate ensemble together. Agreed that nutrition not as important if you are walking, which we were. I stopped to pee at the halfway feed station and chased her to catch up. Every time I ran, I felt sick, if I walked it was OK. Came by Cake who was on sterling form, admitted he had been drowning his sorrows and staggered with us a bit, which was a really nice gesture, cheers mate. Time was good, on for a 15.30 to 15.45 finish and Podds hadn’t told me to shut up yet (woman has the patience of a saint). Said I was feeling a bit chilly but pushed on to the turn point feed station. As we came back the 20 yards to the bridge, I said, “actually, I don’t feel so good”. Podds said that I didn’t look so hot. Stopped by the bridge/tunnel, asked Podds to go on and leant against the wall. Coach Barlos stopped but by now the whole world was spinning and although he offered to stop and stay (true sportsman) I asked him to go on. I felt the world start to close in and thought that the concrete would be very hard so moved to the grass and began a “controlled descent” to the floor. Bang. Game over. Conscious, shaking, apparently very cold to the touch, all circulation withdrew from fingers and they went into Raynauds white. Hello Paramedic. And purely to find out if any of the medic types have any ideas (coz I haven’t and the paramedic wasn’t sure) pulse 88, BP 120/72, temp around 36.2, sugar 5.1, heartbeat erratic with a bit of tachy/brachy which I get anyway, but that is what scared them. And then they rang Mrs DB and asked if she was next of kin and could she meet them at the hospital as I was being taken in by ambulance......150 miles away.
Epilogue
No idea what caused it. Nutrition? Knocking back the codeine? Fluids? Nearly went down again two days later in Sainsburys, been dizzy and nauseous ever since but a little less each day so far. Still tachy/brachy but still no firm diagnosis.
Will I go back? I would, but Mrs DB has set up a metaphorical laser guided chain gun at the bottom of the garden trained on me if I ever mention it again. She has OK’d all events up to half IM plus any relay but not the whole caboose and INSISTS that I buy a full 3 discipline HRM. Garmin 910XT gets the thumbs up then.
I feel gutted, ashamed, inadequate, stupid and angry.
On the flip side, the back quack seems to think he can restore up to 50% mobility in my spine after I unknowingly broke L5 and damaged L4 a while back. Well, mobility is 15% at the moment, so Never say Never Again.
I would just like to add special individual congrats to Saffers, who worked so hard on the bike, to Siggy, who made it round and yes I am jealous you fat retired git;O), to Soupy who utterly embodies the pirate spirit and to Podds, who kept me company, made a long ru
The rest of that sentence.
I would just like to add special individual congrats to Saffers, who worked so hard on the bike, to Siggy, who made it round and yes I am jealous you fat retired git;O), to Soupy who utterly embodies the pirate spirit and to Podds, who kept me company, made a long run seem very short and who got her dream. And of course, to Barlos and his spirit.
Great candid report DB. You've nothing to feel ashamed about. You gave Outlaw your best. I hope you can mend fairly well and enjoy your 910xt as a reward if nothing else
You were one of the Pirates who took quite a few people in that last paragraph on their first Surrey rides so as cheesy as it sounds, a bit of you was part of their success.
Get recovered get that back sorted and crack on
Not normally this smokey in here this early! Nice report btw!
Dusty, you were my inspiration and mentor for this. Without your Surrey rides and your cajolling I would never have even made it to the start line let along around. So thank you for all you did to make that possible for me. I owe you such a lot. If you need a sherpa or whatever anytime, just let me know!
If Mrs DB doesn't want you doing the whole thing for the foresable future, how about a relay at Henly? I'll do the swim!! You can do the rest or find someone to do either the bike or run? Lord H? Being Henly, Mrs DB could come along with the rugrats and support! That way she'll be closer to the Ambulance / Hospital too!
With your back issue you did bloody well getting round and off the bike, let alone half way round the run. Top effort, just gutted you weren't there in the massage tent afterwards with some bling around your neck.
When you're up to it lets go out for another ride / beer. Please! Despite complaining about your yakking, I do miss it, sometimes!!
A courageous report DB, which I'm sure was difficult for you to write.
I had followed your progress right up to the start line, and you were someone I was looking forward to meet.
You realised that training hadn't gone to plan and that you would be up against it, but you still embodied true sportsmanship and guts by getting yourself to the start line and giving it your all. And, you very nearly pulled it off!
