Thanks for the kind words, LR. I just get so frustrated - there is a Frodo that isn't anxious in social situations, but I seem to have lost her somewhere.
I find that my self-confidence feels at rock bottom at the moment. It really takes a lot of getting back but it's something that I think we just have to believe can be regained and keep working towards it.
Lincoln Rudolf thank you; I'm a bit overwhelmed I genuinely don't have the words to reply to that. Wow
Frodo you didn't look too anxious, you were your usual radiant self ... plus we had a fab hug
I have counted a few more positives. I told you guys the truth about some of my history when I'm usually very very reticent about it. I managed at the pub. I ate an apple back at the hosts house even though there were people there. I drove for 9 hours on my own without dissociating and my favourite that wouldnt have been possible a year ago I hugged everyone (and really meant it) I never thought I'd put that much trust in anyone let alone a whole group
I really really believe the missing self confidences can be restored. I can't not when I think about how much I've changed in the last year. Keep fighting, we'll all get there
I'm loving the Christmas names, it's really cheered me up
SOLB, you didn't seem at all nervous in the pub but *stern Paddington stare* you should have said something then you would have got an extra special hug.
Mick, yes we met at Mudchute. I was with Bear at the time, which may help you remember which one he is. We have also met at Stratford marathon last year, when it was cut down to a half.
Runs over to SOLB to collect one of her famous hugs. Solb, that is absolutely amazing. Write it on a post it and stick them on your fridge. Hunny, that is so wonderful
Ahh it's not as easy to say as to write SCaz - I don't think I've ever managed to say it straight off, though I can talk about it once someone already knows sometimes.
Aww by eck, you can have some virtual hugs now and I'll save some special it's so good to finally meet you ones for when we do eventually get together
Good guess Lincoln Rudolph ... I'm super curious about the name change now!!
Awww Turkey Soup Dragon (the name made me laugh.) How was it with your family?
Thank you so much for your support. I'm glad I did; both sticking it out in the pub and telling you about the trauma things
I think the one thing that would be good to achieve would be if I could manage a run after work tomorrow. I'm not sure I feel up to getting back to the Monday night group that I'm supposed to be running with but after today's efforts a shorter run on my own from home would be a more achievable target. Hopefully should be having a run with work colleagues after work on Tuesday. All cheerleading welcome - altogether now R-U-D-O-L-P-H.
I'm so pleased somebody got that. I felt sure it was going to be greeted with a 'who's he?'. Thought it was about time I made use of those symbols. I don't want anyone thinking I never show any emoti(c)on.
Enough stalling on my part I'm off to do my e-mail 'coming out' about my depression to the orienteering club members. Got to be done before I get into another week with excuses about not enough time etc.
Comments
Thanks for the kind words, LR. I just get so frustrated - there is a Frodo that isn't anxious in social situations, but I seem to have lost her somewhere.
Hugs called for methinks (((((Frodo)))).
I find that my self-confidence feels at rock bottom at the moment. It really takes a lot of getting back but it's something that I think we just have to believe can be regained and keep working towards it.
Oooh it's even changed the name on an old post
Frodo you didn't look too anxious, you were your usual radiant self ... plus we had a fab hug
I have counted a few more positives. I told you guys the truth about some of my history when I'm usually very very reticent about it. I managed at the pub. I ate an apple back at the hosts house even though there were people there. I drove for 9 hours on my own without dissociating and my favourite that wouldnt have been possible a year ago I hugged everyone (and really meant it) I never thought I'd put that much trust in anyone let alone a whole group
I really really believe the missing self confidences can be restored. I can't not when I think about how much I've changed in the last year. Keep fighting, we'll all get there
I'm loving the Christmas names, it's really cheered me up
SOLB, you didn't seem at all nervous in the pub but *stern Paddington stare* you should have said something then you would have got an extra special hug.
Mick, yes we met at Mudchute. I was with Bear at the time, which may help you remember which one he is. We have also met at Stratford marathon last year, when it was cut down to a half.
My guess for your name change is - by deck the halls it's holly.
Evening. I've just got back from a couple of days with my Mum and Sister.
Solb - so proud and got ooodles of respect for you for going into that pub and for opening up on your experiences here. What a fantastic achievement.
I'll read back further in a while but just had to respond to SOLB straight away. Pure gold that.
Ahh it's not as easy to say as to write SCaz - I don't think I've ever managed to say it straight off, though I can talk about it once someone already knows sometimes.
Aww by eck, you can have some virtual hugs now and I'll save some special it's so good to finally meet you ones for when we do eventually get together
Good guess Lincoln Rudolph ... I'm super curious about the name change now!!
Awww Turkey Soup Dragon (the name made me laugh.) How was it with your family?
Thank you so much for your support. I'm glad I did; both sticking it out in the pub and telling you about the trauma things
TSD - I assume you're back at work tomorrow. If so will be thinking of you and hope you get on OK.
Getting a bit nervous of facing another week myself - but hopefully I'm set for a better one than last week.
Is there anything positive planned into your week Rudolph? Maybe we can help to cheerlead you to reach it
I think the one thing that would be good to achieve would be if I could manage a run after work tomorrow. I'm not sure I feel up to getting back to the Monday night group that I'm supposed to be running with but after today's efforts a shorter run on my own from home would be a more achievable target. Hopefully should be having a run with work colleagues after work on Tuesday. All cheerleading welcome - altogether now R-U-D-O-L-P-H.
Give me an R
Ah, so your Christmas name is Father Jack Hackett?
ha ha haaaaaaaa
by feck it's chilly
Sorry, misheard your call. I had a mouthful of delicious chocolate fudge brownie ice.cream
I that by feck one!
I'm so pleased somebody got that. I felt sure it was going to be greeted with a 'who's he?'. Thought it was about time I made use of those symbols. I don't want anyone thinking I never show any emoti(c)on.
by feck it's holly
errrr I mean 'eck
Enough stalling on my part I'm off to do my e-mail 'coming out' about my depression to the orienteering club members. Got to be done before I get into another week with excuses about not enough time etc.
Good luck Rudolph; hopefully it'll get easier once you start