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Pirate Records, Rankings and Shieldholders
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iron
do dishes
use the remote
cook
earn loads of money
shop
I think that about covers it
Stands back
iron
do dishes
use the remote
cook
earn loads of money
shop
I think that about covers it
Stands back"
No mention of blow jobs?
First, there is BEST WOMAN. Back in the day there were only 2 or 3 girlies, but now there are loads, so mellifera thought it was only fair to add a women's trophy. Esp as she will probably win it.
Second, there is BEST IMPROVER. This is biggest increase in overall % finisher position. It will be a nightmare to work out, so I decided that Barley can do it. If you think you're in contention, bring a printout of your result in your previous ironman, and hand it to Carl at the booze up. DNFs count (if they quit, you beat them!)
and don't forget to sign up for the 2008 extravaganza, IM France 2008, which will be bigger and better than ever
(or maybe smaller and worse; who can say?)
******************************************
HALL OF FAME (Record holders)
Men:
IM: Multi-parrot Admiral Rosey (9:56) [previous - Rosey; 10:30]
Double IM: ---
Triple IM: Pirate King Blackbeard Candy Ollier (about 55 hours or something)
Deca: ---
Women:
IM: Captain Monique (11:4X) [previous - Monique; 11:5x]
Double IM: ---
Triple IM: ---
Deca: ---
SHIELD HOLDERS (until the next official annual Pirate IM competition - IM Austria 2007)
Fastest Finisher 145
2006 = Admiral Rosey
2005 = Junior Pirate Count
Best Novice 145
2006 = Semen Ergo
2005 = Semen Barlist
Fastest Chick 3.9
New for 2007!
Not nearly as crap as last year 145
New for 2007!
The Rank system. On a points basis, where only IM distance or longer counts for points. Its not a knitting club. 1 point per IM finish. 1 bonus point for doing the extra hard ones (norseman, lanzarote and [but only if you get in by the honourable route, qualification] hawaii). 2 points for double IM finish. 3 points for Triple, 5 points for Deca. 1 bonus point for every time you win a shield or set a record (above). 1 bonus point for becoming "reasonably competent" (i.e. the first time you crack 12 hours). 1 bonus point for becoming "outstanding" (i.e. the first time you crack 10 hours). -1 point for a DNF (its not a quitting club). Note that if you miss cut off but still finish the course (even if it takes 20 hours) then you still get the point.
ranks
-2 tritalker
-1 plank
0 landlubber
1 scurvey dog
2 seaman
3 junior pirate
4 pirate
5 2nd mate
6 1st mate
7 commander
8 captain
9 admiral
10 admiral (2 parrots)
11 admiral (3 parrots) etc
15 pirate king blackbeard
(obviously after greek michael butchers it, the actual engraving will be a random collection of symbols anyway)
Pebble you forgot to add raging sex drive to the list.
btw congratulations on getting the leaves on your hat. or whatever the airforce equivalent is.
Nah, you have healthy competition for this! ;o)
(although, not in Austria)
as i won't be there (so won't be either totally exhausted or totally p1ssed or both) i'm happy to do the best improver award calculations. if i have hte info beforehand i can sort most of it out. then the results will no doubt be online or available via ironmanlive. could jsut text the winner to candy.
[thinks about entering the Mr into IMN instead] ;o)
x = (finishing place in this race)/(total number of starters in this race)
y = (finishing place in previous race)/(total number of starters in previous race)
z = x/y
lowest z wins
therefore you need to factor in DNFs but not DNSs (if they quit, the finisher beat them... but sometimes finisher lists exclude DNFs so you need to check)
and it's finish position in the whole field - no fake adjustment for gender or age group
that's the fairest way of doing it. of course you could fix it (eg if an elderly femal pirate was to enter lanza one year, then florida, to play the odds). but if you're that desperate to win a crap shield, you deserve it!!
candy - i think i have your new number on an email somewhere.