RW Forum 5 - Sub 5

Dr Daffs

Well! Grab a cuppa cos I'm going to indulge myself in an epic race report since I've dragged this out for months longer than all the other RW Forum Mentor threads

Bloody FREEZING this morning. Couldn't bring myself to take long sleeved top off.

Set off at a fair lick, and after about 3 miles was caught up by the 5.15 pacer (hadn't realised there'd be one). Figured I wouldn't keep up for the whole race but might as well enjoy the company for a while

Had great fun Lots of shouting and singing and nonsense Enjoyed myself immensely

Miles 1-12 ('wayhey, I might even get a 2 hour PB!')

11.05, 11.39, 11.29, 12.14, 12.17, 12.28, 12.26, 11.56, 11.58, 12.15, 11.52, 13.02

Felt strong and good, but that pace is slightly too speedy for me over that distance, and I was doing run 9/walk 1 (plan was run 4/walk1). Passed mum and sister at 7 miles, dumped long sleeved t shirt - they were very shocked to see me so quickly!

And so, at some point during mile 12, I had to reluctantly admit there was no chance I could keep up with the 5.15 pacer...

Miles 13-18 ('where's the feckin sweeper bus, I've feckin HAD ENOUGH')

13.57, 15.05, 14.29, 15.19, 17.11, 17.39

COMPLETE sense of humour failure through this section! Hit half way at 2.42 (half marathon PB is 2.30 so not too bad) but legs just felt so wobbly and hips hurt and I was quite bored.

Stuck Woman's Hour podcasts on in a bid to drown out voice in head which was planning exactly how I'd explain at work that I'd dropped out. Strangely enough, I remember planning this last time too

Fortunately the sweeper bus wasn't directly behind me so I didn't get chance Bumped into mum and sister again at mile 16 and swapped to new shoes - not because I thought they'd help, but because it meant I got to stop for a minute. For the first 10 mins I wore them, they felt so strange they barely felt like shoes at all, more like some alien being.

Miles 19-20 ('don't know who this bloke is but he's going to make sure I don't get on the bus')

16.33, 19.19

Picked up some bloke and we walked these two miles. He'd only entered on Thursday and not run for over a year (and never run a marathon at all). We both moaned quite a lot, and talked in great detail about savory food. Nearly kissed some marshalls at mile 20 who gave us a cheese butty

Miles 21-23 ('I am damn well not going to run this far without getting a bloody medal')

21.01, 17.15, 20.12

Yet more sense of humour failure. And leg failure. Bloke ditched me when I stopped with mum and sister again. Sister ran alongside me for a bit and supervised my use of portaloo (last time I locked myself in one at mile 22 and refused to come out). She made sure I got on my way. Grumped quite a lot, and could barely run at all by this point.

Miles 24 and 25 ('can I get the St John's ambulance to tell me to stop?')

18.58, 16.14

Foot hurt quite a lot so I chanced my luck stopping with the ambulance people, hoping it'd be black and blue when I took sock off and i'd have a legitimate reason to stop. Sadly there was nothing wrong with it, and it didn't hurt at all when I wasn't running, so they sent me on my way. Fiends.

Mile 2

Dr Daffs

Mile 26 ('I am NOT going to be last again, damn you!!')

12.09 (then the last 0.4 miles at 10.53 pace)

Cheerful bike marshall admitted there was only ONE person behind me. Well, I wasn't having that!

Summoned all my reserves of strength and determination, and for some reason remembered a bizarre phrase that Marrows (on the sub 3.30 thread) used - he said in his last miles he'd felt like 'some kind of creeping jungle beast or robot'... With that phrase going round in my head I ignored all pain and put my head down.

FINALLY overtook the bloke who had walked (with a limp!!) all the way round ahead of me. And another two bokes, and a couple of women as well (I don't think they were impressed) SO many people cheering along the river at this point Felt like I was winning the olympics

Even managed a sprint finish as the announced shouted 'here's Daffs - and she's NOT LAST this year!!'

Garmin time 6.24.24, which gives me a PB of 30 mins Outside the cut off so I won't get an official time I don't think (gah!) but right now I don't care

Thank you SO much for all the lovely support on this thread, and for Kaz for being such a good mentor and enthusiast and leading by excellent example I'm not going to apologise for being nowhere near my goal time

Back to parkruns for me and the occasional Half I think - I think twice is enough to prove I'm not cut out for distance running

Dr Daffs

The best bits...

* * Such lovely supporters, all the way round! Kids giving out sweets and picking up water bottles, families standing outside their houses, old folk cheering from the bandstand, people outside pubs, and of course my mum and sister in their mad t shirts popping up at various points on the course

LOvely lovely lovely

* SUCH a well organised race

Lots of volunteer marshalls, all gorgeous and fab, plenty of water and sports drink, and medal AND long sleeved running t shirt and decent goody bag at the end

* saw some lovely running pals from the forum (even if they did leave me for dust and finished 2.5 hours ahead of me!)
* the marshall who gave me a cheese butty at mile 20. Nearly asked her to marry me

* all the other runners. The guy in a spiderman costume that completely covered his face. The guy in a complete gorilla outfit, raising money for charity after his baby son was still born. The blind runner running with a 76 year old guide. The army folks with GIANT rucksacks. And my personal favourite, the bloke with terminal cancer, with a very convincing fake arse sewn onto the back of his shorts

Kept me going for many miles

(needless to say ALL of these people finished ahead of me!)

Lessons learned...
(1) don't run another marathon. They hurt, and the amount of time you'll knock off your PB is not worth it for the amount of training you have to do!

Dr Daffs

(sorry, I have NO idea what I did to the formatting there but I'm afraid I can't be arsed to fix it! Sorry!!)

Ultra Kanga Kazzaaaaah

Bloody well done Daffs. Great PB . Lots of positives there



Hopefully the recovery is going well and your hip and foot are settling down. Get someone to check them out if you're still having issues in a week or so.



Enjoy the park runs and halves. Look forward to following your progress

Dr Daffs

Thanks Kaz  

Not done any permanent damage, I've been a bit achey as you'd expect (!) but it's pretty much wearing off now. 

Been a bit grumpy at not getting anywhere near 5 hours  even though I was expecting not to! But I have proved to myself that the amount of training I'm willing to do will probably never get me under the cut off, and I'm just not cut out to be a speedy distance runner  

Back to work then I suppose!