I hope you keep at it and get yourself well enough to give it another bash, us BoP'ers need all the personalities we can muster.
DB - I can understand the first one, but none of the others.
Mother Nature decided to call a halt to your day before you damaged yourself too much You cannot control that.
By all means feel that way if you had not trained and had only yourself to blame. But this was a case of circumstances beyond your control, so please stop beating yourself up about it
Thank you
Fantastic effort DB, I know I would be gutted if I were in your shoes, you put 110 percent in you deserve it more than some. As they say never say never, some day when your back is sorted you may be back fitter and stronger, enjoy the build up.
DB amazing personal report
You might not have finished DB but your report is inspiring
Dusty full respect for you mate... you came so far and did so well. I was gutted when I heard what had happened!
I WILL finish my report tomorrow!! (Have plans tonight!)
DB, wow what a report. I would be very happy to join you on a Surrey cycle ride.
Ready Steady Crew - SteadyCJ swim and run, SteadySteve bike
Swim 1:43:01 - first time doing the full distance, water horrible but expected along with a few biffs, the zig zag swimmer cutting me up. Smell of vomit on return part. Overall very happy to have made it within cut off.
Bike 6:035:xx reported to me as windy, very windy, no problem with Oxton Bank and stayed aero as much as poss. He also got his bottle in the shopping trolley at the Pirate feed station.
Run 7:05 planned 4:1 run/walk went out of the window early on just ran and walked when needed. Lower back twanged so had to walk with tiny run bits. Pirate support was amazing. Finished with a jog, got very cold after, brain gone to mush so went back to campsite to get warm and give relay mate his medal.
Fuller report can be found on the training for a shorter tri thread.
Can you include why you are Golden Boots. Mrs Brightside thought she heard why from the anouncer at the finish but she cant remember why?
DB, it was a hell of an achievement getting to the start line considering your back problems. Nothing to feel ashamed about, You gave it your best shot. You came out of the water at about the same time as me. Was it you I exchanged a handshake with on the way into T1?
You also got me round my first proper pirate bike ride when I was cramping, crying and toppling sideways, and we were ages behind the broom wagon. Always grateful for that, thank you.
Dustboy, I totally echo what everyone else has said, its quite understandable youre gutted and I really feel for you.
No way should you feel inadequate or stupid. You gave it your all and no one can ask anything more. Various things conspired against you on the day and there was nothing you could have done about it.
Just think what you have achieved, you nailed the swim and the bike we all had a great weekend together.
You should hold you head high, youve done so much on here for newbies and should be congratulated.
Good work.
Aw Dustboy, I agree with everyone else, nothing to feel but pride in giving it your all. So sorry to hear you had such bad back problems from the outset, what a nightmare. Loads of people have always commented on how much you've helped during bike rides, and if i lived down Surrey way i'd have been out looking for your advice too, lol! Hope you recover okay, and look forward to hearing about your next exploits (so long as the laser gun doesn't get you first)
Well done Dusty bin....
I only managed to make one of the surrey rides but had a great day out and was great to see how motivational coach DB can be for some of the guys who are not so confident or speedy on a bike!
That was my first reaction too when I read your report, DB. Well, maybe a little anger too, but only at the misfortunes that life chucks at you sometimes. You did all the hard work, got yourself out on to the run - that much you could control and you did. What happened beyond that was as much outside your control as getting a puncture during the bike.
Couldn't agree more with the Coach's wise words and those of the others above
Dusty I owe you shed loads as one of the aforementioned newbies
- a couple of Surrey Hills rides where your patience and generosity of advice and spirit were much appreciated
- some company on the last miles of the bike and advice about those hairy potholes and speed bumps along the dodgy road
- and last but not least, fantastic company on the run while we were together
You said I had the patience of a saint listening to you on the run but to be honest it was the best part of the whole day and a real pleasure for me - those miles just flew by when we were together thanks to your chattiness and I was so sorry when you had to drop out.........but I knew the pills you'd had and the pain you'd suffered and you went from looking ok to looking really rough (sorry!) very quickly and it was clear you'd reached the end of your tether
Hold your head up high, you deserve to
I can understand being gutted and also angry at "life" on that day but you have nothing to be ashamed about or feel stupid about
Drinks are on me next time
Oi, Podds, get in line!
I think the back of the queue to buy him a drink starts around the corner!!
So, when's the next Surrey ride?