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Or we could hang their children from cranes like in Iran.
Pls come back to crazy sentence - your cunning linguism is missed!
marshallini wrote (see)
All races should be chip timed with recorders at every mile or km and when you cross each mat it'll record your pace and if it is below 10 minute mile average (or something, could be adjusted) then the specially adapted chips which are worn around your neck electrocute you in to unconsciousness so you can't continue that way there is no onus on the marshals to make any decisions.
oiii you............I ran FLM last year and stil averaged over 10m/m
have now realised that rather than soldier on when my knees gave up the race I would probably have gone faster run/walking..........so if your talking about running..what speed do we count as running..............some people can run 12 min/ mil the whole way...................
some might say anything slower than 7 min miling and your not really running.....
seren nos - that was just a random figure I did say it could be adjusted (up or down).
You could also supply each runner with a button which they could use once during the race to electrocute anyone with 3 meters of them.
marshallini................i think your being mean only being able to use it once..............I could think of loads of people I could use it on..............but I would have to use alot of them in the line at the start or I would never be close enough to use it
I'm working on a pocket or handbag sized cattle prod, I was planning to use it on those people who stop dead at the top of escalators or right outside shop doorways, but I'm sure it could be adapted to a race scenario.
First zap to anyone who pulls out of a race halfway through because they don't think they're going to get a good enough time.
PloddingOn wrote (see)
I think everyone should have a chip around their necks and anyone can electrocute them! I think that sounds fun!
As fox hunting is now banned how about using the hounds?
Depending on the distance everyone is given a head start (e.g. 5 mins for a 5Km, 10mins for a 10Km, etc) then release the hounds. Anyone crossing the line with teeth marks is disqualified.
I am sure we would all run a PB with a pack of dogs and some toss pot in a red jacket on a horse chasing you.
I was thinking more about sprint finish use really, zapping them and going and hoping the don't recover in time to zap you back.
could you arrange to have a big ZAP! sign to appear over the runners heads like in the comics? ZAP! for a first offense then KAPOW!! or BIFF!!
For members of 1980's popular beat combos you could hit them with a WHAM!
The technology must exist. I saw something similar in Star wars - R2D2 produced holographic images and that's over 30 years ago. Must be doable.
'release the hounds'
Going back to the OP.
Funnily enough, KK and Andrew Smith were advocating this very policy for an Ultra Marathon in the West Midlands.
I bet you could be a really fast rece walker kk
Are you doing a double KK?
What a loony! When?
TET - what would you do about walkers in ultras!? Its common practice to employ a run/walk strategy! (apologies if anyone has already asked this...been busy!).
May I suggest a spud gun fired at the thighs/arse of anyone wlaking in distances of half marathon and under (unless its spectacularly hilly - such as Langdale 1/2 mara......1 in 3 hills are tough to run up!)
Now you're getting the hang of it ET. Depending on the car that nabs them they could be cut down by Mexican bola things, taken out by a ninja star or thwacked with a boomerang - make all our international runners feel at home too. Now what could we do with the Scots?
Nick - spud guns! Haven't heard that for ages! Can you still buy them?
KK - you're not sane. You really aren't.<goes off to look for loony thread on tri>
Aza....im sure you can...can buy anything on t'internet!
Either those or have a large number of people whipping people with teatowels....ooooh stingy!
Wet teatowels! Kinky!
Do we have to run in thongs?
<puts in order for spudgun> cheers Farnie!
My suggestion is to have the checkpoints manned by either gentlemen or, alternatively, very large and butch ladies, wearing white coats and stethoscopes and ominously twanging rubber gloves at anyone who walks or does less than, say, 9 min miling.
I have no problem with people who find they need to walk a bit towards the end of races (I have been there and done that - in fact I had to when I did the London marathon, and yet still managed to finish in the first 25% of finishers in 3:46). I also don't have a problem with those who decide to follow a specific run-walk program to get round.
However, I do have a problem with people who enter running races with the sole intention of walking the whole way (or nearly all of it). If you want to do that - do the Moonwalk instead of the London marathon, or enter some of the Long Distance Walkers events.
If your going to use cars then use cars with big ass sycthed blades on the wheels like an old war chariot.
Follow that with the sweeper car sweeping up the limbs of non-triers.
Excuse me everyone, but i'm doing the Yateley 10k next Wednesday. Are any of you marshalling? If so i'll just kill myself on the start line