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Heather Mills Mccartney
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"The point I was trying to make is that some of us really had big loss of earnings to support our husband's successful ventures and that needs to be taken into account. "
Mabelle, as I understand it, the current law is supposed to compensate a spouse who does that, not only for the income they 'gave up' during the relationship but also for the on-going effects into the future of having given up on a career; that is why it would have suited Ms Mills to show that she was earning a lot before the marriage. Morally, that must be right, although perhaps less so in cases where it simply suited the individual not to continue to work because they could now be supported without having to do so. (I am not for one minute suggesting that applies in your case, just to be clear! It sounds as though you were treated badly, and I know other people who have had similar things done to them.)
She's been out on a shopping spree already, I see ...
Apologies if this has already appeared
Alledgedly .... Heather Mills first issued divorce proceedings due to her Christmas disappointment. As a gift Sir Paul had spent in excess of £800 buying a carbon fibre prosthetic leg for her. She went mental … not realising that it wasn’t her main chrissy present it was just a stocking fillerWell, it was clear her claim was completely outrageous and founded on a lot of unsupported assertions as to her wealth before she met Macca.
No man in his right mind would go anywhere near this woman now - there is a point beyond which "independence" "feistiness" and "individuality" become stridency, stroppiness and an inability to compromise. Life's too short to have to deal with people like her.
Women like her give the rest of us a bad name, it's a wonder anyone still gets married.
The thing that continues to horrify me is just how far some people (male and female) will go to hurt the person they used to claim to love, using the kids as pawns, clearning them out financially, turning once mutual friends against them, or however else they do it.
A wise friend of mine says that the opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference.
Some excerpts from a recent article on this:
Mills came to public attention in 1993, when she sold her story to the News of the World, after being mown down by a police motorcyclist engaged on an emergency call - an accident that led to the loss of her left leg below the knee. She had begun doing charity work a year before, when she set up a refugee crisis centre in London for those fleeing civil war in the former Yugoslavia; the accident apparently inspired her to redouble her efforts. She established the Heather Mills Health Trust - which recycles prosthetic limbs - and by the time that she ran into McCartney at the 1999 Pride of Britain awards, she was well-known and respected as a charity campaigner.
The TV interviews that she gave last year did not help her - she was clearly highly agitated, angry and perturbed. That said, there are plenty of male celebrities who have seemed much more on edge, out of control and self dramatising than Mills, without attracting any real criticism. As Mills, Britney Spears and Amy Winehouse have now realised, the same rules do not apply to women - especially when anger enters the mix. Mills is clearly a woman scorned and she has reacted with abject fury, railing against McCartney, the press and the public, spitting that "everyone jumps on the bandwagon, makes money out of my misery". In accusing everyone, she pushes away any potential supporters.
Mills was always at a disadvantage - she was marrying an older man who is many people's untouchable hero. Nobody will believe bad things about him, and the corollary of that is always going to be envy of anybody who marries him, which quickly tips into denigration and a kind of character assassination.
Considering the stereotypes that have been applied to Mills, the extent of her vilification and humiliation, it is hard not to feel pity for her at the outright misogyny that she has ended up carrying. One of the aspects of this misogyny that is most interesting is how much of it has come from women who might generally be expected to recognise the female-hatred in her portrayal and rush to her defence. The same is true in rape trials - women on juries are unsympathetic to other women. The fact is that misogyny is so pervasive that it's never just men who are affected by it and schooled in it - women are brought up around misogyny too, and so they internalise it as much as anyone.
There is an element of fear in the hatred of Mills, because women want to dissociate themselves from her situation - women instinctively know that it could happen to them. Beyond the stereotypes, though, there is a human being who is obviously hurt, clearly in pain, who does not really seem to have done anything particularly heinous, and surely deserves another hearing. Last year, Mills commented that her treatment came down to the fact that she had "married an icon, and because we split up ... [Linda] went through the same, and then she was revered when she died. Maybe if the death threats came true and I was dead, the same thing might happen to me. But do we have to get to that point?"
<!--Article is not commented: 0 -->Hmm interesting article and I see you why have posted it Slo Sho.
From my perspective though, the fact that "women" are allegedly more vilified than than men with similar behaviour patterns is not proven I remember the feeding frenzy over Gazza, Hugh Grant etc etc. And the allegation of "misogyny" is particularly shaky.
I don't see how this can be misogyny when a) Women are if anything more critical of this woman than men are and b) Some of the main culprits on Fleet Street and the celeb mags who stoke up and condemn people like Amy Wineshop and Britney are primarily women.
The proliferation of trashy celeb mags - which is largely a female market managed by females - shows that women are effortlessly good at slagging off their sisters without any help from the men. Its schoolground bitchiness writ large - oo look at Britneys spots/cellulite/trashy dress sense whatever. the only men who are interested in this bilge are gay.
