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To last weeks badger. ( R.I.Pieces)
LOOK before you cross the damn road.
I did not want to spend most of last weekend repairing my vehicle due to your lack of abiltity in appreciating that the white, noisy, moving Thing might, just might, not have the ability to fly over you as you shuffle toward instant Death. You avoided the car going the other way FFS.... and yet You still managed to place your body just were it would wreck several expensive parts on my vehicle, and while I understand that your insides are now outsides, ( some 20 miles from most of the other bits ) and your ability to read any internet web page may have been difficult in the first place... I hope you get the bloomin point !!!!!
Let that be a lesson to all the other badgers Wiggrun.
I think your point may be lost on flat badger...
For the love of god.....................
That is the third major piece of work you have stated is "top priority". And if you tell staff to leave everything else to complete one bit of work, don't then give them a hard time when you get a complaint from another department about something else being late. I know it's not (totally) your fault that we're so busy, but in your position, you can tell the other department that they will have to wait. It's not fair on someone getting paid less than half what you do that they have to deal with all the crap.
And if you don't tell me about a problem, how the fuck can you expect me to have sorted it?
Now piss off and leave me alone. To get on with all the work we need to get done TODAY!
*massages Nessie's shoulders*
Cup of tea love?
Thanks LB.
Actually, now that the Painters have arrived <cough>, I'm feeling much calmer anyway.
(But I'll still take the cup of tea)
Dear colleague, you worry me. There are so many exciting things to do in Vegas so why are you recommending to the lovely young girl in your team that she visits the Gun Club when she's there next weekend? Why do you think she'd be interested in playing with AK47s? Actually, why are you so interested in automatic weapons and how have you become so well informed? It's not just from watching CSI, I know that.
Thank you for your concern regarding how we'll manage when you're gone.
For the last four years you've only really been here for 3 months on and off, after two consecutive lots of maternity leave followed by time off with 'stress', so we all got so used to doing your job that feels second nature now.
So... I think we'll be just fine, ... but thanks for asking.
Dear daughter,
Thank you so much for using HALF A BOTTLE of my Molton Brown in your bubble bath last night. It was only £27 a bottle.
I shall be considering docking it out of your pocket money until next year. The Aldi one is yours!
Dear David Lloyd Leisure
Thank you for your kind phone call inviting us to rejoin your premier health and fitness club at a special rate.
It seems you have missed the point. The special rate should be LESS than your competitors, who piss all over you in terms of their facilities, management and general attitude, not FIVE times the price.
I would rather stand naked in Marks and Spencers window and stick breadsticks up my arse than even consider rejoining until you SPEND some money on your clubs, treat your staff and members with respect and not contempt and learn not to bite the hand that feeds you.
Is that in any way unclear?
Ah but a little Molton Brown goes a long way if you use it properly.
Rant for today:
My job used to be easy - you went into a simple straightforward system and it took no time at all. Now you want the website to look nicer and do fancy stuff the job is a fecking nightmare with systems that don't work properly, logically or fast enough and all of which require a different password FFS.
I am a Copywriter not a IT expert and I'm sick off all your techy crap preventing my job as well or as quickly as it can - and, in fact, used to be - done.
i have just told you that i will not allow you to buy two packets of those sodding tablets in case you top yourself or make yourself extremely ill. asking me twice more as to why you cant have them and telling me you have taken them before makes not a jot of difference. yes write to your M.P if you f'ing well like - i dont give a toss really because he will tell you i am right and you are wrong you moron. now sod off.
actually , you can have two packs , make it four or five and i wont have to see to you again.....*and breathe*
Laurabeddington. If you are a real person, you're the vilest most bigoted person I've ever seen on twitter.
If you're a troll just trying to get yourself into the trends, then you've probably succeeded.
Do feel free to go and have a look peeps.
I would LOVE to believe that in a world of tolerance, understanding and respect for other human beings, people like her do NOT exist.
Sadly, I was at a party last week with idiots who had no trouble at all declaring that their bigoted views and they weren't too far from hers.
And some of them were members of my family.
Facebook tip off Ian.
Vile isn't it?
And the worst thing is, she's been shortened to LB!
Mail LLB.
I've been talking on FB about this.
I thnk what she says is utterly VILE, but should she be prevented from saying from saying it, just because we don't happen to agree with her?
How far should censorship go in what we say / don't say?
Don't get me wrong, if one of my kids spouted stuff like that, their feet wouldn't touch the floor...
The Daily Mail condensed into 140 characters...amazing