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Crap at relationships
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*crosses fingers & toes in case it might help*
Oh and no, I don't mean battery operated. Too noisy if you have flatmates. Apparently....
Don't remember that being mentioned in the Karma Sutra but if it adds to the occasion .....
With another person present.
Ooh sex with a rabbi.....
They are missing a bit, aren't they? Wonder what that's like?
We'll not be seeing much of you on here this weekend then LB
Right, I'll chuck this one into the mix .... came from a conversation we were having at work today ... can a relationship work if there is no real sexual spark between you but you really like each other? The sex is there, meets a need but hasn't been anywhere near DRS stylee but you basically get on very well ... and I'm talking starting that way not growing that way over time.
My answer was a definite no but I was in a minority.
I think I'm with you TP.
I'd go with the spark. Sex just "being there" wouldn't be enough for me.
The aforementioned person nearly always made the first move... usually as I was literally at the front gate after coming home! And by jaysus she was a sexy looking girl... she also had a mind like a sewer - it takes a lot to shock me but she managed it quite regularly. I saw her about a year ago after a gap of 6 years and she still looks fantastic.
(I think I lost about 2 stone in the 18 months we were together)
Looks fade though.
For me it's not looks, although I do fancy the OH hugely, but even if I didn't then the person inside would do the trick coupled with.... Oh feck this may be TMI but somehow something just physically works I have no idea why, but unlike with the ex my mind doesn't wander, and the oohs and ahs are real
Well, he is a big chap, Hash
I totally agree. You know pretty much immediately if the potential is there, or if it isn't.
And while you could live comfortably with someone when it wasn't there, being friends and everything, and even having "ho hum" sex, once somebody turned up who DID create that spark, you'd be in trouble.
What TP said
I still say that looks lose their effect. After six months you look at the person you're with and see who they really are, and after you get off the initial rollercoaster there's either something there or there isn't, no matter how much you like them.
The ex was, from a looks point of view, really attractive. I once said what sounded to him like "bollocks" at a crucial moment. Actually it was "hollyhocks" as I was thinking about what would look right in a corner of the garden. To this day, thankfully, he never knew.
Enough about theory, I'm off out to the 'Sex in the City' Zone to carry out some practicals..
I would say no too TP. I'm wondering if I'm a bit of an incurable romantic tho' and can I ever get both? I was chatting to a male friend recently and he said what Corinth said about the spark being halfway down his list. Perhaps he's more of a realist than me.
In terms of looks, I need to be attracted to someone physically - they wouldn't normally grow on me, but I do prefer men who are sexy rather than stereotypically good-looking. I tend to prefer the rough around the edges smiley, twinkly, imperfect specimen to the chiselled cheekbone, tall, dark handsome stereotype. *Laughs at the thought that I would have a choice between the 2 anyway*
Sexiness, often something you can't quite put your finger on
, tends to be longer-lasting than looks which can and do fade.
Get your Hadron out for the girls then Corrie