And the article does not answer the finding of the judge that she made numerous unsupported assertions in her bid to shiv 30% of Paul McCartney's fortune (Yesterday, Hey Jude, etc etc - most of which was done 40 years ago) for 4 years marriage, which is a disreputable thing to do in my book.
I agree in part with the point of Slo Slo's post. I think the original thread was also asking do we judge Heather harshly? No I don't think we do but there is a certain unpleasant revelling in her misery based on previous jealousy at her having married a man with money ?
There have been studies which show that women are given longer sentences for same crimes as men.
Judgements are made on how far you have fallen - we are more tolerant if we think the behaviour is to be expected? Whereas women (esp mothers) are supposed to be gentle, feminine and not competitive nor ambitious.
The rape trial comment is very true - men are far more likely to sympathise with the woman. Women lack solidarity unless they relate to the other woman........... in this situation they will distance themselves.
But as JB says... Heather did put herself forward for some of this by being dishonest about her finances and her 'public relations' lack somewhat. The public may never have been sympathetic towards her but she has handed them more reasons
still think St Paul of Macca is a twit - the man is 60-odd for godsakes and he jumps into a new relationship with someone who reminds him of his recently dead wife (and he fathers another kid at that age..shes gonna want for a father sooner or later) -yes i know he was griefstruck but he should have listened to his grown up kids when they urged caution about getting involved with someone else so soon (whether or not it was HM and they didnt like her) -it was bound to go t!ts up in those circumstances
its not like hes gonna miss a few million is it - surely thats the price he has to pay for his unwise decision - hopefully he is now older and wiser and they can all get on with their lives
(and his recent music is crap)
JB I think mysogyny can very much come from women. It's about internalising negative attitudes about one's own sub-group - something black people have identified in the past as "Uncle Tom" or "Bounty Bar" characters, for example. I also think of my own family, from a deprived working-class environment, and guilty of the most cringe-making grovelling to the middle and upper classes because they have so wholly internalised a belief in their own inferiority based on class.
As Mrs P said I was responding to the original question, and trying to identify what it is that makes me feel so uncomfortable about the stuff I hear about Mills. I agree that the woman comes across as an unpleasant, manipulative and dishonest person, but just because someone is not a nice person doesn't make it ok to treat them badly, tempting though it is. When I read the article I quoted from it just made me recognise some of the reasons why I feel uneasy about the vilification of Mills.
I also can remember times in my own life when I have been engaged in a battle that I felt very strongly about, where I have allowed emotion to cloud my judgement and impair my sense of proportion, and looking back on those times I became so entrenched in the fight that I was unable to see the bigger picture. I regret some of the things I said or did under the influence of strong emotion, and I suspect that Mills will too. I think what she really needs now is a good friend who will give her a talking-to and tell her to shut up and step out of the limelight until she has developed some perspective on her situation.
sorry but anyone run over by police on blues and twos is a bit thick,
They have flashing lights and go NE-NAH very loudly. IE stay the f*ck out of the way until danger has passed not i have the right of way.
JB im not being funny but police/ambulance/fire pass thousands every year with out accident.
But some manage to step into the road and get hit. They are bright, nosiy and flash. to step infront of one is beyond.
you hear sirens, insticnt should say, assess the danger. not im more important and carry on a normal. however i think mills has proved this in many ways.
TT,
very harsh and not relevent whatsoever to the discussion on this thread.
Slo ho, obviously you are speaking from a position of experience and perhaps a perspective based on that experience that some of us do not see... however, I feel strongly in this case that Heather through her actions has given myself the perspective, and yes it is merely my own perspective, that she really has a warped sense of what she truellly "deserves" and a rather self centred and extremely selfish mentality.
Selfishness and a self-cetred mentality are personality traits which really irritate me and although the media may have sensationalised these aspects I still believe she has those traits in abundance.
Not particularly enamoured with McCartney but to be honest I find myself really not liking Heather's actions, outbursts and claims.
I think TT's post has summed up Slo Slo's argument.........
They are not that rare?
I think she would have won the whole world back over to her side, if as part of the divorce settlement she could have banned him from making anymore records
This woman is just getting too much press. If everyone would just stop talkng about her she would fade into the world. Ignore her and she will go away. The press in every form will only keep her in the news if we show any interest. Which I have none of.
RR
One single posting on RW ?
....on a subject which she has 'no interest in'
She is just funny I think. If you gave her a stick with shit on one end, she would grab the end with shit on. She hangs herself, so keep giving her the rope I say.
I am pretty bored with it now to be honest. I do find it funny that she sacked her lawyers, represented herself (badly by all accounts) and now in a total U-turn wants the terms of the settlement and the judgment kept secret after spending months threatening to tell all. me thinks someone has come out looking like a loony!?!
This is vaguely amusing :-
Mister Bellamy